Orlando Magic forward/thug
Keyon Dooling clocked
Ray Allen last night, spicing up what would have been an otherwise humdrum
113-104 win for the
Seattle Supersonics. Of course, Allen precipitated the decking by intentionally elbowing Dooling in the chest, then countered it with a full-body tackle and three loving punches to Dooling's face. Hilarity ensued.
Of course,
this Seattle newspaper would have you believe the fight started because Keyon was anally raping Ray in full view of thousands of spectators, and
that's why Ray reacted. Believe whatever you want. Fights happen, yada, yada, yada. What made this scuffle more fun than usual was the fact that Dooling tried to chase Allen down in the locker room, with live cameras following him
WWE-style. I'm sure you'll agree with me when I say that was totally sweet.
Between this incident and
Kobe (who's taken to calling himself "
The Mamba") laying out
Mike Miller with
a forearm shiver, is there any doubt left that
Vince McMahon is scripting the 2005-06
NBA season?
Dress codes,
trade demands, sinister-yet-laughable nicknames, poorly choreographed fights, locker room tunnel chases, grown men
wearing tights...I'm telling you, I haven't had this much fun since
WrestleMania 3.
Fightastic Extra: Since
David Stern and his Anti-Fun Police have seized any cool pictures of the fight, here's an artist's rendition starring
The Incredible Hulk and
Superman.
"Keyon will smash Ray Allen to pieces...then eat pieces!!"