Seriously, doesn't it look like Doug Collins ispimping Ronnie Price out to some dirty old man?
The Washington Wizards: Sure, it would be easy to give the Wizards a mulligan on this one. I mean, the defending champs are on a hot streak -- 13 in a row and counting -- so losing to them was sort of expected. That said...the Wiz lost by 34. At home. They shot 43 percent and had more turnovers (22) than assists (16). Meanwhile, Boston singed their forearm hair off with 56 percent shooting (and 53 percent from distance) and beat them bloody on the boards (41-26). The Celtics also had seven players in double figures, and Big Baby almost had a double-double (9 points, 7 rebounds). Brian Scalabrine played most of the fourth quarter.

Remember: This is, essentially, the same Washington team that showed so much spunk last year. They were, in fact, the only team in the league to beat the Celtics three times during the regular season. And now? The Wiz are 4-16, which matches the 1966-67 Baltimore Bullets for the worst start in franchise history. That's some historic fail right there.


Mind you, I almost mentioned the Wizards in yesterday's Worst of the Night because they traded FOR Mike James, the shoot-first point guard whom Byron Scott didn't trust to play the three or four minutes a game that Chris Paul sits out. The so-called Amityville Scorer, who's something of a homeless man's Gilbert Arenas, played 10 minutes, shot 0-for-6, and finished with a point, an assist, a steal and a foul. But I'm sure he just needs time to adjust to Ed Tapscott's system. That and some kind of magic potion that can transform him into a real NBA player. Oh, and here's a bonus picture of James getting the ball knocked away by Big Baby. That's right: James has regressed to the point where he isn't faster and more mobile than Glen Davis.

I know there's a lot of Big Baby to get around,Mike, but you should still be able to do it.
Speaking of that trade, TehJay pointed out that Javaris Crittenton played 6 minutes last night, contributing 4 turnovers and nothing else. Added TehJay: "Washington got a steal with this trade!"

Also, here's a question for the Basketbawful faithful: Are the Cavs, Celtics and Lakers just incredibly awesome or does the rest of the league just kinda suck this season? I'm leaning toward the latter. Discuss.

Brian Scalabrine: Here's a gold nugget from the AP game notes: "Rivers put in the players at the end of his bench for most of the fourth quarter, and what was left of the sellout crowd of 20,173 kept chanting reserve forward Brian Scalabrine's last name, apparently hoping to see him score, or at least shoot. He put up his one and only attempt with 3 seconds left -- and it was blocked." I promise you I'm not ghost writing for the AP under the pseudonym "Howard Fendrich." As far as you know. For the record, it was JaVale McGee who decided to ego-ectomize Scal on that final play. It's just like John Kreese said: We do not train to be merciful here. Mercy is for the weak. A man confronts you, he is the enemy. An enemy deserves no mercy.

Here's another bonus pic. The caption: "Brian Scalabrine of the Boston Celtics plays a game with a child from Boston Medical Center during a Boston Celtics Holiday Party on December 9, 2008 at the Dick's Last Resort in Boston, Massachusetts." Have you ever seen someone look so bewildered during a game of Jenga?

Jeez, Brian. It's Jenga, not rocket science.
The Dallas Mavericks: They barely held off the Bobcats in Dallas. Woo hoo! Yes, that's sarcasm. Worse is that Charlotte was missing Gerald Wallace (who has not returned to the team following the death of his grandmother) and just traded away their leading scorer, therefore they were playing with a bench so short that Adam Morrison logged 20 minutes...and scored 9 points on 4-for-6 shooting. I'm not going to bother to check, but I'm guessing that's a season-high for the 'Stache. Said 'Cats coach Larry Brown: "We played a lot of guys who've never really played before." Which, of course, is Larry's passive-aggressive way of mocking the Mavs while making excuses for his team. That's what coaching experience is all about, baby.

Countered Mavericks coach Rick Carlisle: "It was about defense tonight. They're a difficult team because they're very persistent." Really, Rick? Really? So persistent they rank dead last in PPG (89.8) and darn close in field goal percentage (43.7). Although I suppose I should credit Dallas for holding them to only 0.2 points above their scoring average. That's something.

DeSagana Diop: The Mavs sure are lucky they managed to resign Diop last summer! I got into some pretty heated arguments with some commenters last year when Diop was included as an add-on in the Jason Kidd trade. My stance: He's a nearly useless, seven-foot stiff. My opponents' stance: He's an invaluable rebounding and defensive presence. Well, his performance this season has been a little thing I like to call "checkmate." Last night's line: 3 minutes, 2 fouls, and a suck differential of +2. By the way, that contract he signed? It's worth more than $32 million over five years. So, in considering Diop's free agent deal, the Harris-for-Kidd trade and the fact that the Mavs chose to give Erick Dampier a seven-year, $72 million contract instead of re-signing Steve Nash...can we all just agree once and for all that Mark Cuban isn't quite the genius he thinks he is and leave it at that?

Emeka Okafor: The Okafor watch continues! Oaky had a season-high 27 points and 17 rebounds. And zero assists. Again. That's another 41 minutes without a dime. The current season numbers stand at: 781 minutes, 195 field goal attempts, 98 free throw attempts, 48 turnovers and 7 assists in 23 games. And since his season-high is 1 assist, that means he's played 16 games without one. To which I say: Damn, dawg. You're not even letting the GROUND touch the ball. [Opens Okafor's closet and watches in stunned silence as thousands of balls spill out.]

Matt Harpring's defense: C'mon, Matt. I'm pretty sure that's against some sort of rule...

Memo to Matt: It's "hand in the face," not "fistful of jersey."
Deron Williams' shooting: "Dear, Deron. Including last night's 5-for-16 shooting performance, you're now hitting 37 percent of your field goals on the season. This is killing my fantasy team. Please put in some extra practice or take better shots. Thank you in advance. Sincerely, Basketbawful."

The Portland Trail Blazers: Hm. They've quietly lost three of four, and it would be four in a row if not for Steve Blake's three with 8 seconds left against the Raptors. I'm just sayin'. Meanwhile, what's up with this quote from Brandon Roy? "They did a great job and we've got to give them all the credit, but now it's our turn when we face them again to protect our home court." When I read that, I figured maybe they had a home-and-home with the Jazz. Nope. They don't face the Jazz in Portland until January 31st. I wonder if there was some trash talk going on during the game. But be careful what you wish for, Brandon. Utah should have Carlos Boozer back by then, so I'm guessing they'll be a little tougher.

