heat bench
Is...is Zydrunas Ilgauskas even awake? It's time for Erick Dampier!

The Miami Heat: When the Heat opened the season at 6-4, the experts were quick to point out that their losses had come to the Celtics (twice), Hornets and Jazz.

Sure, Miami was only beating bad teams -- but we were told that beating bad teams matters. That, in fact, bitch-slapping crap teams is "the second-most predictive attribute of 'final four' success." In other words, beating the hell out of the Clippers and Timberwolves actually increases a team's chances of making it to the Conference Finals or NBA Finals.

Assuming the math is correct -- and math never lies -- what does it mean when the crap teams start beating YOU?

That's what we need to start asking about the Miami Heat. Two days removed from a 97-95 loss to the Grizzlies in Memphis, the Heat got their asses straight up whupped 93-77.

At home.

By the Indiana Pacers.

And get this: Danny Granger, Indy's best player, was 6-for-21 from the field. For the game, the Pacers shot only 41 percent and had a 38-13 disadvantage in free throw attempts. That's right: Miami got 25 more free throw attempts...and lost by 16.

Again, the whole "no inside presence" thing killed Miami. The Pacers outrebounded them 48-39 and outscored them 38-18 in the paint. And according to TrueHoop: "Miami’s big men scored a season-low 18 points in the paint and grabbed just 14 percent of missed shots on the offensive end, both of which were well below their season averages entering the game."

I'm not done: The Heat shot 38 percent from the field, went 4-for-20 from downtown, bricked 13 free throws and gave up 23 points off 22 turnovers.

Those are Clippers numbers, people.

To highlight Miami's struggles from beyond the arc: LeBron James (2-for-8), Eddie House (0-for-5), Dwyane Wade (0-for-4), James Jones (0-for-1).

But wait, there's more: Udonis Haslem needs surgery to repair a torn foot ligament and be out indefinitely. And according to ESPN's Tom Haberstroh, "It's time for Erick Dampier."

This is what it's come to? Miami's season is on the line and their best option is a 34-year-old center who was limited in his best days and last season compiled a playoff PER of 3.7?

Here's even more of a reality check from Wild Yams:

- Dampier is only 40 days younger than Big Z

- Dampier has actually played in 76 more NBA games than Z has

- Z has been in two All-Star Games while Dampier has never been in one

- Last year's stats for the two players: Z - 7.4 ppg, 5.4 rpg, .8 bpg Dampier - 6.0 ppg, 7.3 rpg, 1.4 bpg
That sound you just heard was the pained cries of Heat fans everywhere. It sounded kinda like this...

The most bawful sequence of the night was transcribed by Basketbawful reader Paul in last night's BAD comments:

At one point in the third quarter things got really weird for the Heat.

Dwade gets a tech for arguing a call. And you could see it, He was PISSED.

A couple of possessions later, he is wide open waiting for a LBJ pass, LeBron instead looks for Ilgauzkas but his pass gets intercepted.

One possession later Ilgauskas turns the ball over and on the following possession Wade is --again-- open waiting for LeBron's Pass, again LeBron gives the ball to Ilgauskas on the elbow for a missed 18-footer.

At this point you could see it. Dwade was in FUCK THIS SHIT mode. One possession later Wade has LeBron open but he jacks up a contested 3 instead.

On the next possession LeBron takes the FUCK THIS SHIT to a whole new level and retaliates by launching three consecutive 3 pointers.

The whole sequence was kind of surreal, it was my dream come true. Watching the Heat destroy itself against a sub-par team!
This description missed a few possessions here and there, but it hit the salient points. These guys are not in synch. Two Alpha Dogs and an Alpha Dog wanna be without a strong coach that can force them to get their shit together. Speaking of which...

...Basketbawful reader kazam92 wants me to advertise the Fire Erik Spoelstra Web site and participate in voting. I can do the first but not the second. This is way too much fun.

And now I present the Miami Heat-related Rant of the Night by stephanie g:

The refs tried really hard but the Miami cheat sucked too bad even for their usual extra bench to be of much use. LeFraud Shames and D-Whistle are just unintelligent clowns who don't know how to play basketball -- maybe they lost out on their HGH connection? LeCrab's "goto" move is an offensive foul. He's one of the biggest front runners ever. STD Wade is hurt I guess. But if he's that off why is he playing? He looked like he didn't even care. Maybe LeBrick's winning attitude is rubbing off?

And is Bosh really gonna chuck 20 footers and look like a wounded giraffe all season long? If so, that's a flagrant foul against the game of basketball. Too bad LeBron never developed a post up game, huh? Or off ball movement. Or a pullup game. Or...well, anything that doesn't involve him holding the ball for half the shot clock and sponging stats from his team.

OK, OK, I'm sorry. That wasn't very adult of me. But seriously, they had a 38-13 FT advantage. And we just clobbered them despite the fact Hibbert only played 21 minutes because of foul trouble, Collison didn't play much because of his injury, and Granger went 6-21 (played some nice D though). The Cheats had the game gift wrapped for them and they STILL wilted.

I might be enjoying this Frankstein experiment a little too much, especially if they do somehow end up turning it around. But you have to admit, this could potentially be an ALL TIME bawful story. I mean, LeBron and Wade are (supposedly) premier talents, but they just disappeared this season in their prime. They may as well have died in car crashes, as far as Stern is concerned. Well, I guess everyone will be tuning in to root for whoever they're playing, so maybe he doesn't care.
Dwyane Wade, Worst Player of the Night: From TrueHoop:

After missing one game with a sprained wrist, Dwyane Wade suffered through the worst shooting night of his career, missing 12 of 13 shots (7.7 percent) from the field and finishing with just three points.

Not only was it the worst performance of his career, his line (1-13 from floor, 1-5 on free throws) was also one of the worst in NBA history.

Only one other player took at least 13 shots from the floor and attempted at least five free throws, and made one or fewer of each: On November 27, 1951, Max Zaslofsky of the Knicks was 1-13 from the floor and 0-5 from the line in an 83-81 loss at the Philadelphia Warriors.
Said Erik Spoelstra: "A tough night for Dwyane. But we've been around him long enough. He always finds a way to bounce back. Getting his health is the priority, first of all. But secondly, we know that he's very introspective as a professional athlete. That's the way I want all of our guys in the locker room to be."

One assumes Spoelstra said this while thumbing through the "Help Wanted" section of the Miami Herald.

coach spo
"Coach Spo" knows what's coming.

LeBron James, quote machine, Part 1: "We're not having fun right now."

Link courtsey of Basketbawful reader Clifton.

LeBron James, quote machine, Part 2: "What we're lacking are two things: That is fun and a little bit of swagger right now."

hawks bench

The Atlanta Hawks: The Boston Celtics were coming off back-to-back losses to the Kevin Durant-less Thunder and the Toronto Craptosaurs. Rajon Rondo was out with a leg injury, and Jermaine O'Neal and Kendrick Perkins are still on the shelf. So The C's were a vulnerable team, right? This was a chance for the Hawks to prove they're for real, right?

Instead, the Dirty Birds fell behind 39-13 after 12 minutes, trailed by as many as 33 points and eventually lost 99-76.

The game was in Atlanta, by the way.

During that first quarter blitzkrieg, the Celtics shot 18-for-25 while the Hawks were going 4-for-17. Atlanta coach Larry Drew called three timeouts. He would have called 20 if he'd had 'em. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if the pen for his dry erase board probably ran out of ink. After all, nothing else was working.

