Amare

First, a few belated WotNs...

Amare Stoudemire: From Basketbawful reader Josh: "I was at the Pacers/Suns game when Amare went off for 49. However, Amare, as well as everyone else at the game, believed that he had scored 51, breaking the 50-point barrier along with his career high of 50. This is because the giant player statistics screen at Conseco Fieldhouse showed that Amare had scored 51. At this point, Amare began passing every time he got the ball, seemingly going for a triple-double. He had to be a little disappointed when he go to the locker room and was told that he didn't break 50."

Stat padding? From a guy who once nicknamed himself STAT?! Never! After the game, Sun Tzu said: "You guys here in Indiana cheated me." Now, supposedly he made the comment jokingly, but I'm guessing his laughter was about as sincere as McCain's concession speech.

Steve Blake: Yesterday, Basketbawful reader Austen left the following comment: "Heh, I'm surprised you didn't note that funny moment during the Jazz-Blazers game where one of the players was trying to catch an inbound pass and stuck his right foot out behind him...into Brevin Knight's crotch area. Knight decided to clamp his knees together, so hilarity ensued when that player tried to run in a different direction to catch the inbounds pass. They ended up having to rush the inbound passer back inbonds after the pass just to keep the play going." Austen later added: "It was Blazers player [Steve] Blake who stuck his foot out into Brevin Knight's man region, and got caught with his foot in the cookie jar at 5:19 in the 4th quarter of last night's game." And here's the pictorial evidence:

Knight-Ft2

Elton Brand: Shortly after the Philadelphia 76ers signed Brand to that $80 million contract last summer, Elton said: "I'm prepared to do some big things this year." Last night, those "big things" included scoring 6 points on 3-for-8 shooting in 35 minutes. Brand has been in an offensive slump so far this season. He's scored 20+ points and hit at least half of his shots only once, and it's no coincidence that it happened against the Knicks and Mike D'Antoni's "We play defense for :07 seconds or less" system. Now, mind you, it's not Brand's fault. Part of the reason for his struggles are the fault of...

The Philadelphia 76ers' offense: The Sixers, as a team, are shooting 44 percent as a team this season. And that number would be far worse if the Sixers hadn't hit 60 percent of their shots against both the Knicks and the Kings...two utterly defenseless teams. Philly shot 34 percent in their season opener against Toronto, 41 percent at Atlanta, 37 percent versus Miami and 38 percent last night against Orlando. Right now, the team's spacing is horrible. Brand is getting harrassed by double-teams and nobody seems to know where to position themselves for the kickout. When you have a dominant low post player, you have to provide him with passing angles and capable shooters. Right now, Brand is getting neither.

Andre Miller: I guess he's been watching too much Derrick Rose. Last night, Miller took 24 shots -- and hit only 7 of them -- while dishing for only 2 assists. That's six more shot attempts than the next closest guy (Thaddeus Young was 7-for-18), and 12 more shots than the guy after that (Andre Iguodala was 4-for-12). As I've said before, a 10-to-1 ratio of shots-to-assists is not what you want from your starting point guard.

Dwight Howard: He was limited to only four first-half minutes due to foul trouble and still finished with 14 points, 8 rebounds and 3 blocked shots. And 7 of those points and 2 of the blocks came during the fourth quarter, when the Magic where holding off the Sixers' rally. But man, I would feel a lot better about Superman if he could develop a low post move or two. And if he could hit a free throw (he was 2-for-8 last night and is currently at 44 percent for the season).

J.J. Redick: Earned his second consecutive DNP-CD. Remember, he was the sixth man about a week ago.

Stan Van
"Let's finish this up guys. I really gotta pee!"

The Houston Rockets' end-of-game defense: You'd think that a team built on defense would be able to hold a one-point lead with 0.8 seconds left, right? Well, then, you'd be wrong. Brandon Roy dropped a 30-foot atom bomb on the Rockets as time expired to give the Blazers a 101-99 overtime win. Said Rockets coach Rick Adelman: "I don’t know why he got so wide open. We should have had somebody on him. We made a mistake." Yeah, I'd call that a mistake. Man, where's Shane Battier when you need him?

