I knew it! I knew Kobe's "historic" 81 points weren't all that special. Hell, you can buy them on eBay right now. The current bid is only 20 cents, which seems pretty low considering half the free world has been wetting its collective pants over these points. There are only nine days left in the auction, so don't miss out on this once-in-a-lifetime chance at buying canned ball-hoggery!

Kobe points
If you haven't placed a bid yet, what the hell are you doing?

On January 22nd 2006, Kobe Bryant of the LA Lakers socred an amazing 81 points in one game vs the Toronto Raptors.

You are probably wondering where all thoes points go after they are scored. Well they are added up on the score boards, people write about them in news papers, kids talk about them in school the next day.

But the actual points scored in all of the NBA games played through the entire season build up in a hole in my basement. They flow in through tubes in liquid form. And to be honest, it's a pain in the ass pumping that hole out every day. So when I heard Kobe Bryant scored 81 points in one game, I was kinda pissed. I never liked Kobe Bryant, but now I had to pump his 81 points out of my basement.

In a game, 81 points are quite impressive, but when you see them in person they don't look like much. They are kinda disgusting to be honest. They are a little dirty, kinda like Kobe.

So you are bidding on Kobe Bryant's 81 points. They are in a jar, in liquid form, as you can see from the pictures. I also scooped up the rest of the Lakers 41 points for comparison. The winner will get them too.

I'm sure someone in Canada is selling the Raptors' defense and pride, because they left that at home.
So there you have it. Not only can you own Kobe's points in the form of an oily jar of water from some psycho's basement, the seller is going to throw in the rest of the Lakers' 41 points for no extra charge! I should probably take this chance to mention that there are only 15 more shopping days until my birthday (hint, hint). Man, I'd love to uncork these babies in my pickup league.

Kobe-Laker points
The other Lakers' points are, of course, free of charge.