And here's the reality check time: The Hawks are 8-6. But check it. Their eight wins have been against the Grizzlies, Sixers, Wizards, Cavaliers, Pistons, Timberwolves (twice) and Pacers. Their losses have been to the Suns, Magic, Bucks, Jazz, Mavericks and Celtics.

But hey, at least Atlanta is beating bad teams. That matters.

Joe Johnson: When the Hawks signed Joe Cool to that six-year, $119 million contract last summer, we all knew they'd regret it. We just didn't know it would be this soon. After last night's 2-for-10 shooting performance against the Celtics, Johnson is 15-for-48 over his last four games.

Larry Drew, coach of the year candidate, Part 1: "This was very embarrassing. Very, very embarrassing. Very embarrassing. If I had one word to sum it up: embarrassing."

Larry Drew, coach of the year candidate, Part 2: "We're not coming out ready to play. I'm not seeing any urgency. I'm not seeing any passion. We're not playing like we want it. We're not playing hard enough. It's very, very disturbing."

Larry Drew, coach of the year candidate, Part 3: "I don't know what we're doing the night before the game. But something is going on that is not allowing us to play with energy or passion. I'm going to find out what it is."

Larry Drew, coach of the year candidate, Part 4: "Everyone is getting their rest. I don't think that's an issue. We've just got to get back to sharing the basketball and playing together."

Kevin Garnett, quote machine: "I wish we could bottle this and put it on the shelf or something."

The Minnesota Timberwolves: Damn. Minnesota just can't catch a break. First the Vikings fire Brad Childress about two years too late and then both Kevin Durant and Jeff Green returned to the Oklahoma City lineup in time for a home game against the Timberwolves.

Believe it or not, Kevin Love hit a layup to give Minny a 105-104 lead with 1:20 left in the fourth. But the final score (117-107) pretty much tells you how things went from there. Not to steal the Clippers' thing, but the T-Wolves are who...well, you know.

Michael Beasley: In case you didn't hear, Ron Artest said Beastley was dumb and needed to become a winner. Mikey replied: "The reason I do the same thing is because they can't stop it. As soon as they stop it, I'll do something else."

Last night, Beastly went 7-for-20 (including 0-for-3 from downtown), committed a team-high 5 turnovers, and pulled a Harry Houdini down the stretch. Way to prove Artest wrong, Mike.

The Houston Rockets: Steve Nash returned to the Phoenix lineup in time to drop The Daryl's Rejects to 3-10 on the year. That includes a 1-4 mark in Houston.

The Suns shot 54 percent from the field and three-point land...and even earned 38 free throw attempts to only 15 for the Rockets.

Said Kyle Lowry: "We have to find a way to keep our heads up. We are 3-10, but we are not a 3-10 team. We are way better than that."

Hm. 28th in Opponents PPG, 27th in Defensive Rating...I dunno, Kyle. I think those are the hallmarks of a 3-10 team. Although, in all fairness, the Rockets are without Aaron Brooks (sprained left ankle) and Yao Ming (slowly crumbling body).

The Phoenix Suns: Way to make this game more exciting than it needed to be by giving up 40 points in the fourth quarter, Suns. You also got outrebounded 51-33 and outscored 62-42 in the paint. No wonder you're the most underachieving team in basketball. Congrats!

The Orlando Magic: Well, huh. Maybe the Spurs are for real.

The Sacramento Kings: Let's see: 35 percent shooting, seven missed free throws, -8 in turnovers, -13 in points off turnovers, -16 in points in the paint, -14 in fast break points. The final score (94-83) makes this game look reasonably close, but Utah led by as many as 25 and the Paupers had to outscore the Jazz 27-16 in the fourth quarter to make the outcome look semi-respectable.

That's eight losses in the last nine games for the once 3-1 Kings. Sorry, Chris.

Matt Harpring, unintentionally dirty quote machine: Regarding Krylo Fesenko via Basketbawful reader Austen: "He really clogged up the Middle and got his hands on a lot of balls."

The Golden State Warriors: Six games ago, they were a surprising 6-2 and generating a little buzz. Now? They're 7-7 and the only buzzing is from the flies circling the corpse of their impressive start. And what can you say? This team is ranked 26th in Defensive Rating and only 21st in Offensive Rating.

They just aren't that good.

The New Orleans Hornets: After the Hornets beat the Kings on Sunday night, New Orleans coach Monty Williams said: "At this point in the season I don't even look at the standings. I had no idea we would have this kind of record. Looking at our record, it might be fools' gold."

I copied that quote into my notebook knowing full the Hornets were playing the Clippers in L.A. the very next night. It felt like prophecy.

Sure enough, the Clippers beat the Hornets.

I said "the Clippers beat the Hornets."

I said...never mind.

I don't know what's weirder. That the Clips snapped a nine-game winning streaks by beating one of the league's best teams, or that they managed to pull off a rare victory despite bricking 17 friggin' free throws. Total chaos. Ultimate bawful.

Trevor Ariza: From Basketbawful reader LotharBot: "Trevor Ariza is clutch for the Clippers tonight! (Yes, I typed that correctly.)"

Explanation: With 21 seconds left and his team (the Hornets in cased you missed LotharBot's sarcasm) down 90-88, Ariza stepped to the free throw line for two shots.



Blake Griffin: Watch that potty mouth, Blake. You never know when one of Bill Simmons' kids might be in the crowd.

Chris's lacktion report:

Wolves-Thunder: Wayne Ellington sounded a single turnover in 7:26 for a +1 suck differential while Lazar Hayward and Kosta Koufos shared a portobello in two seconds as SUPER MARIO BROTHERS!

Magic-Spurs: Ryan Anderson took ten seconds to power up his Famicom for a Mario, matched by San Antonio's Tiago Splitter, making them Mario Brothers From Different Mothers.

Kings-Jazz: Kyrylo Fesenko found a way to forget about a field goal and a pair of boards in 14:36, by fouling four times and losing the rock once for a 5:4 Voskuhl. Gordon Hayward then cashed in his valuable Cannonball Adderley vinyl rarities collection to the tune of a cool 4.3 trillion (4:17).

Hornets-Clippers: Jason Smith sired four fouls against a board and field goal in 13:57 to buzz into Voskuhl territory with a 4:3 ratio; Pops Mensah-Bonsu had a triplet of fouls in 1:17 for a +3!

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Blogger draftaraujo said...
I think someone should point out that each of Joe's baskets cost $99539 each last night, and each basket over the last five games $66539, because hey, what is JJ really good at besides scoring.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Bonus Bawful: Kid from IPFW wears boxing helmet during basketball games due to inability to control his recklessness, via 4 concussions in 1 season. Not that protecting yourself is bawful (the pictures are funny however), but the fans heckling him chose instead to make fun of his red hair.

Blogger Will said...
Man I didn't even know Matt Harpring was still in the league.

Anonymous Jordan said...
@Will, He's now a play by play guy for Jazz TV games.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Is this not the absolute best bawful season we've had since bawful hit the air? It's a veritable cornucopia of terrible ball.

Anonymous Aaron said...
Hmmm...since many of us DON'T like the Heat,shouldn't we start a KEEP Erik Spoelstra Web site?

