(Thanks again to guest author Raza for stepping up in the clutch, in other words, not being John Starks.)

New Jersey Nyets:  Have a 29-11 free throw advantage at home? Check  


Manage a 13 point lead? Check  


Allow one of the least efficient volume shooters in the league (Brandon Jennings) who barely cracks shooting 40% from the floor go for 34 points on while shooting 52% on the floor thus losing the game?  More Checks


New Orleans Hornets:  Yikes! Losing to a team that shot 0-12 from the 3 point land and only had 3 players hit double figures (highest of which was just 15) is bad enough.  But when I tell you that the team they lost to was the infamous Charlotte Bobcats.....well then, you can see why Eric Gordon has given up on the season with injuries so he can write his own version of Weezer's "Pinkerton" instead of spending another minute in uniform for the woe are we Hornets.  
I get that losing to Chicago is nothing to frown about (even though they were without Deng) but this team is in such disarray that rumors have been reported about the team trying to offload Melo, Amare (non-insured contract, good luck with that!), and perhaps even Chandler (though it would probably take a Howard type player to make that happen).  But, at least the signing of JR Smith was a good idea right?  Especially when you have to deal with him doing this before and after games.
I mean, JaVale McGee missed not one but two dunks, and judging by his top 8 plays of all time, that could be the norm:

Labels: Carmelo Anthony, guest author, JaVale McGee, LOL Nyets, Raza, Worst of the Night

Peek-a-boo!
Hey, Utah -- on the bright side, now that your team has lost all of its identity, now would be a perfect time to change names to something that makes more sense for your geographic location!

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

Is "jamming your opponent's nose into his brain" a legal defensive tactic?

It's soooo cold in Denver now

Do we need to explain to Pau how to hang on the rim?

Lamar Odom is not comfortable with this

Nationally Televised Games:
Thunder at Spurs, ESPN, 7pm: Hey, all right! A good start to the ESPN double-header!

Clippers at Hornets, ESPN, 9:30pm: ...And we follow that up with a Clippers road game? Damn it all. Yeah, Blake Griffin will do Blake Griffin things, but we all know how this one will end up.

All The Other Games:
Rockets at Cadavers, 7pm: So it appears that Gerald Wallace is heading to Portland, even though the Cadavers had been talking to the Bobcraps for several weeks as well about trying to get Wallace. Because yes, Gerald Wallace is the missing piece that would have gotten this Cleveland franchise turned around...

Pistons at Pacers, 7pm: The Pistons actually beat the Pacers in OT a few weeks ago. I'm not sure what happened there, since these teams have been going in opposite directions otherwise for awhile now thanks to the Pacers' dead coach bounce.

Kings at Magic, 7pm: I couldn't help but wonder if a matchup like this right after the All-Star break might result in the Magic coming out lethargic and not really into it, resulting in a surprisingly close game. Then I remembered these are the Purple Paupers we're talking about. It doesn't matter how lethargic the Magic look.

Wizards Generals at 76ers, 7pm: The Sixers need to win this one to split the season series with the Generals, and to keep from being the butt of every joke for weeks if they should let the Generals win a road game to take the season series. That would suck. A lot.

Bulls at Craptors, 7pm: Joakim Noah. Finally healthy. Thank God.

Bucks at Knicks, 7:30pm: So, is this the Bucks' team bus?

Oh, and I almost forgot: Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo Carmelo (deep breath) Caaaaaaaaaaaaarmelo.

Grizzlies at Timberwolves, 8pm: Better way to spend your time instead of watching this game: Five Seconds of Every #1 Song Ever. (Well, as long as "ever" means up until 1992.) I especially appreciated the harsh transition from Rick Dees' Disco Duck to Chicago's If You Leave Me Now.

Jazz at Mavericks, 8:30pm: Apparently Deron Williams first heard about being traded by watching SportsCenter. Do you think anyone planned to tell him he was traded, or did they just plan on catching him at the door when he showed up at the stadium tonight. "Uh, Deron, buddy... we need to talk..."

Hawks at Suns, 9pm: And the Hawks continue to be stuck in that zone of being just good enough to be in the playoffs, but not good enough to actually be good, and not bad enough to get good draft picks... Their offense has looked pretty ugly lately. Not Western Conference in the Null-Star game ugly, but still ugly.

Lakers at Frail Blazers, 10:30pm: Brandon Roy might be back for this game! Enjoy him while you can, Portland fans. I'm afraid of stat-cursing this, but the Blazers could lock down their longest win streak in three years tonight.