Update! Brandon Roy: Not sure how I missed this, but Ben did not: "Shouldn't Brandon Roy earn some malaprops for his Okafor last night? Sure he had 33 points on 12-22 shooting, but when your starting PG gets no dimes in nearly 43 minutes, your team's chances of winning are going to be just south of diddley-squat." Good point. Although, technically speaking, Steve Blake is the startin PG while Roy starts at the two-spot. But still, Roy averages 5 APG and a lot of the Blazers' offense goes through him...so, yeah, he gets a mention. But honestly, Ben, you had me at "malaprops."

Update! Kobe Bryant: He called Mo's Bar and said: "Uh, yeah, I'd like to speak to a Mr. Tabooger, first name Ollie."

Death: Bettie Page passed away last night. She was 85. She was an amazing woman who lived an amazing life. She really changed the world. I'm bummed.

Thanks for the memories, Bettie.

Labels: Boston Celtics, Brian Scalabrine, Charlotte Bobcats, Dallas Mavericks, DeSagana Diop, Emeka Okafor, Portland Trail Blazers, Utah Jazz, Washington Wizards

Note: The steaming portrait of man love displayed above was provided by J Men.

Darko Milicic: I was a little late getting to last night's games, and when I finally got to the computer I had two Darko-related emails. The first, from Brian S., said: "One minute, 24 seconds into the game, WHILE THE ANNOUNCERS ARE SAYING HOW WELL HE GUARDS YAO, Darko has committed 2 fouls and is now out of the game. He can't even do well during the 1 minute and 24 seconds people are talking nicely about him." This was almost immediately followed by a very excited email from Quinton A., which said: "DUDE!!!! MILICIC!!!! JERSEY!!!! Just coming out of halftime, Darko picked up his fourth foul gaurding Yao, which he responded to by promptly getting a tech then going to the bench and ripping his jersey straight down the middle, Serbian Superman style." Oh yes he most certainly did.


Darko finished with 5 points, 5 rebounds, 5 fouls, and two jersey halves in 10 minutes. Although Victor correctly pointed out that: "Poor Darko. That's 15 and 15 if you extrapolate to 30 minutes!" He only needed more time. Alas. Also, Trev provided the following graphic, which he found on SpursTalk.com: The Incredible Darko. You wouldn't like him when he's angry. Or, frankly, any other time.


The Houston Rockets: They were down 32-19 after one quarter. To the Memphis Grizzlies. From that point forward, it was an uphill battle...which they lost, mostly on the defensive end, where they gave up 51 percent shooting and 109 points while forcing only 6 turnovers (only one more than Dwyane Wade had by himself against the Bobcats).

Said Rockets coach Rick Adelman: "They were the aggressors all the way. They got the rebounds and got to the basket. They just outworked us. They came out much more aggressive to start the game." True enough.

Mind you, there were some circumstances. Ron Artest missed the game with a sore right foot. Tracy McGrady, of course, is still out with that sore left knee. Oh, and Brent Barry was in civvies due to a right leg injury. In total, the Rockets had only 10 players in uniform...including Steve Francis, who hasn't played all year but still managed to have his picture taken last night. Here it is:

Steve Francis: More jerseys chewed on (1) than minutes played (0) this season.
Luther Head: With all the missing peeps, Head got what was, for him, some extended PT last night (24 minutes). His response: 2 points on 1-for-8 shooting, an assist and a foul. Oh, and one of his shots was stuffed. Glad to see you making the most of the opportunity, Luther.

Jason Richardson: He led his team with 24 points and hit four of his five three-point attempts. Here's the "but": He missed two free throws that would have tied the game with 32.3 seconds left. Said J-Rich: "Anything could have happened had I made those free throws." True. Sort of like how I could be playing in the NBA right now...if I was Dwyane Wade. Or, to be fair, even if I was Mark Blount (who was 0-for-1 and finished with a rebound in just under three minutes of lack-tion last night).

I should also point out that, late in the game, with his team in the midst of six straight misses, Yakhouba Diawara covered Richardson like a 10-ton blanket, forcing him into an uuuuugly shot as the shot clock buzzed. And, uh, it didn't go in.

Emeka Okafor: Toll the bells! Throw some confetti! Emeka registered his 7th assist of the season last night! The numbers now read: 21 games started, 712 minutes played, 172 field goals attempted, 90 free throws attempted, 43 turnovers committed and 7 assists dished out. And, according to Basketball-Reference.com, Okafor easily has the fewest assists of any player who has logged at least 600 minutes this season. The next guy is Luc Mbah a Moute Jean Luc Richard, who has 20 assists in 602 minutes. He also has the lowest Assist Percentage -- which measures the percentage of teammate field goals assisted while on the court -- by a lot: Okafor is at 1.9 percent and the next guy, Udonis Haslem, is at 5.2 percent. (Haslem has 24 assists in 740 minutes.)

And Yinka Dare's soul rests peacefully.

Update! In the spirit of dissing Emeka, Murcy nominated last night's posterization by Dwyane Wade. Initially, I left this out because D-Wade has been posterizing the entire league lately. However, I changed my mind both because of how helpless Okafor looked during the play and because Murcy knows how to rock the pirate hook.


Daequan Cook: Got this email from Tom of Clutch City Hoops: "Daequan Cook: nine trillion. Killed my fantasy team." I don't know what mystifies me more: How Cook managed to do nothing in nine minutes of PT or why Tom has Daequan on his fantasy team.

Michael Beasley: My preseason pick for ROY had his second straight single-figure scoring game with 9 points on 4-for-13 shooting to go along with 6 rebounds and an assist. My contention that the Bulls should have taken Beasley over Rose is looking more laughable by the game. Speaking of Rose...

Derrick Rose: He didn't play yesterday (the Bulls had no game) and, in fact, he didn't practice either. Why, you ask? Because, as many of you have pointed out in comments, emails, and smoke signals, Rose cut himself under the elbow on his left forearm. In bed. From a knife he used to slice an apple. Said Rose: "Silly accident this morning. I went to get a bottle of water, forgot the knife was there and sat down and sliced my arm. I panicked when it first happened. I called [Bulls trainer Fred Tedeschi]. We got it stitched up about 8 [a.m.]. It was a large wound, but they healed it up. I'm good. I could have practiced, but they told me to wait until [today]. I can still dribble, shoot, do all that stuff. I'm hoping they'll let me play."