Anonymous Hellshocked said...
Darko scored 21 points last night. He's averaging 2.8 blocks for the season, tied for first. I'm not gonna say this is the year he figures it out, since his problem has never really been one of skill or ability so much as a shitty attitude and a complete lack of heart (neither of which tend to improve dramatically 7 years into one's career) but it's hard to say with the team's (relative) improved play he hasn't been worth the paycheck so far this season. He's averaging 8 poinbts, 6 rebounds, 2 assists and he's a tall, strong, shotblocking center, which lets Minnesota use Kevin Love at the 4 and Michael Beasley at the 3.

Part of the reason for his 3 game mini-tear has been Minnesota treating him with kiddie gloves for the past 2 seasons and making sure to keep him involved in the offense as frequently as possible, so we'll see how long it lasts. I'd love for Darko to finally become a consistent quality player, but I'm guessing it will be back to business as usual the next time he doesn't get 10, 12 touches.

Anonymous Czernobog said...
@BadDave: I voiced a similar thought not too long ago. Just when you think things couldn't get more Bawful, and then you get something like this:


Which to be fair isn't even as awesome as LeBawl saying he isn't having fun.

Anyway, Bawful, how about including the last 2:30 minutes of the Spurs-Magic game? The magic were actually up by a point when the Spurs (mostly Manu Ginobili) went on a 12-2 run.


Also, Vince Carter left the game, I think his water broke or something.
Also, check out the photos on NBA.com for "Ball."

Anonymous Czernobog said...
Holy shit, the reboot of "Twins" looks awesome:


Anonymous Stockton said...
Don't complain about Heat's lack of inside presence.
Magloire and Howard already averaged double digits and 9 to 10 rebounds per game, so they can do it again!!
When they become 100% you'll see...

Anonymous Stockton said...
How to build a championship team 101:

1) get a superstar, who can score and take over games. Check.

2) get a super sidekick. If Robin is as good as Batman, he must be humble enough to take a smaller role (like Gasol) and don't bitch about it. uh uh...

3) get a reliable PG who can run offense (yes, Fisher is a liability, but he CAN run an offense). Arroyo + Chalmers?

4) get inside presence. I know, I know, the Bulls won 6 titles with no inside presence... really? Let's not forget Rodman, besides a tenacious defender and ugly as hell, was the BEST rebounder in the league.

5) get role players who... know their role. Horry, Fox, Kukoc, Longley... In the Heat, what, Ilgauskas, Haslem and Mike Miller?

6) get an hard-a$$ coach to put everything in place.

Too many bricks missing in that building, sorry...

It doesn't mean the Heat won't win it all... after all they DO have some of the man power, and that FT advantage is always a good sign...

Anonymous JJ said...
Czernobog, I saw a highlight on NBA.com where Vince makes a decent spin move for a lay up. But then, he starts limping and has that "Mommy, I'm hurting so bad" face even though it seemed like there wasn't much contact on the play. To me, his face was better than the play. Usually, guys get pumped up after a tough lay up, but leave it to Carter to get all crybaby instead.

Regarding Heat, it seems like LeBron forgot he signed on WADE's team. How funny it'd be if LeBron continues to not have fun and becomes so disruptive in the locker room Heat will have to trade him? Unlikely, but it'd be great.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Darko's always been able to block shots like a mofo, given the chance of course.

Minnesota has compiled this list of specialists as a team (Love rebounds, Brewer steals, Flynn turnovers lol, and SFs), and everyone outside of Darko seems okay to chuck it up from 3. They have become my statistical team to follow, since the Miami Easy Buttons are losing their shit.

I'st too bad Wesley Johnson seems better at the 3, as does Beasley at the 4. We'll see how Rambis handles it, as Kahn attempts to unbumble his Webster misstep atleast.

How about trading Dragic for Rubio? Or is it bad to put a Serbian, Slovenian, and Montenegran (sp??) on the same team? (Wasn't this the reason Pekovic got that contact?) Bleh whatever.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I still really don't see what there is to hate about the Heat, other than their terrible basketball playing. Is it Miami? Miami has shitty weather outside of the winter and retarded traffic, but it's not really worth hating. Misanthropy provides me with enough hate to feed on and trust me, there are far higher value targets for hate than King Crab, even considering the stupid shit he often says.

Also, the Warriors desperately need David Lee. They aren't that much better with him, but without him, they are seriously one of the great perpetrators of basketball crimes.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
After reading all that smack talk about Big Z I expected him to have a miserable night- checking the box score and he had 12pts on 8 shots, 4 blocks, 8 boards in only 22min. Only 2 turnovers. Not bad especially considering his teammates (Wade: 5, James: 6).

Mayhap Big Z isn't really a problem? After all, his health is improving and he is also finding his place on this team where shots are tough to come by.

Why the haterade?

Anonymous Czernobog said...
Misanthropy provides me with enough hate to feed on and trust me, there are far higher value targets for hate than King Crab, even considering the stupid shit he often says.

In basketball? Like who? Considering the Kobe hatred is kinda played out on this blog.

Also, speaking as an Israeli - Ra'anan Katz. The guy's an irritating prick.

Also, anyone who follows non-american football will be familiar with the term "Galacticos." It invariably invites scorn.

Blogger Michael Hsu said...
What I don't understand is why Lebron is so bad. The dude is 6-9 and 250 pounds. He HIMSELF should play center. Physically he is all there. He jumps higher than everyone else and is big enough to beat the crap out of anyone who wanders in there. He just such a baby he doesn't have all the skills to be anyone except a decent passer and a driver.

O wait I forgot he doesn't know how to play inside the key!

Blogger Basketbawful said...
I still really don't see what there is to hate about the Heat, other than their terrible basketball playing.

This is pretty simple. Those three players colluding, er, combining their talents on one team offended peoples' sense of equity and fairness (nobody likes team-stacking), which itself is a form of jealousy. Either you're allied with the biggest badass or you want that badass to fail and fall to ensure your team a better chance of winning. It's an extension of our survival instinct.

Similar feelings were evoked when the Celtics "stole" KG from the Timberwolves (although Boston giving away a 20-10 guy, a $13 million expiring contract, four other players and two first rounders hardly constituted grand theft athlete) and especially when the Grizzlies gave Pau Gasol to the Lakers.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
That's revisionist history. There was not nearly the amount of hurt-vagina behavior among basketball fans when KG went to the Celtics or when Pau went to the Lakers. With Pau, it was all Chris Wallace jokes and hate towards the Grizzlies. I think it's a mix of jealousy and hypocrisy.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
After reading all that smack talk about Big Z I expected him to have a miserable night- checking the box score and he had 12pts on 8 shots, 4 blocks, 8 boards in only 22min. Only 2 turnovers. Not bad especially considering his teammates (Wade: 5, James: 6).

Mayhap Big Z isn't really a problem? After all, his health is improving and he is also finding his place on this team where shots are tough to come by.

Why the haterade?

Oh, I don't hate Zydrunas. He doesn't deserve the full blame for Miami's inside weakness, and he certainly isn't their biggest problem, which is that the fears about whether 'Bron and Wade could co-exist has been justified in the early going.

I made this point in a previous comments section. Over the past three or four seasons, the Cavaliers and Heat have been among the slowest teams in basketball because LeBron and D-Wade prefer to walk the ball up and isolate while everybody stands around and watches them. Experience has taught them that that is how basketball is played. But it's not. It's really not.

