As some of you may already know, Basketbawful and I were sent by our Clark Kent job employers to the graffiti-strewn yet charming hamlet of Pisa, Italy for two weeks of grueling labor, peppered with brief glimpses of sweet, almost vacation-like freedom.

Bawful and I pride ourselves on being able to identify an opportunity, especially when said opportunity smashes us in the face with a shovel. This trip was, quite clearly, a rare chance to bring our special brand of mediocre entertainment to you on a global scale.

Here, we bring you Part One of our video, in which we conduct a not-very-exhaustive-at-all search for the sport of basketball in Pisa. Enjoy.

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43 Comments:
Blogger eileen said...
I think the British woman said "I wanted a danish" and I was going to make a joke about her referring to Big Mat, but then I remembered that he's Dutch not Danish. Oh well.
Nice video, btw. It almost makes up for the delay in Livin' Large.

Anonymous Pete Elliott said...
I see that your skills at talking to women have greatly increased since your freshman year of college.

Anonymous pHLo said...
haha nice video

some years ago i've been there too
and for real, EVERYBODY holds up the tower or is leaning against it for a picture

the ostertag line was hilarious

Blogger the differential said...
omg hahaha this was funny. as soon as you said the wall was large, had lots of holes, and almost no chance of stopping anybody, I knew the next thing out of your mouth would be the obligatory "Kind of like [insert useless big man (appropriately, you used Zach Randolph)]'s defense."

I'm guessing that you told her to mention Greg Ostertag. if she actually knew who he was, and that he sucked... I think I might cry.

She seriously didn't know who Larry Bird was? Oh well, at least she also didn't know who Kobe is... there is SOME justice in this world.

Great video, and I don't even mind that you haven't posted another Livin Large yet.

Molto buono

mitchsmith91

Blogger Evil Ted said...
Diff,

If it heightens the enjoyment for you to think she knew who Greg Ostertag is, then she absolutely did.

ET

Blogger Platinum said...
First time commenter (maybe?), but long time reader. Great vid, I hope you got some pickup footage if you ever found a court. Loved the comment about the chick's tats like an NBA player...

CAPTCHA: ateniz - n - this is what i believe the british lady said.

"fuck 'em both" (Mat)

Blogger Victor said...
Holy crap Bawful has the most generic, whitest-sounding voice I've ever heard.

And I think you look 10x better without the shades. Probably because your eyes are probably your best feature. I have no idea where that came from, but I thought I'd share it.

Blogger Nick Flynt said...
"Laadiees? No, I'm not interested in a quickie, I'd like to know if you've heard of Larry Bird...No? I'm outta here."

I'm just glad Zach Ranolph (and I do mean Ranolph) isn't with the fabulous LA Clippers any longer. I also didn't know Evil Ted was bald along with Bawful. The Bald Brotherhood.

Anonymous mauweezie said...
This made my day, freakin hilarious! Longe time reader, 2nd time post.

Blogger Nick Flynt said...
I just saw a word of the day I have never seen before: Trick. Never before have I seen it. What a special day it must be.

Anonymous Geert said...
I can totally relate to them only knowing Michael Jordan. Here, most people would only be able to name him, even if I hit 'em with a stick. A small portion will also name Shaq and Rik Smits but that's usually it :(.

Anonymous thelakersfan said...
oh my.. that was entertaining.. i don't mind seeing this in place of the livin' large series.. you can do a show, a book, and a blog! the stars are aligning for you, capitalize on it like how the lakers capitlized on pau & artest deals :D

captcha: loses
the celtics in 2010 finals.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
That was a really good video! Kinda makes up for the lack of Livin' Large.

I really thought that woman wasn't going to stop talking about Michael Jackson!

Blogger Unknown said...
Holy crap!!! Did you pay her to say that??? If so, I don't care because it's still the most awesome thing you've ever posted.

Blogger BJ said...
(snork!) Priceless, guys, priceless.

I also got EvilTed's How-To video as a related. Does his voice always go falsetto when he's being a dick?
-BJ

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I'd like to point out a few things to the readers. Firstly, note Bawful's mangled, twisted hands. *shudder*

Secondly, at the beginning of Evil Ted putting the moves, ahem, showing his 40-year-old virginity by asking about Bird, you can hear Bawful putting his best pickup lines out. By referencing Jean Claude Van Damme!

Facepalm.

Blogger Miss L said...
You guys are awesome. Great video!

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
HE REALLY LOVED CHILDREN.