Of course, Roy had to hit that shot to avoid getting a WotN mention himself, since on the previous possession he fouled Yao on a score, which allowed Ming the Merciless (after hitting the free throw) to put Houston up by one point with less than a second on the clock. Actually, you know what...

Brandon Roy: I'm happy for the kid. I am. He hit some clutch shots. But I don't want to see him posing like this unless he's in the middle of some kind of gamma ray-induced transformation.

Roy
"Bloargh!"

Yao Ming: When I watched Yao's first shot of the game get blocked by Joel Przybilla -- and it was a smother chicken, no less -- I knew I'd be hearing about Yao from somebody. Sure enough, I received the following e-mail from Basketbawful reader Vinny Gorgeous a few minutes later: "I am writing this with 9:40 left in the first quarter of the Blazers-Rockets game, and I'm ready to nominate Yao for WotN, because DAY-UMN -- the Vanilla Gorilla with a huge rejection. And now Joel's been added to the list of things Yao Ming can't dunk on (along with the rim.) I mean, it's 2 minutes in! His legs can't be tired at this point! And he's getting stuffed by JOEL PRZYBILLA? I don't care if he goes off for 30/20/5 tonight, that's awful."

It's even more awful than you think, Vinny, since -- as I pointed out -- the block you're talking about was the second time Joel had stuffed another brick into the Great Wall of Yao. Oh, and Yao didn't go off for 30/20/5. More like 13/6/1 on 4-for-13 shooting. Oh, and for future reference, Joel is referred to as the Vanilla Godzilla around these parts.

Bonus footage! It's a few days delayed, but here's a mashup of Yao's performance against the Celtics a few days ago:


Ron Artest: He was supposed to help ease the Rockets' scoring woes, but last night he scored a "meh" 9 points on 3-for-9 shooting. He's shooting 34 percent on the season...and only 31 percent from inside the arc.

Update! Tracy McGrady: Basketbawful reader Andrei said: "You have to give T-mac a Worst of the Night for his defense on the last play of the game. He was supposed to guard Roy, but once the play started and Roy bolted towards the ball, T-mac just pointed at him and then casually jogged in that direction just in time to see the a-bomb go off in his face. At 1:08 in these highlightsm just keep an eye on McGrady. Way to delegate Mr. All-Star." Good points, one and all.

John Paxson: Hey, John. I just wanted to let you know that LaMarcus Aldridge scored 27 points on 12-for-20 shooting last night. He also grabbed 9 boards, dished out a pair of assists and blocked two shots. And you swapped him for Tyrus Thomas and Viktor Khryapa. Yeah...how's that workin' out for you again? On the subject of the Bulls...

Chicago Bulls drama: One of the reasons the Bulls fell from grace last season was that many of the players had their own agendas and therefore tuned out Scott Skiles. And even after Skiles was canned (on Christmas eve), they didn't exactly kill themselves for interim head coach Jim Boylan. All that stuff was supposed to be ancient history...but it's not: Ben Gordon and Luol Deng are already making subtle criticisms to the press. "Starters have to get off to a good start; that's their responsibility," Gordon said after Sefolosha went scoreless and starting forward Tyrus Thomas had one point against the Cavaliers. "They have to step it up. Maybe Coach needs to mix something up a little bit." Translation: Coach needs to start me.

Deng, on the other hand, seems to think his slow start is the fault of the team's offense. "I still don't feel I'm playing how I want to play. We have to find sets that we're productive from and try to give teams different looks. We stayed with similar sets, especially in the fourth quarter. We have to switch it up a little bit." Translation: Coach needs to call more plays for me.

But Vinny D isn't changing for nobody, nohow: "No, no, no; they're the players, I'm the coach," Del Negro said. "The easiest thing is to look from the outside in and say we should do this or that. But when you go through it, it's a lot different. We're trying to put everybody in the most successful area we can. Sometimes it's not the system; sometimes it is. Sometimes it's the familiarity of everything."