Labels: Bawful After Dark, Carmelo Anthony, Denver Nuggets, Utah Jazz

Psst. Have you heard? Carmelo Anthony hasn't signed a contract extension with the Nuggets yet. Rumor has it he wants out of Denver and that he's eyeing New York, New Jersey and Houston as potential trade destinations.

Of course, nothing is certain yet...and this saga could drag out well into next summer (the deadline for Anthony to sign an extension is June 30, 2011). And according to the Denver Post, 'Melo's being totally chill about this:

"I'm just taking my time with it. Obviously, everybody knows I'm loyal to the Denver Nuggets community and to the Denver Nuggets. I've shown that over my seven-year stint here. I don't think anybody can question that. But at this point in time I have to do what's best for me and my family. I'm just taking my time, figuring out if I want to take that extension or not."

Loyalty is a word that gets thrown around an awful lot by athletes...usually right before they mention the welfare of their family. And you know what that means. To wit, let's harken back to what LeBron had to say right before he rammed a knife in the back of every Cavaliers fan both living and dead:

This is tough. This is very tough, because you feel like you've let a lot of people down. You've raised a lot of people's expectations also. But it was a tough decision, because I know how loyal I am.

And one thing my mother told me when I was going through this process and what ultimately helped me make my decision is you have to do what's best for you and what's going to make you happy at the end of the day, because no one can live with the consequences or anything that comes with your decision besides you.

And once I heard that from my mother, the person that I always look to for guidance, [the decision to leave Cleveland] was easy.

Mind you, this was after he said "I never wanted to leave Cleveland. And my heart will always be around that area." So...yeah.

All I can say in response to all this loyalty talk is:

Labels: Carmelo Anthony, player loyalty

Denver Nuggets defense: The Charlotte Bobcats are 20th in the league in scoring (95.4 PPG), but Denver let them score 119 points. That's the most points the Bobcats have scored since late last season, when they dropped 122 on the Wizards. Memo to the Nuggets: If you want to be legit, you can't let teams like Charlotte score 119 points on you. Still, despite all that, Denver would have won the game if not for...

Carmelo Anthony: With 9.5 seconds left and the Nuggets trailing 117-115, 'Melo went to the line with a chance to tie the game. He made the first free throw, but clunked the second. Still, Anthony did manage to snag a deflected rebound...then shuffled his feet. Tweet! Game over. Said Anthony after the game: ""I probably did travel. I didn't think they would call it, though."

Boston Celtics: Wow. Going into this game, the Celtics had already lost two of three, including a home game against the Bobcats. And after losing to the Wizards in Washington on Saturday, I bet a lot of people were forecasting a little Boston payback last night. Only, oddly enougn, it was the Wizards who got payback for the way they got spanked in the C's home opener. But it's not the fact that the Celtics lost that's alarming -- every team loses winnable games here and there -- it's the way they lost. Boston was leading 77-63 with 6:24 left to play but got outscored 25-6 the rest of the way. The Celtics had their chances in the final minute, but Garnett missed a three-pointer and then clanked a turnaround jumper, and Ray Allen came up way short on a three on what turned out to be the Celtics final meaningful possession. When you have not one, not two, but three superstars on your team, you should really be able to hold onto a double-digit lead in the fourth quarter at home against a lesser team.

One note on Boston's "failure": The Celtics played the first 30 or so games like they were playoff games. That's the kind of intensity and determination that the Garnett, Pierce, and Allen were bringing to each and every game. So, really, it's not surprising that there's been a little bit of a letdown. It's hard to maintain that degree of focus and concentration over the course of an 82-game season. Especially when you consider that these guys had never even played together before (All-Star Games don't count). The team looks a little gassed right now, probably because they've been playing basketball like their lives depended on it for the last three months or so. They'll recover.

Caron Butler: I love his scrappy play, I love the way he's helped rally the Wizards to a 20-16 record without Gilbert Arenas, and I really love his crazy nickname ("Tough Juice"). But I'm not sure what to make of his post-kicking-Boston's-ass comments: "Our eyes are on winning a championship." You know, I expect a certain amount of absurd confidence from professional athletes. And yeah, the Wizards have played way better than anybody thought they could, minus their superstar leader. But, that said, and the back-to-back victories against Boston aside, does anybody think the Wizards have what it takes to win a championship this season? Or even make it to the Eastern Conference Finals? I mean, it's great to dream and all, but come on. Oh well, like Ricky Bobby said, "If yer not first, yer last."

