Another week here at Basketbawful has come and gone. If you're out this weekend exchanging or returning any Birdmas gifts you got, watch out for the crowds, cause I hear shopping can be a pain this time of year. Well, it's Friday, and since it's not 1995 neither Ice Cube nor Chris Tucker are relevant anymore, so Friday can mean only one thing: it's time for your BAD Weekend Watch. Lots of games, let's get right to it.Worst of the Night in Pictures:
Melo forgot to put deodorant on before last night's game, which led to many easy looks like the one you see here. No wonder he had 40 points!
Caron Butler played pretty well last night for a guy with no legs.
Here we see Dwight doing his best to try to karate kick Ronnie Brewer off of the invisible platform he's perched on.
"Deron, can you believe I'm wearing such a relatively normal suit?"
Nationally Televised Games - Friday:
Trail Fail Blazers at Crabs - The way Shaq has been playing lately, I don't think I'm out of line to predict that Greg Oden might actually outplay him tonight. Also, LeBron? Stop giving me reasons to not like you as much. Please. I want so badly to like you, but you're making this hard.
Magic at Suns - Fresh off falling apart in spectacular fashion against the Jazz, the Magic look to regroup against a team that shoots as many threes as they do. Here's a tip, Magicians: give it to Dwight Howard, cause I have a hunch that Channing Frye might not be able to guard him in the post.
All the Other Games - Friday:
Nyets at Pacers - Boom! Right off the bat, it's your Basketbawful Game of the Night!
Rockets at 76ers - It's Houston's scrappy against Philly's crappy. Watch for Aaron Brooks and Iverson to be sprinting around after each other all night while Trevor Ariza goes mano a mano with Andre Igoudala.
Hawks at Craptors - Toronto's probably looking for revenge after the Hawks dropped 146 on them last week. Too bad the Dinos stink something awful. After last week's beat down Toronto's Jarrett Jack had this to say: "We should be embarrassed. Everybody should be embarrassed." Yes, Jarrett. Yes, you should.
Mavs at Heat - Lucky for Dallas this game comes in the middle of all that Donaghy brouhaha, otherwise tonight's game might have looked like a three hour session of Dwyane Wade practicing his free throw shooting. In other news I'm hearing Josh Howard's status for this game is uncertain because of lingering ankle pain. I wonder if someone from the team has searched his locker yet for a prescription for medical marijuana?
Knicks at Hornets - A couple weeks ago who would have thought these two teams would meet up while both riding three game winning streaks?
Warriors at Bulls - Vinny Del Negro is hanging onto that coaching spot by his fingernails and Nellie is too drunk to care. Vinny, if there's one way to give yourself a little job security, it's playing against the Golden State "defense." It's almost like a real-life version of NBA 2K10.
Thunder at Grizzlies - Oklahoma City?! Memphis?! Even the mid-market 70s teams think this is getting out of hand. (By the way, think Memphis still is okay with taking Hasheem Thabeet in the draft instead of James Harden?)
Bobcats at Spurs - The Bobcats are 1-8 on the road this season. They only average 90.3 points per game (despite dropping over 100 in their past two games). I wonder if those two stats are somehow related?
Timberwolves at Lakers -
Just what we've all been waiting for: a matchup of the two teams in the league that use the triangle offense! You know what you get when you put two triangles together like that? Free tacos
Nationally Televised Game - Saturday:
Celtics at Bulls - This could be a classic trap game for Boston if they... yeah right. Who knew they'd started televising executions?
All the Other Games - Saturday:
Wizards Generals - Indiana's on the second night of a back to back on the road and they're missing Danny Granger. Then again they're playing the Wizards so this really could go either way.
Warriors at Pistons - With Andris Biedrins still out with Pubis Faciitis (or whatever his latest ailment is), the Warriors' interior D is so bad that Ben Wallace might actually be able to score a point or two. You never know.
Bobcats at Mavs - The last time the Mavs played the second night of a back-to-back, they put up a pathetic 75 points. The Bobcats are just the medicine to cure those offensive blues.
Suns at Nuggets - Thank God! A compelling game! Oh, wait, the Suns are on the second night of a back-to-back? Nevermind. Looks like it's one of those "scheduling losses" for Phoenix. Sorry Sunsfans :(
Lakers at Jazz - LA can't really use the "scheduling loss" excuse for this one if they lose, since Utah just proved last night that a team can play in LA one day and Salt Lake City the next and still do quite well.
Timberwolves at Kings - Not only is this your Basketbawful Game of the Night, but it may very well be the Basketbawful Game of the Weekend.
Nationally Televised Game - Sunday:
Spurs at Clippers - This one's the Basketbawful Game of the Night kinda by default, simply because really none of the other games looks to be that bad. Though I have to say, the Spurs having only one road win on the year isn't helping their cause any.
All the Other Games - Sunday:
Rockets at Craptors - Sigh. We're of course assuming that the Dinos haven't gone extinct by this point by even including it on the schedule.
Nyets at Hawks - I wonder if Mikhail Prokhorov feels he's getting his money's worth. Does the NBA have a return policy when you purchase a team? Can he get a store credit and buy another less-crappy team?
Grizzlies at Heat - Two teams going in opposite directions as the Grizzlies have won 8 of 12 while the Heat have lost 7 of 11. I officially don't know what to make of this Grizzlies team. Maybe Miami will beat them and help restore some sense of normalcy.
Crabs at Thunder - No BS, LeBron vs. Durant should be an epic matchup for years to come... and for the first time ever Durantula is averaging more points per game than King Crab is. This game actually could be good. Betcha the NBA schedule makers didn't plan on that.
Labels: Bawful After Dark, Boston Celtics, Chicago Bulls, Cleveland Cavaliers, Los Angeles Clippers, Orlando Magic, Phoenix Suns, Portland Trail Blazers, San Antonio Spurs