Del Negro then put the onus right back on his players. "It's probably frustration talking. [Deng] got good looks [Wednesday], just like a few other guys. At times I thought we played pretty well moving the ball, but [we're] still shooting the ball too quick. Guys [are] a little bit unsure and thinking too much instead of playing. What happens is, sometimes [players] get a little bit out of sync and they start forcing things and try to do things they're not comfortable with. That hurts them even more. You just have to be patient and understand where you're going to get your shots."

So glad to see that everybody's on the same page...

Update! Kobe Bryant: He cheated to beat his daughters at Candyland. And then he talked trash to them for the rest of the night.

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38 Comments:
Anonymous Simas said...
HOW COULD YOU NOT MENTION THE WORST THING EVER IN THE NBA HISTORY THAT HAPPENED IN THE GAME OF BLAZERS VS ROCKETS? I mean, it was massive. At the end of the game when Yao fired that shot the clock was actually stopped when he released the shot and not when the ball went through the net!! Look at the highlights: Yao got the ball, fired it and then the clock stopped ticking right after the ball were off Yao's hand. This is not fair! Yao's shot should have been a game-winning buzzer beater, but because Stern sucks, the blazers had extra 0.8 seconds. I think that's a disrespect to the sport itself.

Blogger Babyshoes said...
Come on, dude, Stern was not controlling the game clock at this game. Is this really the worst thing ever in NBA history? In game 5 of the regular season? Worse than Hue Hollins' call on Scottie in the '94 Eastern Conference Finals? Worse than the LJ 4-point play in the '99 Eastern Conference Finals? Worse than the Lakers-Kings series in 2002? Worse than a phantom call on Roy just the play before?

Anonymous tradebait said...
That above statement makes sense. I was gonna say how could Yao catch turn shoot and it go in in 1.1 secs but then I remembered the foul was called before the shot so the clock stops and the shoot was a continuation.

Bawful, did you here Sergio Rodriguez wants to be traded to an uptempo team. He finally gets PT (FINALLY!) and starts making demands. The Knicks are trying to get Al from GS but need a third team. Idea! I don't like this deal for Portland but I bet they could get some future draft picks (from NY) knowing them to balance this. Plus, Sergio gets his fast pace offense. Check out my GM attempt.
http://games.espn.go.com/nba/features/traderesult?players=2997~703~2754~3025~2795~3190~308~3277&teams=22~22~9~9~9~18~18~18&te=&cash=22:18~22:9

Anonymous Simas said...
Alright then, I was wrong, sorry. That was one of the most beautiful moments in the history of the NBA :)

Blogger BJ said...
Is there something up with the official scorers/timekeepers lately? The last couple of games I've been to there've been at least a couple of whoopsies with the game clock.
-BJ

Blogger Trevor said...
Karl Malone on Sloan's potential 1000th victory with the Jazz tonight: "Hopefully everybody will appreciate what he do," Malone said. "He come to work every day."
"He don't mind sharing it and saying what he feel about people," Malone said.

Karl Malone love speaking English without using proper verb form.

Anonymous Ash Haque said...
I got a chance to watch the game last night (recorded), and Amare only missed 2 shots the entire game where he wasnt outside the three point line with less than a second on the shot clock. No matter what happened, thats still pretty damn impressive.

Blogger Barry said...
Karl Malone really is a quote machine. It's hard to make out in what language, but damn it he's a quote machine.

Blogger FelChap said...
Just in case anyone missed the real spectacle from last nights Blazer/Rockets fiasco. Check the youtube footage here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLYfplk2RZ4

And somebody tell me what the hell Artest (at the top of the key) is doing after Yao makes his fade away shot. I think he's doing some imaginary jump-roping with a rope 5 times too small for him....

Needless to say the DVR was re-winded a few times.

Blogger Andrei said...
You have to give T-mac a worst of the night for his defense on the last play of the game. He was supposed to guard Roy, but once the play started and Roy bolted towards the ball, T-mac just pointed at him and then casually jogged in that direction just in time to get the a-bomb go off in his face. At 1:08 in these highlights just keep an eye on McGrady http://sports.espn.go.com/broadband/video/videopage?videoId=3687529&categoryId=2459788 . Way to delegate Mr. All-Star. Also, what about the kick-ball being called on Roy at the end of regulation? The ball just flew at his foot after it was slapped away, that could have given the Rockets the ball with time left for a shot of their own. The kick ball actually followed Artest giving Roy a push close to his man region which wasn't called.