Of course, a lot of people are already questioning what "really" happened, since Rose's story sounds too bizarre to be true (kind of like the time I got run over by a horse while riding my bike). But, in my experience, it's the weird stories that totally ARE true. And Rose isn't worried about what other people think. "It's the truth, so I'm not worried about [people not believing him]. I called my mom, and she was like, what are you doing? It was just a freak accident. I was very scared. I'm going to get somebody else to cut [the apple]. I'm not cutting it no more." Ah, to live in a world where, after a freak apple-cutting accident, you can respond not by simply being more careful next time, but by hiring someone to peel apples for you for the rest of your life. Awesome.

Anyway, I will soon be adding this to my comprehensive list of stupid basketball injuries. I'm thinking it could be a Top 5er. Easily. Without question.

The Klahma City Thunder: Holy rusted metal, Batman. The Golden State Warriors, losers of nine straight games, stumbled into the Thunder's home arena without their two leading scorers -- Stephen Jackson (20.1 PPG) and Corey Maggette (19.1) both sat out with injuries -- and it didn't matter. They won anyway. The Thunder are just that bad. The Warriors played eight guys, seven of which scored in double figures...and the eighth guy, Ronny Turiaf, finished with 9. The Thunder were down by as many as 21 in the second quarter and by 19 at halftime. They tried to rally, but of course that rally came up short. Kevin Durant, who played great (41 points, 10 rebounds) against the Warriors non-defense, said: "In this league, when you get down by 20 it's hard to come back." Wow! His basketball IQ is off the charts!

Meanwhile, Golden State's sad season was best summed up by Don Nelson, who had this to say after his team beat the 2-20 Thunder: "We didn't win the world championship but it sure felt like it." And that's what we call "lowered expectations," folks.

Animal stylin': Basketbawful reader Josh wrote in about Dwight Howard using what will soon become a Word of the Day: "Dwight Howard sent the Los Angeles Clippers home with another L tonight courtesy of one of his patented "Double-Double Animal Styles": 23 points, 22 boards and for the F of it he tossed in 6 blocked shots. He's starting to make this routine..." You heard it here first, people. 20/20 aren't just MAN-type games, anymore. They're Animal Styles! Rowr! Speaking of the Clips...

The Los Angeles Clippers: Meh. They are who we thought they were.

Kobe Bryant: Mamba forced his daughters to sing a self-penned song until their little voices were hoarse and raspy. The lyrics? "Ko-BE, if I could BE Ko-BE! Gotta BE gotta BE Ko-BE! Ko-BE, if I could BE Ko-BE!"

Labels: Darko, Emeka Okafor, fan submissions, Houston Rockets, Jason Richardson, Oklahoma City Thunder, Steve Francis, Worst of the Night

The Washington Wizards: Well, they lost to the Portland Trail Blazers at home last night, which is no shame in and of itself. After all, in case you haven't noticed, the Blazers have quietly won six games in a row and accumulated a 14-6 record...second-best in the West and fifth overall in the league (behind the Celtics, Lakers, Cavaliers and Magic). Still, the loss dropped the Gandalfs to only 2-7 at home and an Eastern Conference worst 3-11. That's right: The Wiz are a full THREE games worse than the Charlotte Bobcats.

But, hey, at least they came within six points of the Blazers and were right there at the end. That's gotta count for something right? Or maybe not. Interim coach Ed Tapscott said: "Close only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades, you know?" Well, it also counts in nuke, gunshot wounds...okay, "close" is looking pretty scary, so I'll quit while I'm, uh, alive.

Brandon Roy, going-left machine: "My whole life, guys send me left. I come to the bench, and my teammates are joking, 'Oh, you went left.' I'm like, 'Which way did he give me? He gave me left.' You give me right, I'll take right. But right now they're giving me left, and I do whatever I can to make plays out there." Just so everybody knows: Brandon can score go left.

The Minnesota Timberwolves: Despite forcing 19 turnovers and a 42-31 rebounding edge -- including a 16-3 advantage on the offensive glass -- the Timberpups STILL suffered a double-digit loss to the Magic. Mostly 'cause Orlando shot a season-high 57 percent...despite the fact that their starting backcourt is still out with injuries. Memo to Minny: You have to do more than just hope the other team misses. Sometimes you actually have to participate in a little thing we call "hand in the face." It actually kinda works sometimes. But hey, I'm no expert. Go ahead and keep using the "wish defense" if you like.

Of course, Wolves coach Randy Wittman thinks his team's problem is on the offensive end of the floor. "Through three quarters we got great looks, we just couldn't put it in. You've got to score against this team." And that, Randy, is the kind of attitude that has helped your team earn the league's sixth-worst mark in field goal percentage defense (46.7) and the fifth-worst mark in three-point defense (37.8). You might want to consider leaving the "We'll just outscore the other team" strategy to Mike D'Antoni.

Brian Cardinal: The line: Seven minutes, 43 seconds and zero-for-everything...a near eight trillion. Ben Q. Rock of the Third Quarter Collapse said: "Probably the closest we'll ever see anyone come to Damon Jones' hallowed 12 trillion." Maybe, maybe not. After all, yesterday Basketbawful reader 747 left the following comment: "Though not as epic as the Damon Jones game, on April 2, 2002, my sister's birthday no less, Carlos Arroyo had a 12 trillion." So don't worry, Ben. There's always hope for greater trillions!

The Memphis Grizzlies: Remember how about a month ago the Grizzlies won a few games (two against the Warriors and one against the Kings) and everybody got all excited about how this team was "ahead of schedule" and all that. Okay, "excited" is a strong word, because anybody who can't be referred to as "mom," "dad" or "baby mama" by somebody affiliated with this team is medically incapable of being excited about them. But anyway, all that early optimism has [SHOCK ALERT!!] given way to 11 losses in their last 12 games, including the current 7-game streak of futility. But there's good news: Two of the baby bears' next four games are against the Clippers and the Thunder, and I'm going to go way out on a limb and predict they go at least .500 in those two games. You heard it here first.

Darko Milicic: Nothing's really changed. Darko continues to be one of the most disappointing second overall picks of the last, well, forever. But here's an update anyway: The Dark One played 19 minutes last night, shooting 0-for-1 and finishing with more fouls (4) than rebounds (3) or points (2). He was 2-for-2 from the foul line, though. Just so you understand I can sometimes see that the glass is half full. Of crap.

Maurice Evans: No points in 16 minutes is kind of embarrassing...but shooting 0-for-7 (including 0-for-5 from downtown) is downright shameful. Shame, Maurice! Shame! And I've got a rolled up newspaper with your name on it.

