20110330-john-wall-zydrunas-ilgauskas"I must break you"

Spencer Hall posted a stunning piece of literature yesterday: Everything need to know about John Calipari, to the tune of Steely Dan's album The Royal Scam. Even speaking as a fan of Kentucky Wildcat basketball, I approve of this piece. Behold the power of Steely Dan. (Seriously, go listen to that album while you read this. Do it. Great album.)

My favorite quote of the day is related to the sale of the Pistons. Or rather their inability to sell the team:
"The Pistons are officially that beat-up Camaro at the end of the street that's been on the block for two months. The "For Sale' sign has faded with dust and things are starting to grow around the wheels."

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

20110330-vince-carterOh, Vince. What else can you do to make me hate you?


20110330-vince-carter-2Oh. That.


20110330-jay-trianoHey, if you saw your mascot faceplant while on rollerblades like that, you'd have a pissy look on your face too


20110330-mark-cubanI bet Cuban would get along really well with that one Nyets fan


Nationally Televised Games:
Celtics at Spurs, TNT, 8pm: Hey! Who wants to watch two injury-riddled teams limp through the end of the regular season on national TV? (meekly raises hand)

Mavericks at Lakers, TNT, 10:30pm: The Lakers are 15-1 since the All-Star Break. Quick, someone go invent a time machine so we can go back to earlier this year when they were kinda sorta struggling! Or at least let us go back to 2004-2005 when Chucky Atkins, Chris Mihm, and Jumaine Jones were holding down the fort.

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18 Comments:
Blogger chris said...
Dan B.: You'll adore the Steely Dan mentions in this piece about the Kings relocation:

http://www.sactownroyalty.com/2011/3/31/2083504/sbnation-com-relocation-saga-bares-nbas-pretzel-logic#comments

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Mario West: Net.

Anonymous Bimbo Coles is a legend said...
Awesome buzzer beater from a little league game in Iceland. He hits it from waaaay back. Not exactly bawful but worth a look.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=CZLpXHNBpZY

Blogger Knockitdownagain said...
MARIO IS BACK!!!
Nyets sign Mario West to 10-day contract,

http://www.nba.com/2011/news/03/31/nets-moves.ap/index.html

God, it would be so perfect if he gets a Super Mario in his first game back... like fate or some shit.

Blogger LotharBot said...
Nominated for the Citizenship award this year: Ron Artest.

http://sports.espn.go.com/los-angeles/nba/news/story?id=6278704

This is part basketbawful and part basketbawesome. What a turnaround -- the guy was all kinds of unstable, got treated, and decided to raise awareness and raise money to help others deal with the same issues. But still, a guy whose name is synonymous with "going into the stands to beat on a fan" being nominated for a citizenship award is kind of shocking.

Blogger Preveen said...
Wanna party with Mark Cuban AND win a HTC Thunderbolt for good measure? :)

http://www.androidcentral.com/live-dallas-verizon-wants-you-win-htc-thunderbolt-and-private-party-mark-cuban?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+androidcentral+%28Android+Central%29

I'm sure there must be some people here who follow Cuban's twitter

Anonymous Koggz said...
Talk about setting a playoff attitude precedent...

There will be blood if the Lakers and the Mavs meet up in the postseason.

Anonymous Karc said...
Matt Barnes should get suspended. I think he threw one of the Mavs' assistant coaches into a woman on the front row and she needed medical attention. Barnes is a total asshole.

And what exactly did Brendan Haywood do to get thrown out? From what I saw, he was just keeping everyone apart.

Anonymous Karc said...
Throw Brian Cardinal in the "should be suspended, what an asshole" list, too. Provided nothing during garabge time but swings at Pau Gasol and baiting Shannon Brown into getting tossed when he'd finally seen enough. I was going to make fun of Gasol for going "White Swan" and taking the high road, but in this case, good move in not taking Cardinal's head off when they're within striking distance of the Spurs. Can't get suspended now.

And let's face it, aren't games like these the reason no one takes the Dallas Mavericks seriously? Even when they try to throw down the punk card, they just end up throwing out the Lakers' bench (which ended up being a positive for the Lakers) and could only put up 12 points in the 4th quarter.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
'Actor' David Beckham... caption fail

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/games/2011033113/photos;_ylt=ArL1ZYh1UEw25GnHZmcA3y2QvLYF?slug=4b0f34dc7cc5bfa80e21771db9567c65-getty-103884578hh022_dallas_maver#photoViewer=urn%3Anewsml%3Asports.yahoo%2Cgetty%3A20050301%3Anba%2Cphoto%2C4b0f34dc7cc5bfa80e21771db9567c65-getty-103884578hh022_dallas_maver%3A1

Anonymous Free Mario! said...
Knockitdownagain et al.: I just picked up my namesake in the Basketbawful Fantasy League.

Anonymous Thor said...
Nice statline for DeShawn Stevenson. Four missed shots and a plus/minus -7 in zero minutes!

http://scores.espn.go.com/nba/boxscore?gameId=310331013

Anonymous waylander said...
I don't think Jason Terry will be on the "should be suspended" list, he should be on the "will be suspended" list. That was one punk-ass foul.

Regarding Haywood, as best I can tell from the replays (which always ended right before I wanted them to), I think he got tossed for not shutting up. Haywood followed the ref toward the Mavs bench, ref seemed to tell him to back down, but Haywood didn't. He kept pointing at Barnes and mouthing off at the ref, then he got thrown out.

Anonymous Barry said...
Almost everything gets tired after a while but the Raptor Mascot video ages like a fine wine.

He needs to be in the banner.

Blogger Wormboy said...
Ugh, Calipari. I call BS on excusing him because NCAA hoops is corrupt (and it is). He's the NCAA corruption trendsetter, the worst of the worst, and somehow he's OK because the system is rotten? Isn't that sort of like excusing Bernie Madoff because Wall Street is so rotten?

I tease a friend of mine who went to Kentucky that they'll win a championship soon, and have it taken away a few years later after Calipari has left. At what price victory? He's like the devil in Damn Yankees, going from school to school and bringing temporary glory to those willing to sell their souls. By this time, everybody knows it; no excuses. You know what you get when you hire him. So what does that say about UK? And how do you stay a fan?

Anonymous Marylander said...
Karc Said..."Matt Barnes should get suspended. I think he threw one of the Mavs' assistant coaches into a woman on the front row and she needed medical attention. Barnes is a total asshole."

Say what?! It was Dallas assistant coach who grabbed Matt Barnes twice if you watch the video carefully. He was already walking to the bench. You just can't grab the opponent team's player like that. J Terry should get two game suspension and one game for the rest.

Anonymous Karc said...
@Marylander - I'll concede that it was a pretty bad move by Terry Stotts to grab Barnes from behind, Barnes didn't know who was touching him. But Barnes should have never been near the situation in the first place. This is his move, first shoving Jason Terry in retaliation (which is why Joey Crawford threw him out), then walking towards the Dallas bench. If he had turned around to see that it was an assistant coach, maybe he would not have immediately started throwing people into the stands. He was clearly looking to make things worse than they were. Then he caps it off by throwing his shirt into the crowd. Newsflash, he is not Dennis Rodman or Rasheed Wallace. Those guys were headcases who just happened to be really good players. Not getting the same sense from this clown.

Jason Terry is definitely sitting out a game.

Blogger Silly Bitch said...
at least theo ratliff didn't get ejected and won't be getting suspended.

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