Basketbawful

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Human Victory Cigar (hyoo'-muhn vik'-tuh-ree si'-gahr) noun. The 12th man on a basketball team, usually exiled to the end of the bench until the team is involved in a major blowout and there are only a few minutes left in the game.

Usage example: If your team is up by 40 with two mintues to go, the Human Victory Cigar will probably enter the game. Probably. Well, maybe.

Word Trivia: The NBA has been blessed with a numerous and varied array of Human Victory Cigars over the years: Greg Kite, Uwe Blab, Mike Smrek, Scott Hastings, Joe Kleine, Ed Nealy, Jack Haley...and many, many, many more. But Darko Milicic is today's preeminent HVC, and a living symbol that if you can't learn to do something well, you should probably learn to enjoy watching other people do it instead. Darko was (infamously) selected by the Pistons in the first round of the 2003 NBA Draft ahead of other All-Star caliber players such as Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh, and Dwayne Wade, making him the worst second overall draft pick since Sam Bowie.

Unless the Pistons are up 30, thewarmups never even come off.

6 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Ease up on Darko now. Kid looks real good now that he's playing 20-25 minutes per game in Orlando. He's going to be a very good player next year. Detroit was nuts not to give him a little burn and let him develop.

4/21/2006 12:36 AM

Anonymous said...

WOW GOOD CALL ON DARKO BEAING A VERY GOOD PLAYER........

1/15/2009 3:35 PM

Anonymous said...

Um, Sam Bowie went 1st to Portland. Michael Jordan went 2nd to Chicago, making him the GREATEST 2nd pick in history. Get your facts straight Mr. Basketball Blogger.

6/26/2009 2:39 PM

Basketbawful said...

Anonymous -- Follow this link and you'll discover that Hakeem Olajuwon was chosen number one overall by Houston, Bowie second by Portland and Jordan third by Chicago. Seriously, do some research before you embarrass yourself by trying to embarrass me. Unless you just like coming off as both sarcastic AND stupid. Sarcastic I can live with. Stupid, not so much.

6/26/2009 3:30 PM

Anonymous said...

Hahah that guys an idiot. Obviously Hakeem the Dream was 1st overall.

6/30/2009 4:03 PM

Anonymous said...

ahahahha did that moron say Jordan went 2nd? bwahahah how old is this guy 13 or something?

11/05/2009 10:53 AM