New Jersey Nets: I know the Blazers have been on fire lately, but that doesn't explain why the Nets just laid down and died at home. They only scored 12 points in the first quarter and 73 points in the game. The team shot 33 percent (26-for-77), and effort "led" by the Nets' Big Three of Jason Kidd, Vince Carter, and Richard Jefferson, who shot a combined 7-for-33. This team should be so much better than it is.

Gordan Giricek: That's two straight DNP-CDs. Yeah, I know he wasn't happy on the Jazz, but you really have to be careful what you wish for in this league.

Bruce Bowen: He was 1-for-8 last night, and he's 4-for-27 over his last five games (including 2-for-16 from three-point range). Granted, the Spurs don't count on him for scoring, but hitting a shot now and then sure would help their cause.

Milwaukee Bucks: The Bucks shot 57 percent through the first three quarters, then nearly got blanked in the fourth. They ended up shooting 2-for-18 in the fourth quarter, after going the first seven-plus minutes without a field goal. And I know it sort of goes without saying, but they coughed up the lead, and the game, to the Jazz.

Kevin Durant: When he looks back to his team's 2-point overtime loss to the Lakers, I hope he realizes that his 6-for-26 shooting performance is what doomed his team.

Kobe Bryant: Yes, he led his team to victory by scoring 48 points...on 44 shot attempts. With 2 assists. Now that Bynum's out for a couple months, could this be the return of the last season's Kobe? I kinda hope so.

Dallas Mavericks defense: The Mavs were great offensively: 120 points, 57 percent shooting, 28 assists. Too bad they gave up 122 points. To the Kings. Kevin Martin, who hasn't played basketball in six weeks, scored 39 points (14-for-16) in just under 28 minutes. Said Avery Johnson: "We are not going to win many games giving up 122 points." I guess that's why he's the coach.

DeSagana Diop: In a game in which the two teams combined for 242 points on 164 shot attempts, Diop contributed...5 fouls in 5 minutes of "action." He is not making Senegal proud. [Thanks to Bob for the heads up.]

Labels: Boston Celtics, Bruce Bowen, Carmelo Anthony, Caron Butler, Dallas Mavericks, Denver Nuggets, Gordon Giricek, Kevin Durant, Kobe Bryant, Milwaukee Bucks, New Jersey Nets

The waking nightmare continues...
Knicks / Celtics: Several hours before the tipoff of last night's game, Isiah Thomas expressed his deep and soulful feelings for the Green and White: "I have a great respect for Boston, a very healthy respect. But I don't like them. I don't like the Celtics. Because they were always good. And they're good again. So my hatred is that much more." How very Dark Lord Sauron of him.

Is there a stronger feeling than hate? Because if there is, Isiah must be feeling it today after the Celtics' pitiless butchering of his Knicks. Man, oh man. I haven't seen a beating that savage, that brutal, since the El Mozote Massacre or maybe Bambi versus Godzilla. Shouldn't there be a slaughter rule for games like this, or at least a safeword that teams can use when they've had enough? Now, I likes me a good beatdown as much as the next guy who hates the Knicks and absolutely despises Isiah Thomas. But sitting through that game was like watching the scene in Reservoir Dogs where Mr. Blond tortures that cop and then cuts his ear off. Repulsive, disturbing, and yet too sickly fascinating for me to look away.

What went wrong for the Knicks? Well, for one thing, their starting point guard had only 1 assist and three turnovers. Their "Twin Towers" of Eddy Curry and Zach Randolph combined to score 8 points on 3-21 shooting, and that was their strongest contribution. Quentin Richardson alone out-rebounded them (9 to 6) and little Freddy Jones out-blocked them (2 to zero). As a team, the Knicks shot 30 percent (23-76). Their quarter-by-quarter scoring was as follows: 16, 15, 10, 18. And they needed a 37-foot heave by Nate Robinson at the final buzzer just to reach 59 and thus avoid their lowest point total in the Shot Clock Era (which was 58 on December 15, 2000, against the Utah Jazz).

Never one to blame himself, Isiah was quick to point his wicked Finger of Judgement at his hapless team, complaining that the Knicks' first-half performance was "the most selfish" he had ever seen by a team. "I thought every single player was thinking about himself, as opposed to thinking about the team." After that inspiring halftime speech, the Knicks went out and scored 10 points in the third quarter. That's some coaching genius there, Isiah.

What's happening with the Knicks is just terrible, and I don't even like the Knicks. It's getting to the point that I'd even feel sorry for Kobe Bryant if he was a Knick. Okay, not really, but just the fact that I was able to type those words without vomiting really says something. It's just...just...gaaagh.