Blogger Elyse said...
What did Kobe do yesterday? I am dying to know. Did he steal some kids ice cream? Did he tell Obama's girls they weren't gonna get that puppy?

Anonymous Baguete said...
Dear BBawful and fellows commenters, I really need your help.

I am going to LA this month and will attend Hornets @ Clippers.
I definitely want to buy a Clippers jersey, just for the sake of liking third-string teams.

The problem is: whose jersey should I buy?

Baron will leave in 1 or 2 years.

Camby wont be able to walk anymore in 1 or 2 years.

Ricky Davis will be in jail in 1 or 2 years.

Kaman, well, he's kinda... German.

It leaves me with Al Thornton, but I actually like this guy, so I HOPE he wont be there in 1 or 2 years.

Guys, help me...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
To be fair to Brandon Roy, that picture was taken in while he was in motion and he didn't actually pose that way. (Although the motion was the pull out the jersey move, which I am not personally a big fan of, but it was understandable given the shot he just made.)

Blogger Chris said...
Kobe brought Obama's girls a puppy and then ate it right before their eyes.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
simas -- Well, you know, the clock stopped because Yao was fouled. So nothing dirty there. But hey, you love your team, so I'll forgive you going all Bill Walton on us. ;)

babyshoes -- You just HAD to go and bring up Grandmama's four-pointer, didn't you? Great. My day's ruined now.

tradebait -- Well, I think at this point that the Blazers aren't worried about accruing any additional first rounders. They have all the young talent they could possibly need. If they made a trade, they would probably want (or they SHOULD want) a veteran big man to mentor/back up Greg Oden (and fill in for him the next time he gets injured). Yeah, they have the Vanilla Godzilla, but he has limited effectiveness and everybody knows it.

Second problem is that there's no way D'Antoni's going to give up Q. He's probably Mikey's second-favorite player on the Knicks (just behind Chris Duhom, whom D'Antoni inexplicably loves).

bj -- Clock problems have been occuring with alarming frequency since 07-08. You'd think that the improved technology and watch-dogging would prevent it, but no dice so far.

trevor -- Thank you for that. It saved my day after that whole four-point pla...well, you know. . God I miss the Mailman.

ash haque -- Oh, no question. Amare had a MAN-type game last night.

barry -- Indeed. That's part of why those old Jimmy Kimmel skits were so priceless.

felchap -- Heh! Yeah, that looked like an abbreviated celebration to me. Like, Ron wanted to jump up and down like a crazy man, but the game wasn't over, so he had to be semi-ready in case the Blazers didn't call timeout. He had the same look on his face I probably get when I try to stop peeing midstream because the jackass at the next urinal bumped into me.

andrei -- You're right. I'll add that.

elyse -- Oops. I added the Kobe entry.

baguete -- BD is a basketball nomad. As you said, he'll be gone in a couple years unless he gets hurt. Camby's ancient and his best years are behind him. Ricky Davis...dude, if you got a RD jersey I would personally hunt you down. Kaman is a hairless sasquatch. Sorry: A hairless GERMAN sasquatch. Go with Thornton. Even though his inevitable free agent departure is only a few years away, chances are you'll still like him when he's gone and therefore won't feel that bad about wearing the jersey.

anonymous -- You have a point. But I would have preferred a more "cold-blooded assassin" type of reaction (that is, a non-reaction). You know, like, "Yeah, I know I did that."

chris -- No, no, no. He gave them the puppy, let them enjoy it for a couple months, then kidnapped it and made them listen over the phone while he ate it alive.

Blogger jhaig said...
For those who are curious as to what Marbury and Curry are up to while the Knicks play basketball:

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/blog/ball_dont_lie/post/GTAS-comics-Marbury-and-Curry-DNP-CD-extraordi?urn=nba,120242

Blogger Basketbawful said...
jhaig -- I saw that, and found it pretty funny. But you know what else is funny, and I mean funny-strange? I actually feel kinda sorry for Starbury. He's trapped in basketball purgatory. The Knicks won't cut him or buy him out, but they don't want him to play or practice, either. He tried to start practicing at his old high school, but the Knicks barred him from doing it. Instead of going crazy, which is what I expected, he just said, "I won't do it if it's going to cause a problem." His spirit seems broken at this point.

