Timberwolves Trail Blazers Basketball
Constipation: It's Serious Business

Uka pointed this out in WOTN comments:
So Marc Stein is not basketbawful reader. Not surprisingly given the nature of this blog and the fact that Marc Stein is the huge NBA player ass-kisser

"Not sure if he's the first to say it, but the new nickname for Roy, Oden & Co. spotted in John Canzano's column in the Oregonian -- Frail Blazers -- rings as harsh as it is true. Just like Jail Blazers from another era to forget."
How disappointing. I don't claim that we invented the nickname, since I'm sure 800 other people have used it at some point or another (it's so obvious!). However, how can you be that out of touch, Stein? I called him out on Twitter -- we'll see if he responds.

Worst of the Weekend in Pictures:

Lakers 76ers Basketball
"Mmm... Snuggle fresh..."


Heat Knicks Basketball
"Why did I take this job again?"


Timberwolves Nuggets Basketball
"And why did I take this job again?"


Nets Raptors Basketball
If I had to guess which game would have a picture like this...


Heat Wizards Basketball
I guess the phrase "For Nothing" is implied in that poster?


Clippers Bulls Basketball
"Been awhile since I celebrated, don't remember how, gotta concentrate..."


Nationally Televised Games:
Mavericks at Heat, NBA TV, 7:30pm: Just a reminder: the last time these teams met was the "LeBron bumps into Spoelstra" game. Revenge game possibilities, anyone?

All the Other Games:
Magic at Hawks, 7pm: Hey Orlando, I'm truly sorry, but I have to say it: Ball.

Jazz at Cavaliers, 7pm: The Jazz have gotten into the "zig-zag" pattern that Vegas sharps love to bet in the playoffs. Win one, lose one. Win one, lose one. Do they not realize they have a few months to go before it's even time for the playoffs? Anyone looking for a last-minute Christmas gift for the Jazz, get them a calendar.

Hornets at Pacers, 7pm: Let's just say this game isn't giving me the itch to order NBA League Pass.

Bobcraps at Wizards Generals, 7pm: All right, Washington. You finally got rid of Gilbert Arenas' awful contract! And in return you got... Rashard Lewis' likewise awful contract and five to seven fewer points per game. Hurray? Well, less chance of gun-related arrest action, so you've got that going for you, which is nice.

Suns at Spurs, 8:30pm: When I first saw the news about the Suns/Magic trade, I was disgusted. Then the more I thought about it, I began to convince myself maybe it's not the end of the world. They're not a championship contender this year anyway. Why not get rid of Hedo and his contract for any other warm body? Plus, Pietrus's catch-and-shoot threes are a good fit and maybe he can play some defense, and Gortat could give them the inside presence they need if he can handle playing lots of minutes. And Vinsanity's an expiring contract from what I understand, so maybe that won't be too bad? Am I just delusional and lying to myself at this point?

Bucks at Frail Blazers, 10pm: We have officially reached the point where it's nearly impossible to come up with new ways to say "the Blazers are a goddamn trainwreck of injuries."

Rockets at Warriors, 10:30pm: Good news, Houston fans! The Rockets have won seven of their 10 games this month. Bad news? They're still three games under .500 at this point. If they were in the Leastern conference, that wouldn't be so bad. Unfortunately, that is not the case.

Timberwolves at Clippers, 10:30pm: The Clippers have stopped being who we thought they were for a brief time, and are riding a two game winning streak. National media begins referring to them as "surging" in three... two... one...

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18 Comments:
Anonymous kazam92 said...
Lebron absolutely crapped the bed and STILL put up a decent line (19-10-7). FT's cost us. This was a very good game from both teams though.

Anonymous Karc said...
Stupid headline from ESPN: "Dirk, Mavs conspire to snap Heat's streak at 12."

Conspire, really? A 22-4 team at home needed some sort of advanced trickery to beat a team they already beat on the road weeks before? A team with 8 losses against good teams winning one on the road was supposed to happen, I guess.

Seriously, Jason Terry lit up the Heat in the 4th. Can't that be the headline. You know, something clever like "JET blows by/burns the Heat." But no, ESPN's chosen wang-sucking team needed a good team to CONSPIRE to beat them.

Anonymous Karc said...
Eh, my bad, Miami was the home team. But I stand by the rest of my stuff.

Blogger Dick Sullivan said...
Kazam's on meth. Good game? The Heat shot just above 40 percent and 68 percent from the line.

Just wanted to make sure you included the quote from Mr. Obvious:

"Two good teams playing and going back and forth the entire game," Heat coach Erik Spoelstra said.

Blogger stephanie g said...
Miami's problem in a nutshell: bigs can't post, smalls can't shoot. Their homecourt is more ike a neutral court. Will anyone call me nuts if I say that LeBron's athleticism is fading at the ripe old age of 25 (soon to be 26)? He seems lethargic. Can barely get past his defender anymore. Needs to make extra moves. Settles for jumpers more than ever. Even his decision making is slow. Everytime he gets the ball Miami is at risk of a shot clock violation.

The sequence where Miami got over 9000 offense boards was pretty funny. I wonder what the record for that in a single trip down the floor is.

