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The Clippers can't even /facepalm properly

Hello, Thursday night! A couple news items from the Assocation. First, Allen Iverson is getting a divorce. I'll save my jokes until later when we learn more about what's going on with his daughter and so forth. Dude is a wreck right now, and I hate kicking someone when he's down.

Mavericks guard Jason Terry is going to undergo surgery tomorrow to repair a fractured orbital bone. Yes, he broke his face. Yes, I just shuddered thinking about that. And no, there is no truth to the rumor that his face was actually broken by Brittney Griner. She only punched one woman.

While this is completely not basketball related, I have to share this because it either a) the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life, or b) the most awesome thing I have ever heard in my life. Tim Burton is teaming up with "Wanted" director Timur Bekmambetov to do a cinematic adaption of the newly-released book Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.
"Lincoln" reimagines one of the great U.S. presidents as an axe-throwing, highly trained vampire assassin, promising to give new context to real historical events such as the Civil War and Lincoln's ascension to the White House . It begins with his mother's murder when he was still a young boy and his vow of revenge.
I am simultaneously disgusted and intrigued. It remains to be seen if Brian Scalabrine will play one of the vampires once his spray tan wears off. Also, DeShawn Stevenson's neck approves. No vampire's ever gonna bite that neck now.

And finally before we get to the bulk of the WOTN in Pictures, I caught this gem on the ESPN.com schedule.

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Apparently Celtics fans aren't happy Jordan is buying the Bobcats and are protesting

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

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Three opposing viewpoints on one play. Let's look at how they feel about this charging call...
Caron Butler: "C'mon! That was a blocking foul!"
Ryan Hollins: (mumbling something about brains since, based on his expression and pose, he apparently has somehow turned into a zombie)
Mustache Dude: "Beer man!"


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Damn is interim Clippers coach Kim Hughes boring. I miss Dumbleavy. :(


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Is it worth the millions of dollars to play for the Clippers?
(Who am I kidding? Of course it is)


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Hand in the face on defense? Why not try an entire body in the face?


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I will never know how Ray Allen was able to resist the temptation to deck Sheed at this very moment


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I haven't seen anybody strain like this since Joe Cocker sang With A Little Help From My Friends


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Few NBA players have as many consistently awesome facial expressions as Yi


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When you're down by 40, it's hard to look sad rather than just completely dumbfounded

Nationally Televised Games:
Lakers at Heat: For some reason, the Heat match up fairly well against the Lakers and have consistently played them close since last year. That doesn't mean they ever actually, you know, win. But at least they keep it close! Moral victories, folks. Moral victories.

Jazz at Suns: Uh oh. Phoenix in a TNT game. While they may have finally won one, their TNT record still sucks something awful.

All The Other Games:
Grizzlies at Bulls: Noah, Rose, and Deng are all out. The Bulls face seven teams with winning records in their next eight games, including the Mavs, Magic, and Crabs. Oh, boy.

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12 Comments:
Blogger BJ said...
Anything to the rumor that the reanimated remains of Michael Finley might sign with Boston?
-BJ

Blogger Ash said...
As a Celtic-hater, news like this makes me chuckle.

"Veteran swingman Michael Finley confirmed to ESPN.com on Thursday that he has reached an agreement to join the Boston Celtics.


"It's official now," Finley told ESPN.com after verbally committing to Boston. "I'm soon to be a Celtic."

Finley, who turns 37 Saturday, requested and received a buyout from the San Antonio Spurs earlier this week, freeing him to sign with a title contender while maintaining his playoff eligibility."

Pretty bawful.

Blogger Brian said...
"Few NBA players have as many consistently awesome facial expressions as Yi"

Probably, but Tim Duncan is not far behind.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
That Yi Jianlian picture is full of win

Blogger Will said...
Is it just me or does anyone else think it looks like Dwight is about to do the Harlem Shake in that pic?

Blogger Dan B. said...
Ash B -- Fuck.

Brian -- Indeed, Duncan is definately one of the top 5 awesome facial expression guys in the NBA. There's a reason he has his own Word of the Day entry.

Blogger chris said...
Phoenix shoots 56% and loses by 8.

Not exactly a stellar showing in their own paint.

Blogger chris said...
Oh yeah.

Charles Barkley in the post-game TNT discussion on what games the Nyets can win, after the suggestion that the Nyets can beat the paupers at Brendan Byrne:

"You're going against my man Paul Westphal!"

Charles's gonna have to share with Spencer Hawes!!!!!!

Blogger Silva said...
Season Split Averages
SPLIT G GS MPG FG% 3P% FT% OFF DEF RPG APG SPG BPG PPG

James

0 Days Rest 15 15 0.026 0.526 0.394 0.817 0.8 5.6 6.4 8.4 1.7 0.7 30.6
1 Days Rest 34 34 0.026 0.491 0.353 0.760 1.0 6.2 7.2 8.6 1.6 0.9 29.4
2 Days Rest 8 8 0.027 0.532 0.268 0.764 0.9 6.2 7.1 8.5 2.1 1.5 28.4
3 Days Rest 2 2 0.027 0.462 0.143 0.818 1.0 7.0 8.0 8.5 1.0 0.5 23.0
3+ Days Rest 3 3 0.023 0.513 0.333 0.769 1.0 7.3 8.3 9.0 1.7 2.7 39.0


Nash

0 Days Rest 15 15 0.031 0.503 0.408 0.909 0.5 1.9 2.4 9.4 0.8 0.1 17.7
1 Days Rest 34 34 0.030 0.500 0.430 0.951 0.5 2.9 3.4 11.7 0.5 0.2 15.4
2 Days Rest 11 11 0.028 0.547 0.405 0.941 0.5 3.5 4.1 12.4 0.2 0.1 21.9
3+ Days Rest 3 3 0.029 0.457 0.364 1.000 0.0 2.7 2.7 11.7 0.0 0.0 14.3