Mario West: Lived up to his name by putting in a 19-second Mario. ADORABLE SAD FACE.

The Klahma City Thunder: Better grab hold of those socks so they don't blow off your feet, but the Thunder showed actual signs of offense last night: The NBA's worst shooting team (at 42.4 percent) blistered the Bobcats with 54 percent sniping. And yet still managed to lose. They are now a league-worst 2-17.

Continuing on with the "glass half full of crap" theme, Kevin Durant said: "Tonight was better than most losses because we did some things well." Huh. Maybe, for the mental health of everybody in the Thunder franchise, the NBA should add a new column in the season standings for "Losses That Are Better Than Most."

Matt Carroll: A big tip of the hat goes out to Carroll, whose 13-second Mario for the Bobcats should make Mario West feel less like a complete human failure and more like an only almost-complete human failure. [Basketbawful realizes Mario West is making $700,000 this season while Matt Carroll is making over $5,000,000...then weeps silently to himself.]

Emeka Okafor: I know what you're saying: Basketbawful, how can you possibly bust on a guy coming off his best two games of the season? (Emeka scored 25 points on 8-for-11 shooting and snared 13 boards last night, while on Monday he scored 24 on 9-for-14 from the field and grabbed 10 rebounds.) Well, it's because Basketbawful reader Jacob C sent me the following email after Monday's game: "Are you aware that this man has played 569 minutes this year and has 6 assists? How can those be real numbers? That is only 6 assists more than I have on the season. That's one assist every 90 minutes. I'm pretty sure that those can't be real numbers. Don't you accidentally pick up more assists than that? I realize those 'Cats are not good but that is completely absurd."

True enough, and it only got more absurd last night when Okafor played another 38 minutes without registering an assist. So, the numbers are: 607 minutes, 141 shot attempts, 36 turnovers and only 6 assists.

I relayed this information to my buddy Statbuster last night, and he said, "Wow. Those numbers make Kevin McHale look like John Stockton. Or they make Yinka Dare look like Kevin McHale." (Dare, you may remember, was named Basketbawful's Worst Passer Ever for playing 1,002 minutes in 110 games over a four-year career and dishing out only four assists.) Good times. I guess his given name, "Chukwuemeka," is Nigerian for "Doesn't pass."

Michael Jordan, the concerned owner: Sean May, who had his best game of the season last night (10 points, 11 rebounds), was taken out of last night's game during the third quarter because of extreme out-of-breathness. Fortunately, part-owner Michael Jordan was there to mock him: "Mike said, 'Do you need an oxygen mask?'" May said. "I said, 'No, just give me a couple minutes and I'll be fine.'" I'm surprised MJ didn't ask if May needed a bra for his man-boobage.

The New York Knicks: What can you say about a 36-point drubbing in which Quentin Richardson got himself ejected and Chris Duhon (1-for-9, 4 assists, 6 turnovers) played less like Steve Nash and more like, well, Chris Duhon? If you're Mike D'Antoni, I guess you can talk about how tired your team is. Said D'Antoni: "This is the thing you run into when you run into a good team without any gas in your tank and it showed. Things just unraveled. I think everyone was frustrated. I think you get frustrated when you're tired." You know what else is frustrating? When you suck.

Update! Man love in Cleveland: Basketbawful reader Edgar C found this on TrueHoop: "After the game nearly the entire Cavs team stayed in the shower area for an hour. They were leaning against walls, sitting on counters and enjoying adult beverages all in towels. They were talking, making fun of each other, hanging out. It may seem like normal locker room behavior, but it isn't. Maybe these guys go hang out with each other in groups after the games at restaurants or their houses. But in my six years covering the Cavs I'd never seen that after a game. The season is long, trying times are certainly ahead, but the team is more than just winning, they are enjoying doing it with each other." And the title of the article this came from? "Cavs enjoying each others' company." Oh yes it is. According to preliminary estimates, this event ranked just after Clay Aiken on the Gay Scale.

The Philadelphia crowd: So far this season they've ignored their team, and booed their team, and last night they cheered and chanted "M-V-P!" for longtime Philly villain Kobe Bryant. Ah, sweet Philadelphia, providing the Sixers all the comforts of playing on the road. Of course, it might have helped if their team hadn't let the Lakers shoot 58 percent and beat them by double digits. More details from Wild Yams: "Speaking of Philly, and since you mentioned their crowd chanting 'MVP' for Kobe last night, it should be pointed out that at the start of the game they were loudly booing him every time he touched the ball, and it was only at the end of the game when the Lakers had it in hand and Kobe went off for a couple playground type moves that they started cheering for him. Fickle Philly fans."

Update! Elton Brand: I overlooked this, but Wild Yams didn't: "I'm surprised to see Elton Brand didn't make this list, what with going 1-7 for 3 points in 25 minutes last night. Money well spent there, Philadelphia." Yams, are you suggesting that's not $80 million worth of production?

Ed Stefanski: Philly's team president said before the game that he isn't surprised the Sixers are struggling to adjust to the new roles necessitated by Elton Brand's arrival. But then he indicated heads might be on the chopping block if they don't start adjusting, and pronto. "You'll never hear patience come out of my mouth." So yeah, he expected them to have problems, but he won't stand for them having problems. More Leadership 101.

Phil Jackson, Super Obvious Man: "If Kobe shoots the ball that well, we're going to have a good winning percentage because he's going to take most of the shots." In other news, if you don't drink Drain-O, you won't die from drinking Drain-O.

The Indiana Pacers: A night after their inspirational and hope-lifting win over the Lakers, they lost by 18 to the Celtics in Boston. So, you know, it seems unlikely that the road to this year's championship will be running through Indianapolis.

Kevin Garnett, hyperbole machine: Regarding teammate Rajon Rondo, who notched a triple double by scoring 16 points, grabbing 13 rebounds and dishing out a career-high 17 assists: "He was amazing. It was like there was three Rondos. I looked up and it came off the rim and he is grabbing a rebound, then I got back on defense and he beat me back. He was everywhere tonight." Garnett then looked down at his pants only to see Rondo's head pop out from the open zipper, proving that Rajon was, indeed, everywhere.

The Chicago Bulls: Forget the fact that they got only one home game after their circus trip before being forced to hit the road again...no team should let Dan Gadzuric (11 points, 14 rebounds, 3 blocked shots) control the paint. Unless you're the Chicago Wheelchair Bulls or something. And even then I'd expect maybe half as many rebounds.