And here's the thing: The Celtics didn't really play all that well. I know that sounds crazy, but if you actually watched the game, you know it's true. I mean, Kevin Garnett took five shots. Brian Scalabrine played 22 minutes, and Glen "Big Baby" Davis played a team-high 30. Need I say more? Look, Fay Wray put up more of a fight when King Kong carried her to the top of the Empire State Building. Which begs the question: Have the Knicks quit on Isiah? Seriously, who freaking knows with this dysfunctional band of misfits.

Fun fact: Fred Jones has 5 blocks on the season. Zach Randolph has 1.

Raiders of the Lost Statistics: At the end of the game, Rajon Rondo chose to dribble out 24 of the final 26 seconds, committing a shot clock violation and giving the ball back to the Knicks rather than going for a 50-point win. That's a turnover, right? Well, apparently not, because every box score I checked -- ESPN, Yahoo, even the official NBA box score -- showed Rondo as having zero turnovers on the night. It makes you wonder, do the NBA's official statisticians give out mulligans for mercy plays like that? Does that ever happen when a player attempts a full or half-court heave at the end of a quarter or before halftime? Speaking of which, I've always felt there should be an official stat category for those meaningless, desperation shots so they don't count against a player's normal shooting percentages. Plus, it would be downright interesting to look at Lebron James' season stats and find out he was 3-for-25 on desperation shots. There should also be a special category of statistic that tells you how many games a team gives up at the end of the season. Like, the Spurs might win 61 games but still end the season on a 4-game losing streak because Gregg Popovich was resting Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, and Manu Ginobili. I mean, wouldn't you like to know that stuff?

Nuggets / Lakers: This game was proof of how much homecourt advantage means in the NBA. With little more than a half-hearted effort, Denver built a 12-point lead after the first quarter and yet ultimately lost by 28 points. Again, if you watched the game you could tell that the Nuggets just didn't bring it. The Lakers had way more energy; they were grabbing offensive rebounds (they had 17 on the night, six above their average), coming up with loose balls, drawing charges. In short, making all the hustle plays that win games. And Denver? They just gave up. How else do you explain them getting outscored 46-24 in the fourth quarter?

There was at least one Nugget who was fired up, though: Carmelo Anthony. He scored 23 points (11-15) and even had a couple steals before getting ejected with 6:18 remaining for giving Sasha Vujacic a chop block to the throat away from the ball. Anthony claims it wasn't intentional (but it was) and that Vujacic drew attention to the foul by flopping (which he did, laughably so). Said Vujacic: "I think I've got to give him a DVD of European soccer. Then he can really see flops. I think it was frustration on his part. He's one of the best players in the league. But we did an amazing job on defense against him by double-teaming him -- and that's why he tried to choke me. I was surprised that he grabbed me with his hand." Ha, ha, yeah, you go ahead and try to give Carmelo a soccer DVD and you'll probably get choked again. Or at the very least he'll bitchslap you from behind and then run away. Anyway, Kobe Bryant -- who totally travelled on a spectacular up-and-under in the third quarter -- didn't comment on the play, probably because of all the times he wanted to strangle Sasha.

Fun fact: I don't really have much to say about Golden State's over-the-knee spanking of Houston, except that our good buddy Austin Croshere won the Second (to the Knicks) Biggest Loser of the Night Award for posting an ultra-rare two trillion. Third Biggest Loser of the Night goes to Yao Ming, who got shut down by Al Harrington despite a 9-inch, 60-pound physical advantage.

Big Stinky Jerkface of the Night: That's right, I'm talking to you, NFL. Hey, let's put a marquee matchup between two 10-1 teams on the NFL network, which is like telling 99.9 percent of the world "Nyah, nyah, you can't watch this!" Great idea, NFL. Well, the Football Gods took their revenge for your hubris, striking down Brett Favre who -- according to your jersey sales -- is the most popular player in the league. Did you get the message? Or is it going to take a well-aimed lightning bolt to the testicles to teach you the error of your ways? Oh, and Brett's my fantasy QB, so thanks for costing me this week's game and officially eliminating me from playoff contention. [FlohtingPoint reminded me to mention this travesty.]

Labels: Austin Croshere, beatdowns, Boston Celtics, Carmelo Anthony, Denver Nuggets, homecourt advantage, Isiah Thomas, Los Angeles Lakers, New York Knicks, statistics, Yao Ming