Look, I think Marbury is a ball-hogging black hole of suck, but D'Antoni and Walsh or yanking him around, probably in an effort to get James Nolan to pull the trigger on a buyout (since Nolan, apparently, wants to keep Marbury around...or something).

I just don't think there's any need to keep Starbury on a string. I dunno. Maybe I'm just soft-hearted on Friday afternoons.

Blogger BJ said...
^Heaven forbid.
-BJ

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
baguete: just get an unmodified "personalized" jersey, where it still says "ANY NAME 00"

Blogger Wild Yams said...
FYI, the Knicks' owner is James Dolan.

Also, if you're going to get a Clipper jersey, you should just go all in and get a jersey of a player that most typified that franchise: Keith Closs.

Also, Chris Kaman has only recently become a hairless sasquatch. Last week in their home opener to the Lakers he was sporting a lot of distracting shoulder hair, but then in the game the other night I noticed his shoulders were totally smooth. What I wanna know is if he shaves or waxes.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I think you should mention that later in the game Yao Ming got blocked a second time by LaMarcus Aldridge.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
anacondahl -- The sad thing is, my first thought was to suggest that he get a personalized jersey with the name of some all-time Clipper great. But there really aren't any all-time Clipper greats. At least, nobody who did anything great as a Clipper. Seriously. It's freaking sad. They may never retire a number.

Yams -- Ugh. I know, I know. My company name has "Nolan" in it, and that must have gotten into my head. And the comments can't be edited. Damn it.

Oh, and how 'bout I change the description to "a relatively hairless sasquatch"?

anonymous -- Really? I only saw the two blocks by Vanilla Godzilla. Damn. I would like to think that, if I were nine feet tall, no one would ever block my shot. Except maybe Stilt Man or Apache Chief.

Blogger Kevin said...
When you're extra tall, people put a little more effort into trying to block your ass. It's just human nature

Anonymous AK Dave said...
Should we feel sorry for Stephan?

Let's see...

He wasn't happy playing with KG in Minnesota and make a big stink about it, sabotaging that team (a promising team with talent no less)...

He was a total lump of poo in New Jersey and might have averaged 1 assist/month if memory serves...

His stint with Phoenix showed just how poorly he plays with others- I mean, look at what a real PG (Nash) did with those same teammates (Marion/Stoudamire) the year after he was traded?

Then there was New York, where Marbury's antics are WELL documented and widely known.

This guy is a CANCER- he should be in the Basketbawful hall of fame, next to Greg Ostertag and Shawn Kemp.

Feeling sorry for Stephon is like feeling sorry for a serial killer. He should fry and he deserves whatever punishment he receives. But on the other hand, I guess your empathy is what makes you different from him in the first place.

I say he should go to Europe. Didn't he already say he wanted to play in Italy? Can an NBA team send a player to Europe in a trade? I hope he ends up in BF Russia or something.

Think about it: it's win-win. He gets to play, and we don't have to see it!

Blogger Wild Yams said...
You know, something more needs to be said about Dwight Howard, cause you're right on the money about him, Mr. Bawful. The guy boards and blocks like nobody's business, but during last night's game they put his stats through his first 4 years with the Magic side by side with Shaq's first 4 years there, and the scoring differential was really staggering: Shaq averaged basically twice as many ppg as Howard has! Now some might say that Shaq is a once in a lifetime specimen and should be expected to score more and all that (and that's true), but Dwight Howard should be a far, far greater scorer than he is. The only part of his offensive game that really resembles Shaq's is his horrid free throw shooting.