The Milwaukee Bucks: Sure, they beat the Bulls, but according to Forbes, they're the least valuable NBA franchise at $278 million. Chicago is the third-most valuable at $504 million. Suck it, Milwaukee!

The "Phoenix Suns": The "Suns" played without Steve Nash (flu-like symptoms!) and Shaq (resting his weary flab). As a result, the Suns were outrebounded 46-30 (including a season-high 17 offensive rebounds for the Hornets) and outscored by 104-91. But that'll happen when Robin Lopez is your starting center.

Update! Amare Stoudemire: One more addition from Wild Yams: "How does Amare Stoudemire manage to get only 4 rebounds last night when he's only competing with Robin Lopez for boards? When your supposed MVP candidate at power forward has more fouls (5) and turnovers (6) than rebounds, something isn't right. Actually, I should just criticize the entire Phoenix frontcourt for their lack of rebounding last night. Stoudemire, Boris Diaw and Robin Lopez combined for 8 total rebounds in a combined 86 minutes of PT. Matt Barnes off the bench had 7 by himself in 32 minutes of play."

Goran Dragic: He registered a DNP-CD despite the fact that Nash was absent. Wow. How did the Suns not know he was this bad when they signed him?

The Los Angeles Clippers: Now 3-15 and thanking God that the Klama City Thunder are around to distract the world from how truly awful they are. But at least they were competitive. So, you know, put last night's loss to the Rockets in "Losses That Are Better Than Most" column. Particularly since Houston was +23 in FTAs. (What's that smell, you ask? Home cookin'!)

Baron Davis, sick machine: B-Diddy had to sit down for a spell in the first quarter due to what was apparently food poisoning. Said David: "I must have ate something before the game and it didn't want to come down or out." Gah. I wonder where it finally went...? But maybe it's better I don't know.

The Utah Jazz: It looks like all the injuries are finally catching up with them. Carlos Boozer, Andrei Kirilenko and Matt Harpring were all out, and Kyrylo Fesenko strained his lower back during warmups. No, I'm not making that up. The Jazz shot 39 percent, committed 17 turnovers and fell into a 16-point hole before climbing out to lose by only 4. Said Kyle Korver: "We just don't have a whole lot of rhythm right now." I'm sure Jerry Sloan would happily sacrifice rhythm for a few healthy bodies.

Update! Kobe Bryant: He spent almost half an hour in a handicap bathroom stall at the Staples Center while a man confined to a wheelchair sat outside waiting patiently but fighting not to mess himself. The kicker? Kobe didn't even have to go to the restroom. He just wanted to catch up on his text messaging.

Labels: Brandon Roy, Darko, Emeka Okafor, Mario West, Memphis Grizzlies, Minnesota Timberwolves, New York Knicks, Oklahoma City Thunder, Washington Wizards, Worst of the Night

"Bloargh!"
Thanks to Martin for the pic.

Larry Brown: His Bobcats fell to 2-5 -- and 1-2 on their current six-game home stand -- and you can already see the first signs of the patented Larry Brown Discontent (TM). Said Brown: "I have never been with a team where you're trying to figure out whether we drive the ball, whether we post the ball, whether we run pick and roll. It's a real puzzle right now." Larry did, however, take a break from his puzzling to crack on Sean May, who had been on the inactive list since Charlotte's first game due to unsightly fatness (seriously, take a look at his player profile picture). Regarding May's two-minute, 27-second stint -- in which he went 0-for-1 and had an assist -- Brown said: "It took him four seconds to shoot a jump shot." Aw, cheer up, Larry. At least Adam Morrison's shooting a career-high 39 percent! In all seriousness, I think Brown might set a personal record for growing weary and leaving a team this season. And if he does indeed dump the 'Cats, I would like Larry to know that, based on these and other comments he's made over the years, that he'll always have a job at Basketbawful. Only it will be unpaid and he'll have to fetch me my morning coffee. Café latte. Twist of lemon. Sweet 'n' low.

J.R. Smith: He's supposed to be instant offense -- just add water!! -- but I guess somebody forgot to add the water yesterday. Smith finished with 3 points on 1-for-7 shooting (0-for-3 from downtown) and a couple turnovers in 17 minutes. It's the third time in the last four games that he's scored 5 or fewer points. On the season, he's hitting a career-low 36 percent of his shots. But at least his defense has been...never mind.

Emeka Okafor: I sure do love to watching guys underachieve after signing huge offseason contract extensions! Okafor scored 2 points on 1-for-5 shooting and had three of his shots returned to sender. He's almost averaging a double-double (10.1 PPG and 9.9 RPG), which is good I guess. Just not six-year, $72 million good. Man, if only there was someplace I could go to discuss how much I don't like this guy...hey, it's the Emeka Okafor Sucks Forum! Perfect!

Ben Wallace: He had his fourth scoreless game (out of eight) of the season last night. He shot 0-for-3 and had only 4 rebounds. And get this: He's Cleveland's highest paid player this season at $14,500,000. Yes, you read that correctly. He makes more money than teammate LeBron James. [Insert maniacal laughter here.] Oh, and here's a little retroactive WotN: Two games ago, against the Pacers, Big Ben had zero points and zero rebounds in 19 minutes of lack-tion. It becomes increasingly unbelievable that, only two seasons ago, he was the hottest free agent acquisition in the league. Pretty soon, the sound technicians at Quicken Loans Arena are going to be ringing that gong for things like "sitting down to rest aching knees" and "rubbing Icy Hot on back to reduce spasms."

Wally Szczerbiak and Boobie Gibson: They combined to score zero points on 0-for-11 shooting (and 0-for-8 from beyond the arc). But they did contribute 3 rebounds and 6 fouls in almost 50 minutes of composite PT. You've gotta love one-dimensional shooters who can't shoot the ball. It's like having a garbage man who leaves trash instead of picking it up.

Mike Brown, quote machine: After the game, the Cleveland coach showed off his acute perceptiveness by observing that: "LeBron is LeBron." You know, in case you didn't realize who LeBron was. He's LeBron. Got that?

Mo Williams, quote machine: After a successful game against his old team, Williams said: "I had fun...and 'Bron was 'Bron." Has everybody got that? Lebron James was and still is LeBron James. I hope this finally clears up all the confusion.

