Up until the last few days, the 2005-06 NBA
season had been a career year
for human beanbag Danny Fortson
. The highlights include:1.
An arthritic toe
that slowed him down and made him fat.2.
Hurt feelings due to criticism from an unnamed teammate
Responding to said teammate by calling him a girl
against Jerry Colangelo
and journalist Peter Vecsey for "ruining" his life."5.
Over 4 points and 3 rebounds a game
Unfortunately for Danny, the good times came to an end when he called NBA Vice-President of Operations Stu Jackson
a "gangster" for just doing his job
: fining and suspending the Sonics
forward for his typical thuggish behavior
Fortson's punishment was pretty pedestrian for a guy who got tossed from a game (double Ts for almost decapitating someone with a flying elbow, then complaining about the call, then complaining some more), charged the ref who ejected him, had to be restrained by teammates, and then made an "obscene gesture" as he was leaving the court. He got jacked up for about 200K, most of which was lost salary. True to his nature as a savage barbarian, Fortson wasted no time attacking Jackson in the press:
"What Stu Jackson just did is criminal as far as I'm concerned, like a gangster, like somebody strong-arming somebody, taking their money. It's criminal. He needs to know that. It's criminal fines in the work force."
I guess it's hard for the average, middle-class working stiff like myself to understand what Danny's going through. I'm pretty sure I'd get worse than a fine if I almost wacked a co-worker in the face, threatened our human resources director for saying anything about it, then flipped off my boss. I don't know. But here's a suggestion Danny: stop thugging people and mouthing off about it. If you do your best David Robinson
impression for a full month or two and they keep suspending you, then fine, you're being harrassed. But until the blood dripping down your elbows has time to dry, you'll excuse my skepticism."I say we put out a hit on this 'Fortson' guy..."