What beast have the Magic unleashed?

The Orlando Magic: Yeah, they didn't even play last Thursday, but they are still finding ways to wreak havoc on the league through how bad they are. The Brooklyn Knight had been crumpled in a ditch for days, then the Magic played the Nets twice in a row, and they restored him with their sorcery of sucking. Usually, the mad magicians only use their "make a rival team better" spell on the Lakers.

The Boston Celtics: Jason Terry was feeling a little better, 10 points and 6 assists, so we can assume he did get that thoughtful fruit basket the Utah Jazz were planning to send him. However, it was not enough to overcome the loss of Rondo (ankle) and knock a newly empowered Knight from its galloping steed.

Zombie alert: The reanimated corpse of Jerry Stackhouse was spotted again in the borough of Brooklyn. He evidently disrupted a Nets game for over 20 minutes, shooting the basketball several times in the process, before he was scared away by the terrible sound of Avery Johnson's voice.  

Where the hell am I gonna do my Christmas shopping?

Josh Childress: You can read about the game he had in the lacktion section; this entry is to announce the sad news that Josh "Geoffrey" Childress was let go from his job with Toys "R" Us. The firing was relayed to Josh with a phone call that awoke him from a deep sleep around 3am, Friday morning. Apparently, the board of directors had become aware that Childress plays basketball professionally. They met together to view the game at a local gentleman's club and were not pleased with what they saw—at least not from Josh. 

The Spurs: The aged Texans missed their chance to stop the mighty, indestructible juggernaut that was is the New York Knicks. As I write this, on Monday the 19th, I can think of no reason to suggest ominously that this might be the end of the line for the Knicks' winning streak... 

The Nuggets: The Nuggets lost despite Dwyane Wade, something or other, sitting out. 

Ty Lawson: He may have missed all seven of his shots, but Ty did show what a good teammate he is by helping Faried notch 11 offensive rebounds.  

Lacktion:

Nets-Celtics: Josh "Geoffrey" Childress looked lost, nibbling at the tall trees and recording no statistics for a long-necked 8 trillion.  Jared Sullinger lingered on the court long enough for a +3 suck differential.

James Bond will return in From a View to the Worst of the Weekend.