The Philadelphia 76ers: After watching his team score 80 points and shoot only 38 percent at home -- falling to a very disappointing 2-5 in the process -- Sixers coach Maurice Cheeks said: "I just think our offense is out of sync." Well, thanks for that penetrating insight, Captain Obvious. Here are the raw numbers, in case you keep track of these things: Philly currently ranks 17th in shooting (43.9) and 22nd in scoring (94.9), which isn't what everybody expected when the team broke their giant piggy bank to sign Elton Brand over the summer. I mean, Brand was supposed to hit a high percentage of his shots and create easy buckets for everybody else wasn't he? Yet they scored more and shot better last season without him. This is a sign that, Boston's success last year notwithstanding, you can't always dump an All-Star onto a decent team and expect immediate success.

Kyle Korver: Speaking of shooters who can't shoot, Korver was 1-for-7 from the field last night. I guess he should spend more time practicing and less time signing autographs. Congrats on the successful coat drive though, Kyle.

The Dallas Mavericks: Sure they were without Josh Howard, and yeah they gave it their all last night, but they squandered a great opportunity to hand the Lakers their first loss of the season. (They also wasted a turn-back-the-clock performance by Jerry Stackhouse, who not only lit it up offensively but put the locks on Kobe over the last couple minutes of the game.) Their biggest bust: Letting L.A. erase a 10-point deficit and take a small lead while Kobe Bryant was on the bench.

And, actually, it's like Wild Yams has been saying in the comments: The Lakers are beating people with their bench. I mean, check out all the +/- scores. All the Laker starters (except Andrew Bynum) were down, while all the bench players (except Luke Walton) were up: Trevor Ariza was +16, Lamar Odom and The Machine were +13, and Jordan Farmar was +9. The L.A. Pine Riders scored 36 points, grabbed 18 rebounds, dished 4 assists, stole the ball 7 times and had 2 blocked shots. But even more important than those numbers were the energy and defensive tenacity they brought (particularly Ariza, who's starting to look like as much of a steal as Pau Gasol).

The Mavericks' bench: Outside of Jerry Stackhouse, the Dallas Bench Raiders pulled a collective no-show. Most disappointing, though, was (and has been) the play of Brandon Bass, who was nearly transparent in 11 minutes. He had an assist. That's it. How does that happen? Even Jose Juan Barea had a rebound in his limited PT (four minutes). I had Bass tagged as a breakout player at best and, at worst, one of those energy/intangible players. I have no idea what happened to him.

Jason Kidd: His triple-double (16 points, 11 rebounds, 10 assists) was mitigated by his 1-for-7 three-point shooting. Uh, Jas, they're leaving you open out there for a reason. I would like to point out, though, that Kidd is having a mini-renaissance this season. He's shooting a career-high 47 percent and looks much more comfortable running the Mavs' offense than he did last season. In fact, they look kind of lost without him when he's out of the game. In fact, Dallas is starting to develop one of those "Steve Nash and the Suns" sort of deals where the offense grinds to a halt when Kidd is out of the game...and there's no serviceable backup in sight.

Dirk Nowitzki: He didn't just miss a late three-pointer that could have tied the game, he launched a shot that hit nothing but air. And he was wide open. So in case you were wondering, the answer is: Dirk still cannot be trusted in clutch situations.

Dirk Nowitzki versus Pau Gasol: It was a real joy watching these to marshmallows go head-to-head. I've never witnessed a more diverse display of arm flails, pissy looks, pained expressions and verbal flops in all my years of watching basketball. The weird thing was, Gasol was getting more love from the refs. At one point, Gasol used a particularly aggressive verbal flop to draw a delayed whistle even though it looked like Dirk had slapped all ball. Meanwhile, Dirk received only four FTAs despite the fact that the Lakers were roughing him up all night.

Andrew Bynum: He got his numbers -- 11 points, 10 rebounds, 3 blocked shots -- but his post game was "meh" and he had some ugly misses. But worse than that was the seeming lack of fire in his belly. He loped up and down the floor. He let Erick Dampier (12 offensive rebounds) push him around. Watching the game, I kept thinking, "Man, if this kid played with Trevor Ariza's passion, there'd be no stopping him." But I'm not sure Bynum has that passion. And he's already been extended, so you probably can't expect any Contract Year Phenomenon-style play out of him. Remember, he was supposed to be The Story of L.A.'s predicted early season success. Instead, it's been their bench.

Derek Fisher: Last night's 1-for-8 shooting performance is part of a larger trend: Fish is shooting 32 percent from the field and has yet to hit 50 percent of his shots in a game this season. It's taking all the veteran leadership he can muster to keep his spot in the rotation. That and the compromising pictures he has of Phil Jackson modeling a Native American headdress...and nothing else.

Luke Walton: Three minutes, 0-for-1, and a suck differential of +1.

Update! Sasha Vujacic: Taken out by a chest bump. Congrats, Sasha. You've supplanted Pau as the biggest wuss on the team. You must be proud. (Thanks to Jodial and the anonymous poster for the link.)


Joakim Noah: He got his first start of the season and responded with a lackluster 2-point, 8-rebound performance. More distressing than his stat line, though, was the lack of energy he brought to the floor...since, you know, he's supposed to be Chicago's energy guy and all that. I don't know if Noah's out of shape or what -- how is that even possible? -- but he did a lot of loping up and down the floor last night. And Al Horford, his old college teammate, ate his lunch (27 points, 17 rebounds).

Tyrus Thomas: In 21 minutes, he scored 3 points on 1-for-8 shooting and had almost as many turnovers (3) as rebounds (5). He also had more blocks against (3) than blocks (1). He's not shooting 28 percent on the season. Meanwhile, here's how the player the Bulls could have had is doing...

Officiating: It wasn't so much the 36-25 advantage in free throw attempts that got my attention -- the Hawks were the more aggressive team, after all -- but there was one play Zaza Pachulia received a pass and took three long steps without a dribble before laying it in. And there was a ref right there to see it. How do you blow that call? It's not like that was LeBron James or anything. It was Zaza Pachulia!

Basketbawful: Okay. I have to admit. Derrick Rose is looking pretty impressive.

Acie Law IV: Nominated by Bret of Peachtree Hoops: "-17 in just over 8 minutes of playing time, 0-1 FGA (that shot was blocked) and a personal foul. It's not his fault that Woodson too often last year played him alongside Tyronn Lue and this year alongside Flip Murray rather than letting him run pick-and-roll with the second unit but he's been impressively ineffective thus far." Hm, 1.5 PPG on 23 percent shooting and 1.5 RPG over six games. I'd say "ineffective" is being pretty generous.

Othello Hunter: He had a one trillion against the Bulls.