Anonymous Mike Mai said...
here's walker's expression when he airballed in the d league: https://dl.dropbox.com/u/1682522/walker.jpg

Anonymous chapster said...
i know this isn't basketball related....but it's a great "ball" pic

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=3863958&id=94471021099

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Dick, I watched the whole game. If I wanna sound like a pessimist then both teams played like ass. Mavs started 23-10 then heat went on 17-0 run then mavs wet on 10-0 run...it was a game of runs


Stop looking at Stats for a goddamn change. It was a competitive game in the 2nd half with the lead flip-flopping. Jason Terry got hot and Heat missed a few looks down the stretch. It was a good fucking game K?

Anonymous kazam92 said...
and stephanie I think Lebrons hops are fine but his lack of a proper ball handle is noticeable. When has Lebron ever crossed anyone? He is used to bulldozing his way in and the Mavs prevented that today.

When Pat Riley sold his soul in 06.... I MEAN THE MAVS ARE A GOOD TEAM WHO OUTPLAYED US. NBA it's FAAAAAN-tastic

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Man, I wish I'd seen this game, sounds like a lot of drama surrounding it!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Lebron's athleticism is fine. The problem is that Wade is a weak outside shooter, Lebron is a weak outside shooter, Bosh tends not to shoot from outside 18 feet (except when the game is almost over), if Z isn't in the game, their center position is an offensive non-entity. 1 shooter is always on the court.

So this leaves 4 guys to cover the same area of paint. Lebron tries to bull rush his way in and suddenly there are 2 guys waiting for him. So he takes a jumper and (more often than not) clanks it.

Lebron's Cavs teams were always Lebron + multiple shooters. Fewer guys in the paint, more room for Lebron to charge--I mean rush--the paint. Side note: this is why national commentators (like Simmons) all notice that Lebron is "energized" when Wade goes off the court. It's not sharing the ball that's the problem as much as the fact that whoever comes on from Wade will be a better 3 point shooter, so Lebron suddenly gets more room to do his thing.

Either one of Lebron/Wade has to become a consistent 3 point shooter, or Lebron has to learn some post moves in order to stop this scheme.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
About PHO-ORL trade. You know that young guy like Carter can learn from a veteran like Hill. And Gortat can run, he was playing soccer in his young days (bad news is that: he start playing basketball at 20 or something)

Look at the bright side: Fans form Poland and France will be voting for Phonix players to all star games ;>

Blogger Preveen said...
I call major statcurse
http://www.nba.com/2010/news/features/fran_blinebury/12/20/24-second-thoughts/index.html

Quote :
"16 -- Uh-oh. Maybe they are good. The Heat just have to finish up 52-1 to still break the Bulls' record of 72 wins. Who's gonna beat them?"

Dammit!

Anonymous Czernobog said...
So the Spurs are likely to win at least 2 of their next 3 games, which would put them at 25-4, which would still probably not be enough to put them in the spotlight. after that they've got the Lakers at home. If they win that one and are still not touted as the team to beat the NBA coverage is officially retarded. And if they beat Dallas on the road after that and are still drawing less coverage than the "big 3" than the league coverage is officially braindead, take out the goddamn tube.

Anonymous Barry said...
I don't think the Spurs mind being out of the spotlight. Not that they can't handle the pressure but I can assume that working from the shadows has it advantages.

LeBron seems to settle for jumpers too often, he couldn't miss when I saw him burn the Knicks but seriously, when you are built like that, surely you gotta take it to the hoop just a little more often?

Anonymous Ian said...
"Coach Tim Thibodeau was asked Monday if the Bulls need to change their style without center Joakim Noah and possibly Taj Gibson. 'I don't think you do, because when you go into your season, you prepare for a lot of teams that go small,' he said. 'We prepared from training camp with Lu (Deng) and James (Johnson) at the four. SCAL (Brian Scalabrine) can go from three to four. We have three guys that are capable of swinging to a big position.' "

Really Tom, really? Does he seriously think he can play Scal regularly in his rotation? He knows him from his Boston years...

Anonymous No Ring King said...
Asking LeBron to post up is like asking Vince Carter to be aggressive or Andray Blatche to stop thinking he's a point guard. It makes complete sense and everyone else in the world can see it, but it's never going to happen.

At one point in the game last night, LeBron had Barea on him down on the block and immediately passed the ball.

I believe it was one of his "no-look" passes where he's looking at his teammate the whole time until snapping his head away halfway through his passing motion.

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
Spurs just manhandled Phoenix last night.. Suns would have lost by about 47 points more if it wasn't for Jared Dudley doing everything out there.

DeJuan Blair gets blocked at the rim far too much, he needs to learn some Millsapian/Boozerian moves to counteract that.

Great Bawful sequence last night: Gary Neal is scooting down to the corner, off the ball, with a Spurs big in the area - possibly Blair, possibly Duncan. Instead of letting his teammate guard Neal in the corner, Robin Lopez gently shoves him to guard the big, effectively calling a switch - for no discernible reason, as nobody was moving too quickly - saying "No no, I got Gary Neal". At the 3-point line. The next pass goes to Neal, he blows by Lopez on the baseline for the hoop and the harm.

Gee, you mean plodding Robin Lopez can't guard quick wings on the perimeter? Who knew?!?

FAIL.

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