I don't get it. Howard is just as athletic as Shaq was, and he's a couple inches shorter and a few pounds lighter than Shaq was at his age; but this places Howard closer in size to many power forwards who can shoot the damn ball. Greg Oden might be limited on offense (we'll know if we ever get to see him play), but he is a 7 footer who is somewhat lumbering so it's to be expected. Dwight Howard, on the other hand, can fly through the air with the greatest of ease! What exactly does Howard do to work on his game in the offseason? Can't he practice shooting the ball, or work on his post game by adding a nice drop step, a jump hook from either block or something like that? Even Shaq, lazy as he was/is throughout his career really perfected those types of moves.

Superman II needs to step it up, cause a guy with his size, strength, speed and agility should be scoring close to 25 ppg easy.

Blogger Austen said...
Frankly, I'd change that WotN for the "Rockets' End-Game Defense" to "Tracy McGrady's End-Game Defense." Brandon Roy was HIS man to guard, but instead of actually guarding him (because, you know, it's not like Roy's known for taking clutch shots or anything) he decided to do help defense double-teamining the inbounds passer. That left Roy wide open for that huge clutch 3-pointer.

McGrady, you're so fond of saying "Itz all on me"...until you lose. Then it's everyone else's fault.

Blogger Shrugz said...
watching the Hawks game
WOW Mario West BLOCKS Joey's layup HAHAHAHAH DAMN

Blogger lordhenry said...
Yao's body is deteriorating at an accelerated rate.....Let's call it "T-Mac's Syndrome." Seriously, I feel sorry for Yao, his body has taken a pounding from playing basketball all year long for awhile. His foot probably isn't healed completely, or worse, has been re-injured, causing him intense pain, especially when being rejected by the "Vanilla Godzilla." And I see that Kobe continues to be a fictional entry, so I must continue to question bawful's sanity and impending spontaneous combustion.....BAH! What am I saying? I love the Kobe a$$holery! Nice pic, By the way, you make a good Jack Sparrow.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Matt Bonner with the Super Mario! Hurrah, for Matt...

Anonymous Baguete said...
Maybe the Rockets have that desease from that Robin Williams' movie, Jack: they grow old 4 times faster than other kids.

Thanks BBawful and AnacondaHL for the tips. I thought about a personalized jersey as well, but then, who should I look up to? Norm Nixon?
I will probably buy a Chris Paul jersey and join the bandwagon...

You said you'd personally hunt me down if I buy a Ricky Davis jersey, so I wonder what will happen to me if I buy a Luke Walton's...

If I ever find a San Diego Clippers jersey, I'd definitely make a Tom Chambers' one.
BBawful said he loves KJ and I gotta say I am a huge Suns fan because of KJ and Tom Chambers. I mean, the guy could dunk from the 3-point line on Sega Genesis! Two of my all-time favorites.

On other news, Kobe called BINGO with two numbers missing and was booed by his own neighboors during a BBQ.

Anonymous barry said...
I think T-Mac kind of slacked off in the hope that Roy wouldn't hit it....but if that is what he thinks he shouldn't even be on the court.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
How about a Clippers singlet with the name "Crystal" on it. He isn't going anywhere, is he?

Anonymous e4nf6 said...
Watching Rockets/Blazers, It looked to me like Tracy expected Artest to switch on the pick. It wouldn't be unusual in that situation to plan to "switch on everything," in which case Mcgrady was doing what he was supposed to do staying with Artest's man.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
for every future worst of please put mark blount in. 7 feet of suck. Comes off the bench, clanks 2 or 3 jumpers with his horrendous form, goes back to bench, and cheers as a 6'8 guys outworks him at his position in every way possible

Anonymous Barry said...
Kazam92: He could well be Brian Scalabrine's evil twin. Though you have to give Scalabrine some credit for his work ethic.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Yeah at least scal knows who he is. Blount thinks he's a SG

Anonymous Anonymous said...
STAT = Standing Tall And Talented.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I don't see why you're surprised that Joel Pryzbilla blocked Yao's shot. He's one of the better shot blockers and defensive centers in the league. His job is to play D (he also takes a lot of charges), rebound, and set screens.

He's not in there for his offense.

And, aside from offense, he's an excellent mentor for GO. Pryz knows his defense, and as far as GO's offensive skills, how is he not going to get better going against Pryz in practice?

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