It's like some kind of crazy combination of performance art and man love
Before we get started with BAD, I'd like to extend a get-well-soon wish to George Karl as he gets ready to fight another round of cancer. While it is thankfully fairly treatable, cancer is still a horrible, scary, life-altering ordeal, and I hope he gets through it as best as possible.
While I didn't have time to go back and do a Worst of the Night today, I HAVE been able to research plenty of trade rumors to make fun of while my Twitter page in the background constantly updates with more and more trade deadline talk.
Bad Trade of the Day: I'm not going to bother sharing a fake trade today. Instead, I'm going to just remind of you of the possible real-life trades that could go down before tomorrow's trade deadline strikes at 3pm ET. Here are some of the big rumors (ignoring less interesting stuff like Bad Porn Maggette or Troy Murphy going to Cleveland)...
-Cleveland is the front-runner for Amar''''e Stoudemire, offering up Zydrunas Ilgauskas and JJ Hickson. Miami is said to be the other major player (which I'm sure Amar'''''e loves since he already lives part-time in Miami), but they don't seem to be willing to pay the price. They have yet to offer up Michael Beasley or any top draft picks. Then again, it's not like they have anything to offer. The Heat are D-Wade and a bunch of homeless people picked off the street to serve as his teammates. All I know is the Suns are apparently fairly serious about getting rid of Amar''''e, and that's a good thing since Amar''''e doesn't exactly feel wanted there. He has enough trouble playing with indifference as is. If he stays in Phoenix, he'll manage to give even less of a shit.
-The Bullets are in full rebuilding mode (as if they had any other options). They are apparently willing to deal Antawn Jamison in efforts to save some cash and avoid the luxury tax. The Crabs have shown interest (Jamison and Mike James for Big Z and Jamario Moon was one offer), but this one isn't looking very likely yet. I guess the Bullets are looking to acquire even more Null-Stars and probably are demanding Lacktion Brothers Darnell and Cedric Jackson are included in the swap.
-Knee-Mac trades are still a big story, despite the serious issue that, well, Knee-Mac sucks. He's been washed up for a couple years thanks to a deadly combination of old age, injuries, and being Tracy McGrady. (I mean, he's the cousin of Vinsanity. What do you really expect?) The Bricks are the biggest destination I've heard, but also the Bulls have been thrown out there. I would look deeper into it, but, eh.
-Finally, according to Chad Ford, "The Timberwolves also inquired about a possible Darko Milicic-for-Brian Cardinal deal." Holy shit, I love the NBA so much. The NBA -- Where Trading Null-Stars Happens.
"Dunleavy was a guest on the Fox Sports West broadcast of the Blazers vs. Clippers, and used the airtime to intimate that it's conceivable he just pulled off an amazingly lopsided trade -- because Camby could return to the Clippers as a free agent this summer."
Of course, the downfall to this plan is that Camby won't be much use next season after his stint with the Frail Blazers turns his knees into a mess of ripped cartilage and bone fragments.
Worst of the Night in Pictures:
Get the hell out of Phoenix, Amar''''e. (And put on your glasses so the door doesn't detach your retina on the way out!)
Nice to see things are back to normal in Philly
"Hmm... I wonder what team I can hop to for my next one-year coaching stint..."
"Very nice, Yi! Good job pretending that guy was a chair!"
This is the look of a 33 point loss
I swear, AK47 gets scarier looking every single day
Suck it, Nate Robinson, Gerald Wallace, Shannon Brown, Eric Gordon, and DeMar DeRozan
"Alright, who said I looked like Stan Van Gundy's dad??"
Nationally Televised Games: Suns at Mavericks: This is just unfair. How are the Mavs supposed to stop Jared Dudley and his historically athletic hands?
All The Other Games: Spurs at Pacers: Mike Dunleavy Jr. told the Pacers website "You can't worry about the playoffs." That's probably a good idea when you're 18-34. If you dwell on that, you'd better have the suicide hotline on speed dial.
Pistons at Magic: During the All-Star weekend, Dwight Howard set a Guinness record for the longest basketball shot made while sitting. Now, if only the Pumaman could figure out how to hit a jumper or execute anything resembling a post move...
Timberwolves at WizardsGenerals Bullets: The Bullets are just one or two trades away from recreating the Eastern Conference Null-Stars in real life. There is no other reason to watch this game.
Grizzlies at Raptors: Toronto may no longer be the Craptors, but they are still averaging 104.6 PPG and 104.9 points against per game, and somehow have a 29-23 record. Mind-boggling.
Bulls at Bricks: Come on, New York. You've only got this one last chance to dump salary in ludicrous, season-killing trades. Do it! You can't hilariously screw up the LeBron/Bosh/Wade sweepstakes if you don't dump salary first!