Kobe

0 Days Rest 14 14 0.025 0.462 0.355 0.817 0.8 4.3 5.1 4.9 1.9 0.1 29.9
1 Days Rest 29 29 0.026 0.460 0.273 0.829 0.9 4.1 5.0 4.7 1.6 0.4 25.8
2 Days Rest 10 10 0.025 0.433 0.341 0.788 1.4 4.5 5.9 5.2 1.4 0.4 29.3
3 Days Rest 2 2 0.031 0.512 0.333 0.857 1.5 3.5 5.0 5.0 2.5 0.0 24.5
3+ Days Rest 2 2 0.026 0.533 0.600 0.933 2.0 5.5 7.5 4.5 3.5 1.5 32.5


Wade

0 Days Rest 12 12 0.031 0.434 0.182 0.644 1.2 2.7 3.9 6.2 1.3 1.3 20.7
1 Days Rest 34 34 0.027 0.491 0.320 0.773 1.5 3.4 4.9 7.0 1.9 0.8 28.1
2 Days Rest 7 7 0.028 0.435 0.333 0.780 1.1 2.3 3.4 6.3 2.4 2.0 24.9
3 Days Rest 1 1 0.026 0.483 0.333 0.923 2.0 3.0 5.0 5.0 3.0 1.0 41.0
3+ Days Rest 4 4 0.028 0.405 0.222 0.786 1.8 5.0 6.8 5.2 1.2 0.5 24.8


Bosh

0 Days Rest 12 12 0.029 0.480 0.200 0.814 3.0 8.4 11.4 1.8 0.8 0.8 24.1
1 Days Rest 27 27 0.027 0.528 0.500 0.787 3.3 7.8 11.1 2.5 0.6 1.2 24.9
2 Days Rest 9 9 0.027 0.555 0.000 0.786 2.8 9.6 12.3 2.4 1.0 1.0 23.0
3 Days Rest 3 3 0.027 0.690 0.000 0.677 1.3 9.0 10.3 2.3 0.0 1.3 26.3
3+ Days Rest 2 2 0.024 0.436 0.000 0.864 2.5 10.5 13.0 3.0 0.0 1.0 26.5


Shaquille

0 Days Rest 12 12 0.043 0.483 0.000 0.492 1.7 4.8 6.4 1.5 0.7 0.8 9.5
1 Days Rest 30 30 0.043 0.597 0.000 0.500 2.0 4.7 6.7 1.5 0.2 1.4 12.8
2 Days Rest 6 6 0.043 0.604 0.000 0.645 1.3 5.2 6.5 2.0 0.3 1.0 13.0
3 Days Rest 1 1 0.048 0.500 0.000 0.400 4.0 5.0 9.0 2.0 0.0 1.0 12.0
3+ Days Rest 4 4 0.037 0.511 0.000 0.200 0.5 7.0 7.5 0.5 0.0 1.2 12.2


Jermaine O'Neal

0 Days Rest 14 14 0.036 0.504 0.000 0.525 1.9 5.4 7.3 1.0 0.2 1.2 11.5
1 Days Rest 28 28 0.034 0.539 0.000 0.778 2.1 5.4 7.4 1.6 0.4 1.5 14.7
2 Days Rest 7 7 0.035 0.500 0.000 0.682 1.7 5.9 7.6 1.7 0.6 1.3 11.0
3 Days Rest 4 4 0.033 0.477 0.000 0.667 1.2 4.5 5.8 0.5 0.0 2.0 11.0
3+ Days Rest 4 4 0.033 0.667 0.000 0.714 1.2 6.2 7.5 1.5 0.5 1.0 18.2


Ben Wallace

0 Days Rest 17 17 0.033 0.507 0.000 0.417 4.1 5.2 9.3 1.5 1.2 1.2 5.2
1 Days Rest 25 25 0.035 0.537 0.000 0.405 3.6 5.4 9.0 1.6 1.2 1.3 5.3
2 Days Rest 13 13 0.033 0.500 0.000 0.379 3.5 5.4 8.8 1.8 1.4 1.2 4.2
3 Days Rest 2 2 0.028 0.667 0.000 0.400 4.5 4.5 9.0 2.5 1.0 1.0 12.0
3+ Days Rest 3 3 0.040 0.583 0.000 0.250 2.3 7.3 9.7 1.0 0.7 1.0 5.7


Dirk

0 Days Rest 16 16 0.025 0.449 0.208 0.863 0.9 7.3 8.2 2.0 1.0 0.9 26.1
1 Days Rest 30 29 0.027 0.494 0.324 0.920 0.9 6.2 7.1 2.9 0.9 0.9 24.4
2 Days Rest 8 8 0.027 0.486 0.500 0.968 0.9 6.9 7.8 2.6 0.8 1.6 26.5
3 Days Rest 5 5 0.026 0.531 0.800 0.867 0.8 8.4 9.2 2.0 1.0 1.4 23.2
3+ Days Rest 2 2 0.027 0.404 0.333 0.947 2.0 7.0 9.0 3.5 0.0 1.0 29.0


At least offensively I see no diference from resting or not resting. Are back to backs really that difficult?

Blogger zyth said...
yeah,Randolph holds the new record for doubledobules/season with 43 for memphis. where art thou,Pau?always thought he was kind of a good rebounder for his whiteguy squishiness

Blogger Basketbawful said...
At least offensively I see no diference from resting or not resting. Are back to backs really that difficult?

The thing that tends to suffer most is team play down the stretch. It won't be obvious from most basic stats. But take the Suns last night. They were on fire for three quarters and then fell apart in the fourth.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
That was just the Suns classically sucking.