Take the Lakers. They're at their worst when Kobe is isolating and at their best when the ball is moving around. Trust me, that team would be a mess if Phil Jackson hadn't been coaching it all this time. And even then, he had to leave and come back and then let Kobe nearly kill himself trying to outscore other teams before the Mamba was (mostly) broken. And even then, Mitch Kupchak had to assemble the right talent around Kobe...including Gasol, who, I'm sorry, is the Lakers' best player this season.

Who's going to break LeBron and Wade? Riley? Maybe. And if that happens, will the Heat have enough talent to take down Boston and L.A.? I guess we'll see.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Maybe when those players signed for Boston and LA, they weren't gigantic douchebags about it, and they started winning and everyone forgot about it, so this situation in Miami is still unique.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
That bit about the Lakers being at their worst when Kobe is isolating reminded me of just a spectacularly awful possession by the Heat in the second quarter I think it was. I'm pretty sure Dwyane Wade was on the bench at the time but they gave Lebron the ball at the left 3point win where the entire Heat team stood around without moving an inch while Lebron held the ball for about 8 seconds, made a dribble move to try to force his way past two defenders, walked, turnover. Classic.

Blogger XForce23 said...
In response to the Bosh part of stephanie's rant: yes. Welcome to the Chris Bosh show. If you were expecting anything else from Bosh, then that makes me giggle. Love how Bosh can't hide here anymore and everyone can see what type of player he is.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
That's revisionist history. There was not nearly the amount of hurt-vagina behavior among basketball fans when KG went to the Celtics or when Pau went to the Lakers.

It's not revisionist anything. I said the feelings were similar, not equal. The KG trade got the least bashing because 1) he was traded, after all, to a team that had been truly horrible, 2) he and Ray-Ray were past their primes, and 3) people genuinely felt sorry for the guy.

With Pau, it was all Chris Wallace jokes and hate towards the Grizzlies.

Now THAT is revisionist history. People were PISSED about the Gasol trade. Some people still are. Know what Spurs coach Gregg Popovich had to say about it? Here's what he told Sports Illustrated:

"What they did in Memphis is beyond comprehension. There should be a trade committee that can scratch all trades that make no sense. I just wish I had been on a trade committee that oversees NBA trades. I would have voted no to that LA trade."


"When told that Wallace had challenged executives to criticize the deal publicly, Popovich replied, 'Well, there you go. I'm on the record.'"

And here was George Karl's follo up:

"I'm with Pop on the Gasol trade. [The Nuggets media relations director] told me about the trade, I said 'the league can't let that happen. There's no way.' That's not going to happen. I swear, I said 'there's no way that's happening.' It was like a gift -- Christmas come early. It was a surprise package underneath the tree."

And Steve Nash? Here:

"It's tough to say you're a contender when you look at the Lakers. The Gasol thing changed everything. Any team in the playoffs that was given Pau Gasol and didn't really have to give up anything, that would have a big impact on your team. I think anyone else [with Gasol] would be sitting in the position the Lakers are in now, too."

Bill Simmons:

"The Lakers fleecing Memphis for Pau Gasol in a horribly one-sided trade that would have caused complete chaos in any of my fantasy leagues. (Bare minimum: Three weeks of angry e-mails, phone calls and message-board posts, followed by the guy who traded Gasol deciding to "leave" the league.)"

I could go on and on, but believe me, vaginas around the world were screaming in pain and disbelief for YEARS after the Gasol trade.

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
I still really don't see what there is to hate about the Heat

I can't speak for others, but for myself, the reasons are quite simple and understandable.

1) The way in which LeDouche announced his decision. In the most arrogant, self-serving way possible.

2) The general sense of preening entitlement emanating from Miami. The fact that you actually have to go through the formality of playing the games seems like a rude wake-up call to these three.

3) Chris Bosh's comments that "it doesn't matter if it's not on TV". I didn't know people that weren't severely mentally retarded could say things that stupid. Proved me wrong!

3a) Bosh's, in general, weak, apathetic and dispassionate play. You got what you wanted, the big stage and all that, and now mostly you're going to drift around and jack up jumpers from outside? Dude was more engaged in Toronto. A waste.

4) LeDouche's followup commercial. What should you do? Not be a douche, and not have an hour-long TV special so we can all bask in your arrogance while you poop on an already dying rust belt city.

I don't care that they "stacked their team" or whatever. I think most of the sour grapes coming from the likes of Charles Barkley are sheer hypocrisy. Larry Bird and Magic Johnson had lists of Hall of Fame and All-Star teammates too long to count. Yes, they were assembled through the draft or whatnot instead of agreeing to sign with the same team; so, who cares?

The SuperFriends just put out a general vibe that epitomizes everything that is wrong with some of the players coming into the league these days. Namely, it's about being flashy and famous and getting yours, as opposed to quietly busting your ass in the gym to get better and fix the holes in your gym in order to annihilate the competition. LeBron: 2-8 from three. Why is a guy who can't really shoot taking 8 threes in a blowout? 'Nuff said.

Anonymous Barry said...
I voiced a similar sentiment too, regarding this season's sheer heights in Bawful.

You better get started on the Worsties early this season Bawful, otherwise all the Bawful will pile up to never before seen heights!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I was speaking about more than just you when I referred to "people." And also that's what I was talking about as far as making fun of Chris Wallace and being angry at the Grizzlies. My point is still valid, nobody gave the ire to Pau Gasol the player or the Lakers.

Blogger Unknown said...
As for the Heat's problems, they're, like Stockton wrote, they're never going to be great until they figure their roles. And it looks like either Wade or LeBron will have to concede Alpha-dog status at some point. And since LBJ is more suited to the PG and facilitator position, it would appear that Wade would better fit handling scoring duties and taking that top-dog role. Until that happens, until LBJ realizes his super-Pippen (in fact, until he's just regular Pippen), then he's never going to win a lot with Wade.

The problem is how does Lebron relegate himself to the sidekick role when he's so determined to make a fortune off of his "alpha-dog" image. Jordan, Magic, and Bird were in all the Nike and McDonald's commercials, not Pippen, Worthy, and McHale.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Pau never promised 8+ championships, never used the phrase "easy button", why are we even comparing this anymore?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I guess "basketball fans," not "people." The Pau situation is a bad example anyway, although Pau obviously didn't want to spend more than another second in Memphis if he didn't have to. And statements like that from the other chris further convince me that peoples' emotions are misplaced and derive more from imagined slights than real ones.

Anonymous Hellshocked said...

Darko has had stretches where he blocks a ton of shots and rebounds at a decent clip (Orlando comes to mind) but they seem to coincide with stretches where he also gets to shoot the ball a lot. Even Ben Wallace liked being involved in the offense, but with Darko it seems that if he doesn't touch the ball 3 consecutive trips down the court (or the coach calls him out for something or the media brings up the #2 pick thing or he misses an easy put back or someone in the crowd whispers something that he feels might vaguely be about him) he just mopes. It's a shame because he IS big, strong, athletic and relatively skilled. Does he have the record by now for most consecutive seasons where he is "about to get it" or does that still belong to Dampier?

I think it's debatable if Beasley is better at the 4 than the 3. He is an equally poor defender at both positions, a terrible rebounder at the power forward and his post game consists of fade aways. He might have an easier time getting by guys at the PF but he rarely bothers to do that anyway. He's also not likely to ever play the 4 in Minnesota, at least not unless they decide to play tiny ball when Martell Webster gets back (which would be hilarious) so its a bit of a moot point.

