Anyone who follows professional basketball probably remembers how Vince Carter screwed over the Toronto Raptors, but in case you need a reminder, here's a brief synopsis. Vince:

  • Signed a $90 million contract extension after the 2000-01 season.

  • Proceeded to miss 70 games over the following three seasons, during which time his scoring, rebounding, and assist averages dropped like Pamela Anderson's bust line.

  • Demanded a trade prior to the 2005-05 season (with a full three years remaining on his contract extension), stating "it's just time for me to look after me."

  • Proceeded to "play" 20 games for the Raptors under protest, averaging a career-worst 15.9 points on 40 percent shooting to go along with 3 rebounds.

  • Signed deal with Satan to force a trade to the New Jersy Nets. Thanks to diminished trade value resulting from his sinking numbers, the Raptors receive total crap in return: Alonzo Mourning (who refused to play in Toronto), Aaron Williams (who might as well not be playing), half a pack of Juicy Fruit gum, and one sheet of Care Bear stickers.

  • Orchestrated an amazing "comeback" from mediocrity, averaging 27.5 points, 6 rebounds, and 5 assists for the Nets.
So last night, Carter got his "sweet revenge" on the city that loved him and paid him almost $20 million a year to play a game for a living. The man who is rightly remembered by most Canucks as "Half Man, Half A Season" hit a 3-pointer at the buzzer, heroically lifting the Nets to a 105-104 victory over the mighty (11-23) Raptors. Afterward, Carter described it as "the best shot of my career." And, considering that the Ringless Wonder hasn't ever actually won an important game, he's probably right.

But none of that is important. The real news of the game was how Morris Peterson bitchslapped Vince during the game. Sure, he got ejected, and the Raptors probably lost the game because of it (Vince ripped off 13 straight points at the end without Peterson there to defend him), but that's a small price to pay for a little retribution mixed with the love of the entire continent of Canada. That, my friends, is worth more than all the stink in New Jersey.

Canada
Canada is now in love with Morris Peterson.
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