Surprise!!
Good evening, and welcome to Monday Night BAD. So yeah, there's not much I can say that will hold your attention after such a fantastic opening picture, so let's get to the important stuff...

According to this link (via JE Skeets), Jamario Moon is a little girlie man:

There was some humor in the locker room after the game about Jamario Moon's skin cream. It was a very aromatic strawberry, filling the whole room, and it had several guys making jokes at Moon's expense. Said one person who shall remain nameless: "It smells like a girls locker room in here."

Worst of the Weekend in Pictures:

Kobe! Do you really want to go through another lawsuit??

Roy Hibbert cannot believe The Big Icy Hot Patch Mummy just dunked on his ass

Mike Miller and Jared Jeffries will be disappointed when they learn Hole in the Wall has been cancelled

Hey, Scott Brooks, how big is Greg Oden's member?

It's hard not to share a good facepalm photo

Another Nyets loss = Sad Brook Lopez and Sad Yi Jianlian

Ball.
Nationally Televised Games:
Suns at Hornets: Chris Paul, you will be dearly missed for the next month or two. And of course, I won't get to see this game because NBA TV games are blacked out from NBA League Pass Broadband, but since the Suns are on the road, it probably is for the best...

All The Other Games:
Celtics at Wizards Generals Bullets: There's no way the Celtics can lose this one, right? Right? Yeah... Excuse me while I go check to see if my toaster's power plug is long enough to reach the bathtub...

Bucks at Heat: These two teams just played on Saturday, and the Heat lost, surprisingly pretty much nobody considering their randomness this year. Now, my question considering his 6-20 shooting performance Saturday: if D-Wade sits out this game with a sore back, does that make his team more or less likely to win?

Lakers at Grizzlies: After discussing scheduling with Wild Yams this weekend, I will say this much: I'm sure the NBA didn't intend on this being a bad draw on a back-to-back, but yes, it is. This is not a team you want to play on the road after a 1 point win over the Celtics just one day ago.

Kings at Nuggets: Poor, poor Sacramento. I really don't want them to get savagely destroyed again, but... the Purple Paupers, everybody! You don't need to be Lego Stephen Hawking to know they suck.

Mavericks at Jazz: This game is definately appointment viewing for me. Both teams are playing well right now. You know, side from Dallas letting Andre freaking Miller drop 52 on them this weekend. Other than that, they've looked great.

Bobcats at Frail Blazers: Speaking of whom... If I could put money on Andre Miller not scoring 50+ again in this game, I would take out a loan just to cover the value of the bet, assuming the odds were good. (Wait, you mean to tell me I'd have to bet $8000 to make $1 on that? Well, damn. So much for being able to retire before I turn 26 next month.)

Labels: BALL, Bawful After Dark, Jamario Moon, New Jersey Nets