I've never gotten the hype with this guy or why people kept saying he has "superstar potential" (a phrase that is thrown around far too frequently for my liking). At best, he is a rich man's Antawn Jamieson, but with an attitude problem and an aversion to rebounding. Yes he can score a ton of points (at an inefficient rate) but Artest wasn't wrong when he called him one-dimensional. I wouldn't even call him selfish, he just has a very low basketball IQ.

@The Other Chris:

I would add to that list the sickening adulation the media has brandished upon the Heat since the collusion: 72 wins, a championship guaranteed, no consecutive losses this season, a dynasty, Lebron looking "fierce" in practice, etc without so much as a pre-season game under their belts and despite the fact the problems plaguing the team now were evident to anyone who took a look at their final roster two months ago. The Decision soured me on Miami, but the media's almost unanimous complicity is what made me truly hate them.

Anonymous Czernobog said...
@Ultra-Misanthrope: OK, you're clearly just fucking with us now. No one is that obtuse.

Anonymous Aaron said...
You can say whatever you want about Kobe, Gasol, KG, and Ray Allen. But we know those dudes have been working hard improving their games and continue to do so. You definitely cannot say that about LeDouche, and yeah, no one gives a damn about Bosh.

Like the other Chris said. If The Decision didn't happen and LeDouche were improving his game all summer and the Heat were now 14-0, there wouldn't be as much hate. But of course, he wanted life to be easy but didn't want to push the easy button. What should he do?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
@Czernobog: Did you have real point to make or are you just trying to be an asshole?

Blogger Will said...
Czernoblog- I have 2 words for you: VIVA MADRID!

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
Well, I can only speak for myself, not for the "people".

Also, it's not Pau's fault that Chris Wallace has a learning disability. Your "point" in that case is heroically invalid, you're comparing apples and oranges.

As Czernobog pointed out, you're just trolling now. I gave a list of perfectly logical reasons why I find the Heat distasteful. You rebutt none of them, and continue yammering on about Pau Gasol, that no one begrudges for reasons which are also perfectly logical.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I have nothing against Pau and like him very much as a player. It was a poor example to which I admitted as much. I hardly yammered on about him.

I'm not trolling, and I don't really feel like arguing about a team I don't even like that much anyway. If you want to delude yourself into believing all of your hate is perfectly logical, feel free.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
I have nothing against Pau and like him very much as a player. It was a poor example to which I admitted as much.

And, frankly, I should have specified that the ire wasn't directed at Pau so much as at the Lakers for "unfairly" gaining an advantage by trading for him. But then, the Lakers -- by dent of their winning tradition and general douchiness -- were kinda hated anyway.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
FIrst off thanks to Bawful for putting up firespo.com (BUT VOTE PLEASE!!!)

Listen fellas, I've watched every game. Bosh isn't the problem, nor should he be the scapegoat. He started slow but frankly, he's the only reliable iso scorer on the team. Why complain about him shooting jumpers when he's so damn good at it? He was among league leaders last yr in long 2's and I bet he is this yr as well. His rebounding is getting up as well and he is drawing fouls at a high rate. Yeah he's a perimeter PF at heart, but I've accepted that. He compliments Wade OR Lebron well.

Around 2008-09 when the idea of wade + lebron first popped up, I didn't like it myself. I wondered how these two who do virtually the exact same things could coexist, but then it happened and I was as giddy as a schoolgirl. Wade can play off the ball right? Look at the olympics!

But yes the offense is in shambles. Part of it is Arroyo. He actually hit 2 threes last night, but defenses are nowhere near him. They can pack the paint with ease, its not even funny. Eddie House is either amazing or pants shittingly terrible and Chalmers is "not healthy enough" i.e. in the doghouse

Dampier should help more than you realize because of the size factor. Bosh is playing with a traditional center for the first time in years. I admire Z I really do. Guy still plays with heart, but his limitations are on display, he makes up for those with his silky smooth J. He is suited for a backup role, a change of pace big. The 3rd string Center can be Bosh or Magloire (who did more last night than Joel Anthony did all year)

Spoelstra...I didn't like the guy at all last year when he treated Beasley like horse manure in favor of his mancrush Haslem. I hated the offense last year, and now its even worse. I don't know if the players aren't listening to him or if he is just stubborn "I want to simplify the offense. We have such great playmakers I can just put the ball in their hands" Bullshit. He needs to get his head out of his ass or GTFO. He's a robot.

It's fine that you hate us, I'd feel the same if it wasn't us. There are a lot of issues with the team and losing Haslem, the emotional leader won't help matters. The team needs to run a lot more and set better screens.

Also Fuck Joel Anthony with a rusty steak knife. /endrant

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Hellshocked - Darko also has streches of incredibly low IQ turnovers, so as long as he gets it done defensively it really doesn't matter because he probably deserved to not touch the ball on offense.

And 82games points out that Beasley is getting minutes at PF and is doing well, notably since his poor defense trumps Love's atrocious defense, such as when they run Telfair-Johnson-Tolliver-Beasley-Milicic. What's wrong with a jump shooting PF in today's NBA again? Rather take Beas's .506 eFG% over Kevin McBlocksAgainst Love at .459. (P.S. Love is even crappier at finishing <10ft.) With his rebounding improving, especially with love jacking all the rebounds, I think the majority of his minutes should be at the 4. And related, Johnson at the 3.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Particularly by virtue of just having Kobe, hate on the Lakers is like stink on shit.

Blogger Basketbawful said...

Anonymous Aaron said...
I keep hearing people (including Bill Simmons) say the Heat needs to be Lebron's team, not Wade's. WTF does that mean? Wasn't Cleveland Lebron's team and that team can't get it done? Could someone enlighten me?

Blogger Basketbawful said...
What's wrong with a jump shooting PF in today's NBA again?

For further information, see the collected works of Bosh, Chris.

Rather take Beas's .506 eFG% over Kevin McBlocksAgainst Love at .459.

Speaking of blocks against, Beastley has a higher percentage of his close shots (17% to 16%) and inside shots (13% to 12%) blocked than Love. Just sayin'.

(P.S. Love is even crappier at finishing <10ft.)

Also, again just sayin', according to Hoopdata, Love finishes only 47% of his shots inside 10 feet, but Beastly is worse at 43 percent.

Not necessarily trumpeting Love over Beastly here. However, much of Mikey's success over the last couple weeks has been predicated on efficient midrange shooting. And, really, what we have is a six-game sample of really great play against the Kings, Knicks, Hawks, Bobcats and Clippers. He had 25 against the Lakers but shot 9-for-22 and committed 6 TOs. Last night, he went 7-for-20 and had 5 TOs.

Love's biggest strength -- rebounding -- has been proven over the last two seasons and holds up in terms of rebounding percentage. Beastly thus far in his three seasons really has one powerful hot streak that lasted six games and has relied on outside shooting more than anything else.

Beastly's rise has been a great early-season story, but let's wait until opposing defenses start scheming for him before we start crowning him.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
Eh, meant five-game sample above.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Ultra-Misanthrope - Wait, what? The Lakers didn't get any hate after trading for Gasol? Have you been reading Laker blogs/message boards exclusively since then or something?