Jazz at Hornets: Utah's won four straight road games. However, you know how we feel about the second night of a back-to-back, especially when those games are both on the road.
Rockets at Bucks: It seems like so long ago when Brandon Jennings was a manbeast, doesn't it? I don't understand. How could the epic high top fade haircut be working against him? It doesn't make any sense. It worked so well for Kid 'n' Play's career longevity!
Kings at Warriors: I'm just going to let Excremento Kings rookie Omri Casspi explain just how much of a trainwreck this team is right now by summarizing last night's game: "It was tough. I even made a free throw I tried to miss." That is, indeed, tough. You fail at failing, Omri.
Hawks at Clippers: Now, come on. How are the Hawks supposed to stop the newly-acquired powerhouse duo of Steve Blake and the kinda sorta injured Travis Outlaw?
WF: taser. Hehe.
Just leaving our Breakfast Meeting. "I'm still here" Lol. It's time for a hair cut. Got to stay fresh during this trade talk. Lol.
Too many uncomfortable Internet "Lol"s, I think we all know what that means.
(word verification: enver as in Denver without the D)
hahahaha...it happened! Null-Star trades rock!
And Super-GM Dunleavy's current tally is:
Out: Marcus Camby, Sebastian Telfair, Al Thornton, Brian Skinner.
In: Drew Gooden, Steve Blake, Travis Outlaw, money.
As a Blazer fan, I have to say "thank you". Still doesn't make up for 2000 though.
All I need to do is see if Tyrus Thomas ends up somewhere that will put him in the starting lineup. Mmm.
"And Jason Richardson breaks the seal on this one tonight"
2. Houston beat Milwaukee 127-99. They outscored the Bucks 80-46 in the middle quarters (43-14 in the 3rd alone). Trevor Ariza, Shane Battier, and Aaron Brooks combined to shoot 15-19 from 3.
wv: payoty- Maybe Duncan's night can be attributed to payoty.
The Kings were down by only one after the first quarter. No big deal in the house of Nellieball, right?
In the next period of play, the East Oaklanders dropped FORTY TWO POINTS on the same team that did a much better job defending the creaky knees of Garnett and co. a night before. The paupers were outscored in that quarter by a full 26 points - almost as many as they had scored on their own in the first!
Knee-Mac arrives in Sactown while K-Mart will be offering Blue Light Special coupons to Clutch The bear!!!!
CAPTCHA: "aughthe," as in "Aughthe paupers picking up someone less fragile than peanut brittle?"
THE BULLETS GET BRIAN SKINNER, INCREASING THEIR NULL-STAR QUOTIENT!!!!!
Bassy Telfair to the Bullets.
The jokes write themselves don't they?
Nobody's sure yet if Knee-Mac's existence as a purple pauper on paper will last more than 10 hours (or if he is slated to become the next overpaid sideshow at MSG).
But Chris, you must probably be happy about getting Landry. Very surprising that Houston gave him up.
They would have been better off making the trade with NY or Chicago for expiring contracts and cap relief, imo.
Having said that, if he can play with half the competitive fire that Tyreke The Freak does, we may just be okay after all.
K-Mart may have been "all class" and "quietly minding his business" as a one-dimensional scorer, but is that really enough to take a team out of rebuilding mode?
Well, we even have the Tyreke haters showing up!
I just want to see Kev succeed and give the big FU to the Kings and Tyreke,,, after reading Tyrekes BS excuses for how the team played last night… that it was becuase of the trade rumors… and hopefully they can get back to playing the way they have been,,, WTF? They have been playing like shit while Reke gets his points!! Expected… after all he is already HOF material in his mind and in Team Tyreke’s mind…
Uh, I'm not sure "wanting to actually get back to winning" equates to "thinking you're a hall of famer at 20 years old," but I digress.
Concerning the Houston-Sactown deal I don't really understand how they decided to part with Carl Landry. When scoring is their big issue, how does trading the league-leading 4th quarter scorer help (broadcaster statement, no idea how to check that)? He also seemed to fit well into the scrappy Rockets.
Let's see how that works out for both teams.
Landry by himself probably won't solve Sacramento's rebounding woes (he is a decent, not great rebounder) but believe me he will give the Kings a much, much needed injection of toughness and badassitude. He is also already their best option in the post (as much as I like Spencer Hawes skillset he is slow off his feet and wildly inconsistent) and rest assured you will love having him there either as a starter or 6-7th man. You also get to save a ton of money and get rid of a guy who was largely ineffectual in your new system and seemingly incompatible with your rookie stud.
Now if only you guys could get a Steve Blake type point guard and finally switch Tyreke over to the 2 permanently...