Mario West: His 14-second stint earned Mario his first Mario of the season. And there was much rejoicing.

Mike D'Antoni: He still can't figure out a way to stop Tim Duncan or score against the Spurs. Last night, his team scored 80 points and shot only 38 percent. I can only hope that, for D'Antoni's sake, that money does indeed buy happiness. I wouldn't know myself.

Kurt Thomas: He played almost 10 minutes and didn't grab a single rebound. Did he shrink? It's the second time this season he failed to snare a board.

Matt Bonner: He managed a 28-second Mario against the Knicks. Which, to be honest, was 28 more seconds than I thought he'd get.

The Sacramento Kings: They pressed the fourth quarter self-destruct button last night, thus squandering an early 15-point lead and missing out on the chance to reach .500 for the first time since December 4, 2006. As Reggie Theuss screamed and fumed on the sidelines, the Kings committed 5 turnovers in four minutes, which allowed the Pistons to go on a 12-6 run to ice the game. Theuss -- who yelled "NO!" during one doomed possession -- said: "None of [the turnovers] were caused by the other team. [It was] just carelessness on our part. Our guys -- give them credit -- I really felt like they outplayed (Detroit) for 42 minutes." Sadly, NBA games are still 48-minute affairs. Theuss was also upset about the free throw disparity. "Thirty-six free throws to our 17 is ridiculous. Their stars got the calls down the stretch." Mmmm. Sour grapes.

Brad Miller: Prepare to throw up in your mouth a little: Brad scored 7 points on 16 shot attempts and have five of his shots blocked. Uh, he's still seven feet tall, right? Was he shooting the ball while sitting down or something? Said Miller: "That was one of the worst games I've had since high school, college, pros, summer league...[while playing] PlayStation, [Nintendo] Wii, you name it." Well, at least he's self-aware.

Jason Maxiell: Am I missing something? I figured he was due for some extended PT and an expanded role after 'Tony McDyess got shipped to Denver. But he's played 14, 17 and 11 minutes since the trade, scoring zero, 2 and 3 points on 1-for-9 shooting. He's also snatched only 7 rebounds in those three games. Is he hurt? Dying of some rare Mediterranean disease? What happened?

Rasheed Wallace: Last night's 7-point, 7-rebound, 3-for-8 shooting performance is indicative of the 2008-09 'Sheed thus far. He's currently averaging only 11.4 PPG on a career-low 39 percent shooting. In a contract year.

Kevin McHale: It looks like Kevin Love (9.6 PPG, 7.0 RPG, 1.4 APG) is going to be a solid (if unspectacular) pro. But O.J. Mayo (21 PPG, 5.0 RPG, 2.4 APG) is already an awesome pro. So, you know, wrong again, Kevin. But at least you got Antoine Walker off the payroll. So you've got that going for you.

Mark Madsen: Two minutes, 1 foul, suck differential of +1.

Big, flapping vaginas: Al Harrington missed his third straight game with a strained lower back and Corey Maggette sat out his fourth consecutive game wtih a strained left hamstring. Once again: Money well spent, Chris Mullin. Money well spent.

Kobe Bryant: He used the last of the toilet paper and didn't replace the roll.

Labels: Ben Wallace, bloargh, Emeka Okafor, Kobe Bryant, Larry Brown, Mario West, Philadelphia 76ers, Sacramento Kings, Worst of the Night

Barry Hall: Watch this video of Barry Hall punching out Brent Staker and then throwing up his arms in that "What? I didn't do anything?" way we all know too well and then tell me that the first name that popped into your head wasn't Bruce Bowen.


Atlanta Hawks: I guess now that they've secured their place at the end of Boston's iron boot, they have nothing else to prove. Me? I'd be embarrassed to let somebody to come into my house and put an ass-whoopin' on me in my last home game of the regular season. But I guess I'm just old-school that way.

Stan Van Gundy, quote machine: His team's playoff spot might be secure, but Stan the Man isn't conceding anything. "If they’re keeping score, I want to win. I don’t care, exhibition game or anything else. If there's a scoreboard, I'd rather be on the right side of that. Now, I wasn't going to sacrifice everything for that. I wasn’t going to play guys 40 minutes or whatever. But we want to win." Take that, Pat Riley.

Minnesota Timberwolves: They shouldn't feel bad for losing to Detroit's bench. Everybody's been doing that lately. But 60 losses? That they should be ashamed of.

Theo Ratliff: He was the only Pistons reserve that came off the bench and didn't score. Gave me flashbacks to high school. [shudders]

Charlotte Bobcats: It never feels good to vomit up a 20-point lead and lose in overtime. Never, ever, ever.

Jason Richardson, quote machine: Regarding his team losing the big lead: "I think we thought we had them buried in the books, and you can't do that to any NBA team. You have a team down, you have to kick them. In the NBA, if you don't kick them, they are going to kick you. That's what they did." I hope all the elementary school kids who follow the NBA got all that.

Emeka Okafor, poster boy: Getting posterized? Bad. Getting posterized so hard your nose explodes? Very bad. [From Odenized.]

Devin Harris: Did anybody else notice he came off the bench last night to back up the 39-year-old Darrell Armstrong? Also: 5 turnovers.

Peja Stojakovic: Peja? Oh, Peja! The basket's that way. No, that way. Yikes...2-for-14...he must have been channelling the spirit of Joakim Noah.

Bonzi Wells: DNP-CD. Huh. (I've been told he was sick.)

Brevin Knight: His stat line -- 0 points, 9 assists, and only 1 turnover -- was so classic Brevin Knight that the box scorer from last night's game should be engraved on his tombstone someday.

Memphis Grizzlies: They started Jason Collins, Brian Cardinal played 23 minutes, Darko and Kwame Brown got DNP-CDs, they lost by 22 points, and it looks like they're going to match last season's league-worst record of 22-60.

Von Wafer: Everyone's favorite German sugar cookie had a one trillion against the Grizzlies. Thanks to Steven for the head's up.

John Salmons and Spencer Hawes: With Ron Artest and Brad Miller out of the lineup (again), Salmons and Hawes got their chance to shine! And didn't. The dystrophic duo combined to shoot 5-for-26 from the field.

Lamar Odom's suit: This is from Basketbawful reader Wild Yams: "Mr. Bawful, this definitely needs your looking into, cause if it isn't awful I don't know what is. You've got to check out Lamar Odom's suit that he wore to and from the Lakers-Kings game last night.