Also, before really hating on the Lakers for trading for Gasol, keep in mind that Mitch Kupchak initially offered Lamar Odom for Gasol and Chris Wallace rejected the trade. He said he instead wanted Kwame Brown because his contract was expiring at the end of that season, while Odom's wouldn't expire for another year. If you're Mitch Kupchak, how do you not jump all over that?!

Also, I agree with Mr. Bawful that Gasol has definitely been LA's best player this season. There's even been some talk that he's been the league's best player this season and that might be right as well. I know Gasol won't go through the season as the league's best player, and I even have my doubts about whether he'll finish the season as LA's best player (I'm thinking he might begin resting some once Bynum comes back, whenever the hell that is), but thus far Gasol has hands down been the Lakers' MVP, IMO.

Blogger Unknown said...
Countdown to failure is down to 4 after that crazy blowout against the Pacers! Thanks for the support Basketbawful. Orlando is next. Vote now cause the countdown is going to 3 after wednesday! http://www.countdowntofailure.com/MiamiHeat2010/game/15

Anonymous Tree said...
@Ultra-Misanthrope - so, you are that obtuse? @the other chris' comments are pretty accurate in terms of why people hate the Heat. Hell, go to ESPN's NBA page - they have a big "Heat Index" banner at the top of the page for chrissakes! The link to that is larger than links to other, lesser important info (apparently), like standings, stats, player profiles, all the other team pages ... and they got this by achieving nothing. This Heat team has been force fed to basketball fans - makes it easy to dislike them.

And of course, toss in LeBron's idiocy (The Decision, the commercial, his endless asinine comments, claims of racism - conveniently ignoring how people think about whiter-than-white Brett Favre ...). If you're not from Miami, how can you like this team? If they were good at least, maybe people could enjoy watching them. But so far, they've been a catastrophe.

Just last night, for example, LeBron says: "What we're lacking are two things: That is fun and a little bit of swagger right now." Uh ... really? That's what you're lacking? I thought it was little things like wins, cohesion, defined roles and following game plans.

Enlighten us all: why should the average NBA fan outside of Miami cheer for or even like this version of the Heat?

BTW - not trying to be snarky, just seriously wondering why Heat fans can' understand why so many fans despise this team.

Blogger LotharBot said...
Did anyone else read that LeBron quote about two things missing and instantly think "a point guard and a center"?

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
For further information, see the collected works of Bosh, Chris.

And for further information, see the collected works of Dirk Nowitzki...? What does this hyperbole even mean?

Speaking of blocks against, Beastley has a higher percentage of his close shots (17% to 16%) and inside shots (13% to 12%) blocked than Love. Just sayin'.

Too bad 80% of his shots are Jump, so overall Beasley gets blocked 7% while Love gets blocked 11%. Throw in 18.1 FGA/game versus 14.4, and I stand by my sentiment.

Also, again just sayin', according to Hoopdata, Love finishes only 47% of his shots inside 10 feet, but Beastly is worse at 43 percent.

Oops, yea I was reading the AtRim number, which Love is slightly worse, but he's always been notably bad as has Beasley. Sadly, Love attempts so many AtRim shots a game (5.8, 3rd among PFs) and has only converted 51.3% this season.

Anonymous Czernobog said...
@Tree: Forget about it. If he wanted to engage in rational discussion he would've acknowledged one of the many arguments presented to him. He just wanted to call us out on being butthurt and jealous and decided to frame it as a question.

Not even worth responding to, at this point.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Alot of the hate seems directed towards the heat due to the media and their idiocy more than anything else, which I deem as irrational, especially since alot of it borders on personal attacks. Czernobog, you are acting butthurt and jealous and frankly it's insufferable. Grow up and stop using passive-aggressive insults to try to rile me up Czernobog, address me like a man or just shut the fuck up.

Anonymous Tree said...
@Czernobog: try as I might, trolls still manage to hook me with their bait ...

On another note: anyone else curious to see how LeBron would respond to a coach like Riles? This guy has always operated somewhat autonomously from his coaches, and breaks plays all the time ... I doubt Riles would stand for that, and LeBron seems to be proving himself too immature to change how he operates on the court.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Also I never said anything or insinuated that people should love the Heat. So don't try to put words in my mouth, I'm simply curious to what seems to be an overwhelmingly irrational amount of hate, and of course, I draw hate myself. Typical human nature.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Sorry I keep publishing these posts, but they are just prodding the schadenfreude button in my brain today.

Anonymous Czernobog said...
If Riley decides to go back to coaching, which I think is a lot less likely than people are making it out to be, it would certainly be interesting to see what kind of dynamic develops.

I certainly think that the first thing he does is get them to run the ball downcourt a little more.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Tree - BTW - not trying to be snarky, just seriously wondering why Heat fans can't understand why so many fans despise this team.

Most Heat fans this season needed explanation that you put ball in hoop to win this basket game.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Ultra-Misanthrope, just curious, but what was it like living in a cave the entire last year?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Because July was a year ago?

Blogger Dan B. said...
You don't remember the months of LeBron pretending he didn't know where he was going to go, even though he knew all along he was going to Miami? And he didn't tell Cleveland in advance and led them on and therefore prevented them from preparing in any way for his departure? That's all from even before the Decision and the commercial and everything else that's been covered ad naseum here.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I guess maybe I really didn't care that much. I'm not saying Lebron is not a dick. The Decision and all the stupid shit he says (which, news flash, is not something he acquired this year, dude has always said dumb shit) are supreme examples of superdickery, but Cleveland is not my team (sadly, the Warriors are). If it's not your team who the fuck cares? I enjoy watching him play basketball, that's as far as the relationship goes. I expected some hate but the level seems excessive, particularly from people who really don't care about Cleveland one way or the other anyway. There are athletes in all sports that have done actual real terrible things and do not seem to draw nearly the same level of anger. Perhaps I'm naive for thinking people could disassociate themselves from the dickheaded arrogant things athletes say and do and just enjoy watching them play basketball. Well, when they aren't playing the kind of basketball that causes Pat Riley to murder kittens at any rate.

Blogger Wormboy said...
Poetic justice in the Heat relying on Erica Dampier, the man that gave them the title in 2006. Well, along with the officials, that is. Mark Cuban is finally laughing. I take that back. He's STILL having nightmares about signing Dampier to that contract instead of retaining Nashie.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
And for further information, see the collected works of Dirk Nowitzki...? What does this hyperbole even mean?

Is that a serious question? Like...you're asking what hyperbole means on one of the most hyperbolic blogs in the NBA blogosphere? Because you've never used hyperbole yourself?

Okay. Let me make my non-hyperbolic point: I'm not convinced Beastly's legit. He's given us five really strong games against bad teams, and most of his success has come from midrange. He's undersized and I don't believe he can make that work for him at the PF position as a jump shooter. Maybe I'm wrong, but his body and skill set don't make it a very promising possibility.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Ultra-Misanthrope -- I don't like the city of Cleveland, and I've been there several times so I have first-hand experience with how much it sucks. But NO fans deserve to get shit on like that.

And yes, you are naive for thinking we can just enjoy basketball for the sake of basketball. It's being played by people, so naturally we can't make it that simple. If we did, this blog wouldn't exist.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
Sorry I keep publishing these posts, but they are just prodding the schadenfreude button in my brain today.

What are you sorry for? This is Basketbawful. Ever since I started this site, I have made it a point to publish all comments that aren't abusive or just out and out wrong. That should ALWAYS be the case no matter who's publishing the comments.