Best tribute to Michael Jackson ever.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Mr. Bawful - It should be pointed out that Dennis Rodman starred with Jean-Claude Van Damme (and Mickey Rourke) in Double Team, not Double Impact. Just something to keep in mind for the next time you use a little Van Dammage to sweeten your pickup game :)

Blogger 49er16 said...
Doesn't know Larry Bird? That's criminal!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
The Conseco line cut me deep. I was there in February and could hear my voice echo. During the game.

Anonymous ak dave said...
I love how the brunette got ALL EXCITED and wanted to say something to the camera (which she presumed would somehow get a message to Michael in the afterlife) when ET mentioned Michael Jackson. Between that and the PDA, you really got a great look at Italian culture!

Oh, and do you usually let random old ladies stick their fingers in your food? :D

Thanks guys- this was really cool

P.S.- please tell me you

Anonymous Anonymous said...
bawful, can you tell me which shades are those, the name of the model or something, i really like them?

Anonymous the REAL Headless Chicken said...
Wow, this was hilarious. The waitress friend making the statement of the year. And I am European. And I know Greg Ostertag and I can only second that: HE SUCKS!

Blogger Unknown said...
You are lucky you never found the basketball court. I recently moved to switzerland, and found my first pickup game the other day. They didn't check up! No checks, you could just inbound the ball as soon as you got it. And if you did start at the top of the key (like after a foul), you could dribble in. Fuckin' animals.

Anonymous carlodj said...
haha. fun stuff.

I thought the brunette was a hottie. Would you rank her higher than Aimee? Lower than Shelly? Cindy? anybody from LL?

Anonymous Bored as Eff said...
Wow I would like Ch. 18 right now instead of a video which proves unlistenable at work.

Blogger Unknown said...
New Foreign Bball player goes to Syracuse, could he be the next Mat?

Fab Melo from Brazil

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/basketball/blog/the_dagger/post/College-hoops-new-most-fantastic-name-Fab-Melo?urn=ncaab,180962

Blogger Dan B. said...
Yeah, it was totally worth the wait to get off work, go get a flat tire patched, and drive home before I could watch this video. Great stuff indeed. So, when does BasketbawfulTV plan on showing up on my digital cable package?

Blogger Evil Ted said...
As soon as we can make a living doing it. I figure we just need a donation of $1200 bucks a year per fan.

Bawful wanted me to let you know that he's takin a little break, but Livin' Large will be back soon.

In the meantime, I'll get further installments of our Italy trip online.

ET

Anonymous Anonymous said...
check out ron artests MJ tribute:
http://www.thedailyswarm.com/swarm/michael-michael-michael-you-my-nigga-listen-ron-artests-horrific-michael-jackson-tribute-song/

Blogger Basketbawful said...
BadDave and Wild Yams -- Look, you couldn't see it because Evil Ted was obsessed with the brunette's rack, but the other girl slipped me her room key about two seconds after I mentioned Mr. Van Damme. And they were wrapped in her panties. True story.

Regarding my sunglasses: I busted up my Oakley's right before the Italy trip, so those are a pair of cheapies from Walgreens.

AK Dave -- I don't normally let people stick their grubbies into my food, but that dessert was so lousy I figured it couldn't hurt.

Victor -- You dis my voice and compiment my eyes...I don't know how to feel. Remember, though, that the camera adds 10 pounds to a voice.

By the way, I swear, Livin' Large will return soon. I'm just freakin' beat and recharging my Bawful Batteries.

Anonymous Wormboy said...
NO! The Ostertag line was set up!

Freakin hilarious.

Blogger KMITB said...
Come on now....the "baby, baby hook" was Game 4 of the '87 Finals...not '85! You just went down a couple notches on the "I Know Everything about Larry Bird Fan Club"!

Anonymous Extremely Smart Person said...
Those girls were freaking stupid... I could barely watch, they were shining with stupidity... This is what you call "antihotism"

Blogger T-Mill said...
Like Zach Randolph's defense...

Perfect coming from a fellow Wildkat since he went to Marion.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Oh dear, you ran into a Brit chav at the end. My condolences.

Blogger LaShawn said...
Italian reader here. You made your search fot basketball in the wrong city, Pisa has no basktball tradition, totally no basketball fans there. You should have made your quest in some other cities, you'd have had more luck!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Amazing how goodlooking you were as kids...and now...

Blogger Fishy said...
I happen to be in Germany right now - no courts here either as far as I can tell... how the hell did Dirk become such a good shooter??

Awesomely entertaining video

Blogger anf said...
Nice ending!!! LOL

Anonymous Anonymous said...
http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=43.725278,10.4&spn=0.3,0.3&t=m&q=43.725278,10.4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Db_QQoKS6R8

And here's the court, so "stupid American" for not finding it.