20110406-michael-beasleyMichael Beasley, or Chubby Checker?

Suggested reading: here is a nice summary of why Andrea Bargnani hurts the Craptors.

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

20110406-lakers-girlIf the Lakers need someone to shoot Kareem's sky hook in the playoffs, they can always turn to this dancer

20110406-josh-smith-joe-johnsonAwesomely awkward man love

Nationally Televised Games:
Bucks at Heat, ESPN, 8pm: Dwyane Wade might miss this crucial game for Miami's hopes of holding home-court advantage for the first two rounds of the playoffs. Ohhhh noooooo! Good thing they could play 5-on-4 like a hockey powerplay and the Bucks still couldn't score.

Lakers at Warriors, ESPN, 10:30pm: Thanks to the reference to Manos in the WOTN post, I will now hear Torgo's Theme in my head whenever I see Mamba dribbling.

All The Other Games:
Wizards Generals at Pacers, 7pm: Trey Kerby would like to remind us of things that have happened since the Generals' last three-game winning streak. Prepare to have your mind obliterated.

Knicks at 76ers, 7pm: This game has essentially zero effect on seeding for the postseason. Yet the Knicks are calling this "a big game" because they want some momentum heading into the playoffs. This really is happening. You aren't dreaming.

Cadavers at Craptors, 7pm: Craptors beat writer Holly MacKenzie sarcastically referred to this as a "barnburner" on Twitter this morning. I actually think that's a pretty appropriate name. If these two teams were playing in a barn, you'd want to burn it.

Magic at Bobcraps, 7pm: Here's a quote straight from the Stats LLC game preview: "The Bobcats are coming off back-to-back losses to two of the worst teams in the East and have dropped three straight overall." It can't be said any more on-the-nose than that right there.

Nyets at Pistons, 7:30pm: Deron Williams' wrist continues to be an issue. He might even miss the final five games of the season. So, I guess it's time for Jersey fans to watch the Devils go on their annual postseason run, right? Oh, wait...

Rockets at Hornets, 8pm: I don't get it. The Rockets just refuse to die! When did the zombie apocalypse hit Texas?

Suns at Timberwolves, 8pm: Ugh, this game depresses me. I'm just gonna go watch highlights from the Par 3 contest at The Masters. That's a good way to prepare myself for the Suns' postseason plans.

Clippers at Thunder, 8pm: Scott Brooks, confusing quote machine: "Almost is not good until you get it." But isn't it no longer considered "almost" when you do get it?

Nuggets at Mavericks, 8:30pm: Serious question for Nuggets fans: they've been on a hell of a run since the Carmelo trade, but are the injuries for Afflalo, Birdman, and Mozgov worrying?

Kings at Spurs, 8:30pm: The Kings have long been eliminated from playoff contention, but now they are "playing hard and together as a team," according to coach Paul Westphal. So why the hell didn't they start doing this back in December or January when it would have been useful??


Blogger Unknown said...
Bargs link has one of the most bawful pictures I've ever seen.

Blogger Will said...
After reading that article concerning Andrea Bargnani, I realized that I couldn't see this article coming out of ESPN for 2 reasons:
1. It was very well written and gave a fair cost-benefit analysis of Mr. Bagnani.
2. It was about the Raptors.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
"Knicks at 76ers, 7pm: This game has essentially zero effect on seeding for the postseason. Yet the Knicks are calling this "a big game" because they want some momentum heading into the playoffs. This really is happening. You aren't dreaming."

Am I missing something? I thought these guys were 7th and 6th seeds in the east. I assumed it WAS an important game. Correct me if I misread or forgot something though.

Blogger chris said...
the purple paupers probably would have played better in january...

...if the freak hadn't been hurting.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Kazam -- Maybe my math was wrong but it looked like their seeding won't change no matter how this game ends.

Anonymous Aaron said...
Is it the most efficient game for the Heat even if they lost to the Bucks? The Heat Index will have an article about that tomorrow.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
God knows I hate the Batman Robin jokes, but come Sunday, Robin better suck it up and set screens for batman. Alfred also did his part choking.

Inexcusable loss to a shitty team. Heat PG's deserve a separate section for bawfulness as well.

Anonymous snafu said...
Answer to the Nuggets question.

The injuries aren't that worrying because AAA and Birdman should be back very soon, with Mozgov's injury also not being as bad as first anticipated. Sometimes late season injuries can be a blessing in disguise as they keep players fresh for the postseason.

Best part of this current Nugs team is their depth, allowing them to beat quality opponents like the Mavs and the Lakers on the road despite injuries. I worry about the playoffs though since depth is way less important.

Anonymous Nico said...
Didn't think I'd see darko doing anything like this


Blogger LotharBot said...
I think the Nuggets' injuries have done the damage they'll do, keeping them from closing out vs the Thunder (think that 16-0 run happens if Al Harrington isn't playing center?) and therefore putting homecourt out of reach. The Nuggets are now pretty well locked into the 5 seed and will play either the Thunder or Mavs (if the Mavs keep sucking and the Thunder keep rolling) in the first round. None of these are chronic injuries, so it's likely everyone will be ready for the playoffs.

The slightly worrying thing is Wilson Chandler's possible ongoing ankle issue that nobody wants to talk about. It's clear he's not quite right, and it's not clear if he'll be able to rest it and be back to 100% for the postseason.

Anonymous bing said...
Last 3 Laker games, 20, 19 and 18 turnovers. Hard to win while being so careless.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Hubie Brown, dirty quote machine, "LeBron is the best at catching people from behind."

So now the Knicks have to play Miami, instead of Boston. Yawn.

Anonymous Aaron said...

I love this quote: "Nobody said this was going to be easy," Heat coach Erik Spoelstra said.

Actually...Lebron did. He fucking said that! So did Wade. Now I know what the problem with the Heat is - lack of basic communication between the coach and the players!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
LeBron has just bought a stake in the Liverpool Football club, the team I support. Why? Why has this been allowed to happen? It's making me feel queasy. God I hate how football has become.