Anonymous DKH said...
Big Z is pretty much the only thing to like about Miami right now. I can root for him to win because he's a good guy, but I'd prefer to see a better inside presence at power forward next to him, and Bosh doesn't really provide that.

Against that, there's a lot to hate, much of which was explained in The Other Chris's post above, to which Ultra-Misanthrope still hasn't reacted.

As far as LA/Gasol goes, Gasol won't get much wrath because he was traded, in the same way that KG didn't get much wrath. People will direct hate toward Memphis because they gave away Pau Gasol for so little (and last season, it almost looked like the trade was paying off, but this season Memphis has regressed to form; if the trade did pay off, this wouldn't be an issue). Finally, the Lakers did of course get some hate for the trade because they got to stack their team. But if a guy asks to trade you a $100 bill for a $10 bill, and his money doesn't seem counterfeit, it seems tough to fault the Lakers for taking it, as Yams pretty much notes above.

Sure, Miami was only beating bad teams -- but we were told that beating bad teams matters. That, in fact, bitch-slapping crap teams is "the second-most predictive attribute of 'final four' success." In other words, beating the hell out of the Clippers and Timberwolves actually increases a team's chances of making it to the Conference Finals or NBA Finals.

That is not a fair representation of what that article is saying. The statistical mindset contends that any given team has a probability p of winning a championship at the end of the season. Then, p is dependent on the team's relative skill compared to other teams, which we can observe throughout the season when teams play each other.

Then, beating poor teams by a lot doesn't itself increase the chances of success in the playoffs. Rather, "stomps" provide evidence of a quality team that has a good chance of success in the playoffs, compared to teams with a lot of close wins over both good and bad teams.

I'm trying to think of a good example, but I don't know which teams qualify for what off the top of my head.

Blogger Unknown said...
@kazam92, Wade played off the ball well in the Olympics because he had to. The stakes at the Olympics are different than the NBA. If Team USA loses, they are shamed and talked about for years as underachievers, and also, more importantly, risk missing endorsement deals for losing. No player on a Team USA squad ever plays to "get mine," because the team winning trumps player stats.

In the NBA, "getting mine" can lead to endorsements, a better contract, and basically more money (see: Chris Bosh), so guys like Wade, Lebron, and Bosh (and Kobe, Randolph, and Ellis) feel they need to score in order to make money off of their names.

I agree with you that Bosh isn't necessarily the problem, but his style of play might be. The Heat need an inside presense who can draw the defenses down low. Bosh plays on the perimeter and needs space to create his shot.

I just can't understand why they don't go run-and-gun style like the Suns. They're basically an all-perimeter team, why don't they just try it? Instead of using an offensive scheme based on their players' abilities (run-and-gun), they use some slow-down half-court scheme better suited for the Celtics, Lakers, and Magic.

Blogger Dan B. said...
What are you sorry for? This is Basketbawful. Ever since I started this site, I have made it a point to publish all comments that aren't abusive or just out and out wrong. That should ALWAYS be the case no matter who's publishing the comments.

That's the philosophy I've been going by as well when moderating comments. Well, that and I also don't publish spam comments. Look guys, I'm doing you a favor by not letting you purchase a "Rolecks" watch from a comment you saw on a basketball blog. Trust me on this one.

Blogger Solieyu said...
Bawful explained that a couple of times, Sorbo. It's predominately because Wade and James are selective transition players. They prefer to walk to ball up court then create off the dribble, rather than push the ball constantly. Considering Jame's size and passing ability, there's no reason they can't run other teams out of the gym, it seems they just prefer their typical methods.

James is big enough, strong enough, and skilled enough to play a traditional 4. He needs to develop a back-to-the-basket post game if he truly wants to help this team transcend its weaknesses. If he does that then he will open things up for Wade's slashes, Bosh when he's doubled, and all their perimeter players.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Well some of these comments are pretty crappy, and could have cleaned up the thread.

Anyways, here's this artile via Woj interviewing Kobe, which is just as bad and simultaneously amazing as it sounds.

On his mentor (spoiler: MICHAEL JACKSON):

"Bryant was the 18-year-old wonder for the Los Angeles Lakers, and no one knew what to make of a restlessness borne of a desperate desire for greatness.

“He noticed I was getting a lot of [expletive] for being different,” Bryant said.

They would talk for hours and hours, visiting at Neverland Ranch, and Bryant has long been fortified by the lessons Jackson instilled about the burden of honoring true talent, about the ways to open your mind to be smarter, sharper and insatiable in the chase.
“That’s the mentality that I have – it’s not an athletic one. It’s not from [Michael] Jordan. It’s not from other athletes.

“It’s from Michael Jackson.”

Yes, a young boy Kobe visited Neverland Ranch often, and got his mentality from Michael Jackson. You can't make this shit up.

On game night preparation:

"On the night before every game, he still downloads video into his iPhone from Mike Procopio in Chicago about how opponents may attack him, the way the defenders will rotate to him, the spots where he can feed his teammates the ball – small things beyond the Lakers’ own scouting reports, another edge. Sometimes, they’ll email thoughts back and forth past midnight, which isn’t such a big deal because Bryant seldom sleeps more than three hours a night."

KOBE NO SLEEP MUST FOCUS. Kobe, on winning championships:

"You’ve got to change the culture of your team – that’s how you truly make guys better. In a way, you have to help them to get the same DNA that you have, the same focus you have, maybe even close to the same drive. That’s how you make guys better."

On the Heat:

"As he walked the District’s streets in August, people peppered him with three words: Beat the Heat.

Beat the Heat?

“That’s what I get a lot now,” Bryant said. ‘Beat the Heat.’ ”

Kobe Bryant heard the edict from fans this summer: Beat the Heat.

Truth be told, it hadn’t occurred to him that would be the mantra for the two-time defending champion Lakers.

“Um, they’re in the East,” Bryant would say.

Kobe, on Olympics 2012:

"Actually, I really don’t give a [expletive]. I’m not curious about it. Give me my [expletive] gold medal and then let me try to win another NBA championship. Let’s practice, have a good time, and if you need me in the last two minutes of the game, I’ll be coming in to pull the [expletive] out."

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
Sadly, the Heat aren't enjoyable to watch right now. They certainly weren't last night. They looked kinda sad and futile. Jacking up threes, back to back charges by Bosh and LeBron in the 4th, bad bad defense.. No passion, no fight, no nothing. Entertaining teams have real cohesion on the court. The Heat do not, and are not enjoyable to watch right now, by any stretch. At least not from what I saw, or most of the game against my beloved Craptors. (During which the commentators openly mocked Chris Bosh for sulking on the bench. To paraphrase Jack Armstrong: It's a team game, so stop being a fucking baby and support the team you play on, jackass)

Blogger Wild Yams said...
I actually never delete comments unless they're blatantly spam. I even publish ones which are clearly trolling. Should I be exercising more discretion? I figure as long as it's a real person looking to contribute something, even something ugly, I shouldn't censor them. Of course, being a Laker fan, if I began deleting all the comments around here that upset me, this place would be pretty devoid of comments :rimshot:

Regarding Beasley, he did put up 25 & 10 against the Lakers the other day with Artest guarding him for a lot of the game. Mr. Bawful, you really don't think Beasley is viable as a SF the way the Wolves are playing him right now? I think while he's young he could play that position, but then due to his size he could maybe slide over to PF when he's older and less agile (or if he packs on some more weight), kinda the way Lamar Odom did. His effectiveness as an offensive player right now is definitely based on a pretty small sample size, but on that Wolves team he's probably gonna be their go-to guy for the scoring load for a while it looks like. The dude's putting up over 22 ppg for the season, which ain't bad. I don't think he's a legit superstar or anything, but I think he's far better than the Heat thought he was.

