Well, Blake Griffin has nothin to do, Steve Nash has nothin to do, and now Tyson Chandler, Shawn Marion, and Kevin Love now have too much time on their hands. The funnyordie people, even the women, must have constant erections to have this much acting talent at their disposal.

One admittedly amusing line: "You guys got weak-ass fingers."



If I really wanted to see an out-of-place actor, I'd just pick up the latest Blu-ray edition of Star Wars. My God, when is Goerge Lucas going to stop tinkering?



Or when basketball entertainment gets really sparse, we'll have to get super-creative with our alternatives, courtesy of Taiwan. Thanks, AnacondaHL:

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16 Comments:
Blogger AnacondaHL said...
If you guys haven't been following the lockout news, or even if you have, you need to click on this youtube right now to get the greatest summary of the NBA lockout events, brought to you by Taiwan's Apple Daily News.

Anonymous Strego said...
Taiwanese video, 00:51 ...OH MY GOSH! IT'S EVIL TED!

Blogger Dan B. said...
Evil Ted -- That was way better than I expected. Started a little slow but picked up speed quickly. I lost it when Kevin Love patted Tyson Chandler on the back.

AnacondaHL -- I love everything about that video.

Strego -- Wow. Strange things afoot...

Blogger Evil Ted said...
Oh my God. Did I marry and have sex with David Stern? I am truly disturbed.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Evil Ted -- If so, that means you have inside connections. You can end this lockout for us! Is sleeping with David Stern that big of a sacrifice?

Wait, yes, yes it is. Sorry I said anything.

Blogger Evil Ted said...
I will NOT ride mini-Stern - no matter what the stakes.

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
This has absolutely nothing to do with the blog post but rather a question maybe Evil Ted can help with.

Robert Parish was on the 97 Bulls, what if any were his contributions? I was only 10 years old at the time and not following Chicago.

Blogger Evil Ted said...
KHayes - Well, after Boston, Parish did spend 1995 (age 42) and 1996 (age 43) with the Charlotte Hornets. He was averaging 4.8 and 3.9 points in those years, respectively - veritable Greg Ostertag. By the time he went to Chicago, he was 44 and a shell of his former self, down to 3.7 pts and a couple of rebounds a game.

Those are stats you can look up (as I did), but as for my perspective, his contributions were what you would expect from a 44-year-old, and the only thing that could possibly excite any team about acquiring him at that time was name recognition (much like Shaq turned out to be for the Celtics this past year).

Perhaps the greatest tragedy was that Parish could have, and should have, retired a Celtic. Instead, he hung onto his career too long. This did not so much tarnish his personal legacy (he will always be one of the greatest centers of all time)...but it did no favors to the Celtics who, despite having the first Black head coach (Bill Russell), and the first all-black starting lineup (in 1964), were still seen as a racist organization (whereas, it was actually the city itself that was racist). So, having the only black member of the Big Three not retire as a Celtic was a shame, but Parish did himself no favors by hanging on far too long.

The counter-argument to that (being that the celts actually WERE racist) might be that they would have kept McHale and Bird until they were each in their 50's and in wheelchairs...not impossible to imagine.

ET

Blogger TeamD said...
After watching the Stern interview on NBA, something strike my mind.

About the cap and the over the cap tax. Bigger markets have advantages over small market teams, small teams complain they cannot fight a 110mil $ team that the lakers, boston etc have, of course including the dfd tax.

Why not distributing all the dollar for dollar tax to lesser teams that do not even reach the cap limit, so they will have more money to spend on players, making the league pay less to players and being careful when giving big contracts to players, because one bad investment means presumably making your competition better...

They could start from here, of course you will have insecurity over years, but they can make it so they know 2-3-4 years in advance, how much money they will get from tax paying teams in the future.

Just a thought, i wish someone important could read this, maybe it will help.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
TeamD - Uh, that's exactly what the luxury tax does. You have no idea what you're talking about.

Blogger TeamD said...
Thank you God for enlightening us...i bet you feel nice knowing it all ?!

It made sense to me, i thought the luxury tax goes to the NBA to cover costs or something. That is really reasonable.

Fight between the rich...that's all this world will come to.

Anonymous allison said...
Oh my God it *is* Evil Ted!!! I busted a kidney laughing

Blogger Michael Hsu said...
If the lockout happens Boston is so screwed. I'm surprised that Bawful hasn't written anything about this. Ray Allen and KG are both on the last year of their contracts. No one is going to trade for them and/or Boston can't trade them since there is no off season.

The only way is if Boston resigns them for whenever the next season happens, but they will be older and with a year off it's much harder to shake the rust at their age.

Anyone else happy that lockout happens in Lebron's prime?

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
Thank you Evil Ted.

The book "The Selling of the Green" written by 2 bitter pissed off Knick fans called the Celtics every name in the book. Claiming the owners were racist, the fans were racist, Red was racist and even the peanut vendors were racist. So when Robert Parish walked after the 94 season I'm sure Boston's reputation went even further into the toilet.

That's also probably why Ainge makes the trades that he does. He has no loyalty to "Celtics tradition" that hung on to people for far too long (Bird, McHale, Ramsey, Heinsohn, etc) because he himself was traded and didn't get to finish his career here. That's why I'm afraid in a few years he'll dump Pierce for a second rounder or something.

Blogger Mr. Too Nice Guy said...
TeamD - I thought about responding to your comment with a good measure of snark, oozing sarcasm, and complete condescension, but then I realized I'm not an insufferable know-it-all.

Concerning the current nature of the lockout, Stern is absolutely killing the players in the PR battle. He gets to the press talking about how much his ownership group has given up (regardless of the veracity of his claim) and every few days he gets to go all doom and gloom about all the games they are having to cancel on a weekly basis.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
The Internet taught me that being an insufferable know-it-all is the correct response to someone who "wishes someone important would read what they are saying". In most other situations I would have simply posted a link to Larry Coon's FAQs and moved on.