"The LA papers reported the following tidbits on it: Odom wandered into the locker room wearing a white suit with purple and gold trim that practically jumped off the lapels and sleeves. He was more than 20 minutes late.'You here with your marching band?' Coach Phil Jackson yelled out, mildly annoyed, or more likely, fairly amused. Odom walked into the locker room as a late arrival before the game in a white jacket with purple sleeves, a gold collar and white pants, which prompted Jackson to tell him, 'Oh my God, no wonder you took so long.'

"You can glimpse the suit in Odom's postgame interview that's up at this site, and here's a not-so-great screengrab of it. It should be pointed out that the bellhop-esque suit does in fact have a hood, and that Odom wore a similarly styled 'suit' to the previous game against the Spurs (only it had red trim instead of yellow and purple). Mr. Odom may have just topped those T-shirts he was selling awhile back."

I'm looking into this one now. More if I can get it.

Labels: Atlanta Hawks, Charlotte Bobcats, Devin Harris, Emeka Okafor, English Football, Memphis Grizzlies, Peja Stojakovic, Stan Van Gundy, Worst of the Night

"Got your nose!!
Larry Hughes: The Cavs dropped a 117-116 overtime decision to the Magic, despite a virtuoso 39/14/15 performance from Lebron James. Cleveland might have pulled this one out if Hughes hadn't shot a pathetic 2-12 from the field. This guy is making $12 million this season. Shouldn't he be able to make a jumpshot too?

Andrea Bargnani: The Raptors' former number one overall draft pick scored 2 points on 1-11 shooting, as Utah edged Toronto 92-88. What's amazing is that Bargnani managed to suck that badly in only 15 minutes of action. When you average almost one missed shot per minute, well, that's not good. The kid was so far off last night that he probably missed the bench after Sam Mitchell yanked him out of the game. Meanwhile, Andre Kirilenko hit only one of six shots, but he had a team-high 11 assists. The Russian Rifle is now averaging 11 PPG, 7 RPG, 7 APG, 2.5 BPG, and almost 2 SPG. Looks like Sloan's compliments are working.

Indiana Pacers: The Pacers suffered their fifth straight loss after getting blown out by an equally awful Wizards team. You know what's wrong with the Pacers? Jermaine O'Neal. I'm completely serious. The Pacers started out the season on fire. Everybody was involved in the offense, cutting without the ball, passing, getting high percentage shots. It's no coincidence that O'Neal missed the first game and played a reduced role in the next couple. Now that he's back to getting big minutes and lots of shots, the team's offensive production has dropped. You know why? Because when the ball goes to him in the low post, it doesn't come back out, and then you have four other guys just standing around and watching him. I guess that would be okay if he hit a high percentage of his shots, but he's shooting 38 percent from the field! So sure, he may end up with All-Star, or close to All-Star numbers, but he's killing the rest of the team.

Emeka Okafor: Mr. Chukwuemeka Noubuisi Okafor showed the world last night why he turned down the Bobcats' generous $55 million contract extension offer, scoring 6 points (3-9) and grabbing 8 rebounds. It seems that Okafor wants Dwight Howard money (five years, $85 million) despite the fact that he doesn't put up Dwight Howard numbers or put in Dwight Howard time; Okafor's only played 93 (out of a possible 164) games the last two seasons.

Vince Carter: Hmm, guess who was missing from the Celtics/Nets game last night? That's right, it was Vince "I just signed a huge contract extension so I'm going to stop caring" Carter. Yes, I know he was technically out with a sprained ankle, but he wasn't exactly lighting it up in the six games he did play: 17 PPG (on 39 percent shooting), 5 RPG, 4 APG. That's a pretty steep dropoff from last year's 25/6/5 (and 45 percent shooting). Can you say Contract Year Phenomenon? And is anyone the least bit surprised?

Miami Heat: Wow. Not even trash talk from Pat Riley and the return of Dwyane Wade could alter the Heat's trance-like play. Riley threatened to suit up and play after the previous night's defeat, and he went off again after the team's 104-95 loss to the Sonics: "Unless you feel like you have something at stake or something to lose as a player, then things won't change. If you don't feel like the Heat mean something to you...you have to have a real meeting with yourself about what you care about. I don't see a team that really feels like they have anything at stake here. They come in, they play, they get beat, they go home, they go out into the night." Way to toss your team to the wolves there, Pat. I'm sure they'll want to give you their best effort next time. Meanwhile, Smuch Parker, the team's big offseason pickup, hit zero of his four shots and is shooting 28 percent for the season.

Hornets / Sixers: Exhibit B in the case of "The NBA season is too damn long and has too many meaningless games."

Tracy McGrady: Well, T-Mac has officially suffered his first semi-serious injury of the season (strained right elbow). We all knew it was going to happen, we just didn't know when. Without their closer, the Rockets lost 93-90 to the Lakers. I feel bad for McGrady, but at least I feel better about advising my friend not to trade Duncan for McGrady in his fantasy league.

Phil Jackson: You know, I assumed that, after last season's "Tim Hardaway hates gay people" controversy, somebody as intelligent as Phil Jackson would know better than to make a gay joke during a postgame press conference. Well, I was wrong. Jackson has subsequently apologized to "any horses, Texans, cowboys or guys" that he might have offended, and I'm sure he was positively dripping with sincerity when he said that.

New York Knicks: The team fell to 2-5 after an 84-81 loss to the Clippers. On the bright side, they probably would have lost by more if Stephon Marbury had actually shown up and played. Wait...what? He did play? And everything's just fine between he and Isiah now? Are you kidding me? I can't believe this circus is still going on, and on, and on...

Golden State Warriors: Last year's feel-good team is this year's feel-awful team: 0-6 and about to embark on a five-game Eastern Conference road trip. The only good news for the Warriors is that their road trip includes games against the Knicks, Wizards, and 76ers. Do you think this team misses Jason Richardson? And Stephen Jackson? And a Don Nelson that actually gives a crap? I other news, has this team even played defense yet this season? They're giving up 118 PPG on 51 percent shooting, 46 from three-point range. They're also giving up 30 FT attempts per game, and their opponents are averaging 28 assists. They're getting outscored by 11 PPG and getting outrebounded by 10 RPG. That's it, I'm taking the "D" out of their name and giving it back to the Nuggets. From now on, these guys are the Golen State Warriors.

Labels: Andrea Bargnani, Emeka Okafor, Golden State Warriors, Indiana Pacers, Lebron James Larry Hughes, Miami Heat, New York Knicks, Phil Jackson, Stephon Marbury, Tracy McGrady, Vince Carter