Anonymous JJ said...
Biggest problem with Heat is that their "big three" haven't figured it out yet (or maybe never?). Nothing will happen - even if they trade/sign to fill in the gaps - until those three figure out their pecking order. OK, make that just Wade and LeBron figuring out their pecking order. Bosh is just grateful to be eating off their feet.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
As a suffering Toronto fan I can say this after watching Bosh play for the better part of a decade, he cant block shots, that’s nothing new, Bargnani gets more blocks than him, considering Bargs never leaves his feet that’s kind of sad, also I noticed he has lost all of the bulk he put on last summer, until he got injured last season, the guy was a beast, he drove way more because he could handle more abuse in the post with his extra muscle. That being said, most Toronto fans were not that heartbroken when he left, I personally thought it was madness that Collangelo was going to offer him max, considering he already has one bad knee, I mean we have been losing for years with bosh, why blow more of capspace to lose more with bosh :p

Anonymous Czernobog said...
@ Dan B: Do you get any entertaining spam comments? It might be a good idea to collate some of the funnier/weirder/dumber ones and save them up for a summertime post.

Blogger Dan B. said...
@ Dan B: Do you get any entertaining spam comments? It might be a good idea to collate some of the funnier/weirder/dumber ones and save them up for a summertime post.

Sadly, no. If they were actually entertaining, I would tell you guys about it immediately. They're just lame strings of random text and the kind of boring stuff you see in Yahoo comments and whatnot.

Blogger Unknown said...
I would be careful before counting the Warriors out just yet. Yes they are back to .500, but that is after losing 5 of their last 6 without their star power forward David Lee. Not only that, they are also missing their backup, third string and fourth string power forwards. I challenge you to find one NBA team past or present who can win games with Vladimir Badmonovich as their starting power forward. Once Lee and Amundson come back this team will be entirely different.

Blogger Cortez said...
"I have made it a point to publish all comments that aren't abusive or just out and out wrong."

And yet my comments continue to be allowed?!?!? Amazing.

As for Beasley...

The film "The Hustler" summed this guy up in '61 (starring M. Beasley as Fast Eddie).

Bert Gordon: Eddie, is it alright if I get personal?
Fast Eddie: Whaddaya been so far?
Bert Gordon: Eddie, you're a born loser.
Fast Eddie: What's that supposed to mean?
Bert Gordon: First time in ten years I ever saw Minnesota Fats hooked... really hooked. But you let him off.
Fast Eddie: I told you I got drunk.
Bert Gordon: Sure you got drunk. You have the best excuse in the world for losing; no trouble losing when you got a good excuse. Winning... that can be heavy on your back, too, like a monkey. You'll drop that load too when you got an excuse. All you gotta do is learn to feel sorry for yourself. One of the best indoor sports, feeling sorry for yourself. A sport enjoyed by all, especially the born losers.
Fast Eddie: Thanks for the drink.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
I think I've rejected 2 comments total, just to stop a flame war with an annoying wall of text swearing.

Also my personal favorite theory on Beasley playing great in Minnesota is because no one will bother him for lighting up anymore, and he won't be distracted by salacious scantily-clad Latino women anymore. And the whole system that makes better use of him and all that, blah blah blah.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Cortez - Maybe all Beasley needs is for his woman to kill herself in his hotel room to give him the requisite character he needs to be a winner. It worked (?) for Fast Eddie Felson. Or maybe he just needs a few weeks on the road with a whiny young Tom Cruise type.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
Did everyone already forget?

The reason we hate the Miami Heat is because we're all racist. Duh.


PS- want to buy a rolecks or some vi8gara? :D

Anonymous Hellshocked said...

Darko also has streches of incredibly low IQ turnovers, so as long as he gets it done defensively it really doesn't matter because he probably deserved to not touch the ball on offense

I'm not sure what this means. If you're saying Darko SHOULD get rewarded on offense for playing good defense, that's a dangerous game to play. Despite his strong play over the last, um, 3 games he has been ridiculously inefficient this season. His moves are decent but his touch is questionable. There's not much point in him stopping the other team from scoring if he also stops his own team from scoring. If you're saying Darko SHOULDN'T touch the ball on offense, well, yeah. He shouldn't get very many touches unless he's drawing fouls but that's exactly what I was saying: when he doesn't get touches he stops rebounding, blocking shots or even contesting jumpers and sort of plods along aimlessly from baseline to baseline. That has been his MO every year he's gotten minutes and, while I hope it changes, I don't see it happening.

What's wrong with a jump shooting PF in today's NBA again?

Nothing wrong with a jump shooting center in and of itself. What's wrong with a 6'7 power forward who does absolutely nothing but take jumpers? Who won't pass, rebound, block shots or draw fouls? Who tends to score big but not particularly efficiently? Who happens to have flamed out on a winning team but is now putting up some decent offensive numbers on a terrible one? Come on. I hope he becomes an elite player but I really don't see it happening and I certainly don't see it happening down low.

Everyone knows Kevin Love is a terrible finisher inside and perhaps the worst defensive 4 in the league, but he is a team player, a world class rebounder, a good (not quite great) passer, draws more fouls than Beasley and will eventually learn his limitations and to take better shots and hit them at a 45-48% or so clip. Are you really banking on Beasley becoming a better rebounder, passer and teammate over Love becoming a better shooter? I'm not. Beasley's ideal role on a winning team would be as a 6th man.


I'm not one of those people who thinks Lebron at the 4 would solve Miami's problems. It's not just his complete lack of a post game, since Miami's interior problems have a lot more to do with defense than offense, it's the fact that it's a much different playing style than he is used to and prefers. Contact from baseline to baseline, boxing out every player in sight whenever a shot goes up, needing someone else to facilitate you the ball instead of initiating the offense yourself, post defense, protecting the basket, administering hard fouls. These aren't things that can be picked up overnight by the inexperienced nor are they things Lebron has shown much interest in during his career thus far. He's an incredible 3. It's easier to get players who complement him than to turn him into something very different.

@Wild Yams:

I think the Heat knew he could do what he's doing, but they got sick of the fact his rebounding was lazy, he had no interest on defense, had trouble with plays and didn't really contribute much to team success. For better or worse, Miami tends to prefer players who can work within their system and Beasley wasn't cutting it. As crappy as the Bosh has been at times this season, he is a much better fit for the team than Beasley. Their interior defense is a joke, but imagine how much worse it would be with a 6'7 dude who averages as many rebounds as Ilgauskas in twice the minutes.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Is it too early to call LeBron a cancer yet?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Funny watching Paul trying and get the ref to call a tech on Griffin for swearing in that clip. Blake probably just realized he plays for the Clippers.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Funny watching Paul trying and get the ref to call a tech on Griffin for swearing in that clip. Blake probably just realized he plays for the Clippers.

*trying to* not 'trying and'. My bad,

Anonymous Anonymous said...
"The game was in Atlanta, by the way."

damn! i love your sarcasm.....