"AAH! What is this round, orange thing?!?!"

Hope everybody in the midwest to southeast USA made it through the weekend's ridiculous rainstorms better than the Titan's stadium.

Worst of the Weekend in Pictures:

"Ooooh yeah."

I'm not really sure why referee Greg Willard is carrying a Mike Woodson cardboard cutout, but there you go.

Hey, I thought Melo had the support of fans in Utah?

Well, this is awkward.

Invisible baby

"Even though Kobe may be the Black Mamba, I bet he can't unhinge his jaw like a snake. But I can!!"

Betcha one of the words KG said here started with the letter "F"

Example #9285 of why Rasheed Wallace is bawful

Hedo Turkoglu would not approve of such an unenthusiastic display of "Ball."

Harry the Hawk dressed up as Michael Jackson to tell the Bucks to "Beat It."

Since when do basketballs have repelling force fields in them?

All The Games:
Celtics at Crabs - TNT, 8:00pm
Crabs lead series 1-0

Maybe by the time this game starts, Rajon Rondo will have recovered from that monstrous foul Shaq dropped on him late in Game 1. The Celtics better hope so, because he was the only person who could hit a freaking shot at times in that game.

Spurs at Suns - TNT, 10:30pm
Series tied 0-0

Is anyone else as jacked about this series as I am? If you're not, maybe you should read this and get back to me.

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Blogger Basketbawful said...
Great. Yet another year when I get to watch the Lakers beat the Jazz and the Spurs beat the Suns, topped off by the Crabs beating the Celtics while the major free agents (Wade, Bosh, et al.) spurn Chicago.

Grump, grump, grump...

Anonymous Sorbo said...
It could be worse. Do you really want The Drain 2.0 (Bosh) to come to Chicago? Love the pics, did Kidd run into Cardboard Woodson, too?

Blogger chris said...
Bawful: To think, in the mid-90s, Robert Parrish championship-piggybacked in the Windy City.

My how times have changed...

Blogger Dooj said...

At least the Magic are gonna win the championship.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Bawful -- Damn you for dragging me down with the truth.

If it makes you feel any better, Horry and Bowen aren't on the Spurs anymore, so the Suns have that going for them. That's about all I have going for me right now...

Blogger Basketbawful said...
To think, in the mid-90s, Robert Parrish championship-piggybacked in the Windy City.

Never happened. Parish was so high at the time he didn't even realized he signed with the Bulls. I will always believe that.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
If it makes you feel any better, Horry and Bowen aren't on the Spurs anymore, so the Suns have that going for them. That's about all I have going for me right now...

I just feel like this is going to be a typical Spurs-Suns series. SA is going to steal game 1 or 2 and then the Suns are going to be a step behind until their eventual elimination in Game 6. I can feel it in my bones.

Ginobili and Parker are going to have a field day. Unless Lopez gets better and fast, Duncan won't be stopped. Popovich will slow things down, the Suns won't be able to get open shots, their threes won't be falling due to hands in their faces, and...


Blogger Dan B. said...
Bawful -- Ugh. Double ugh. I feel like going and crying in the corner now. So yeah ... DAMN IT.

Blogger lordhenry said...
I still think the celtics have a trick or two up their sleaves, and I think this might be the year the Suns have their revenge on the spurs.

Celtic of War

Kevin Mchale flies through the air, smashing against a rock outcropping, and landing flat on his face. Throughout his legendary career, he had endured beatings, but none as severe as the one he was suffering now.
"Now that is an over and under!" laughs his tormentor, Kevin Garnett, as he stalks his prey.
Mchale, defiant to the last, struggles to his feet.
"You may kill me, Garnett, but mark my words, another Celtic will arise to take my place."
"AND THEY WILL FALL AS WELL!" Snaps Garnett as he takes Mchale by the head and breaks his neck.
Garnett turns finally towards Bill Russell, "What will you do now, Russell? There is no one to save you!"
Green rage glints in Russell's eyes "Insolent celtic! I SHALL TOLERATE YOUR INSOLENCE NO MORE!" and with that, Russell summoned a mighty green thunderbolt, and swatted Garnett as if he were a Chamberlain layup.
Garnett lay stunned, struggling to recover, as Russell towered over him.
"Do you have anything to say before I send you to early retirement?"
Garnett, looks up, and smiles, "Actually I do, UNBANTU!"
And with that, Paul Pierce and Ray Allen appear behind Russell, With Ray clipping the lendendary Celtic behind his mighty knee, and Pierce delivering a double-axe handle to the crippled Hall of Famer's head.
Russell knows the end is near, as the Big Three close in, he crawls away.
"Surely there must be something I can do to earn your favor? After all the playoff games I showed up for?"
Garnett considers, "Pitino told me you knew where to find the Basketball Jesus."
Russell laughs "And you believe him? That freak has fallen from the graces of the Celtics!"
Garnett looks at Pierce and Allen. "Very well, we will just rip him apart and divide his rings amongst ourselves....."


The Big Three turn, and are blinded by a figure bathed in golden light with golden hair, a slightly doughy physique, wearing a jersey that reads only "33"

To be continued.....

Blogger The Dude Abides said...
Brought over from the previous thread:

Mr. Bawful, I'm very disappointed that you haven't been talking about my new favorite player Kyrylo Fesenko, starting center for the Utah Jazz. How can you not love a player who Sloan believes was distracted by the balloons dropped from the rafters during the Game 6 introductions, leading to his worst game of the Denver series? "I think he was a little bit concerned about the balloons going off when he was starting the game," Sloan said. "Everybody has to have fun, but you've got to stay focused on how to play basketball. That's what we've said all along. He's got to continue to work at that."

That is one of my favorite quotes ever. I'm hoping that if he's ever in a situation where he catches a full-court pass on his way to a fastbreak dunk, some fan behind the basket rolls out a ball of yarn to distract him, he dribbles the ball off his foot and out of bounds, then dives on the ball of yarn and tries to push it away from his hands with his feet.

Of course, that scenario probably won't happen, because this is what he did on Saturday:

"The Jazz had Fesenko working on his catching with a ball-return machine before Saturday's practice."

Yeah, he'll probably drop that full-court pass, anyway.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Sounds like Woj's speculation of Del Negro getting fired are turning into breaking news sources.

Also, look at this:

"NBA commissioner David Stern hopes this summer’s free agency doesn’t take away from the rest of the playoffs.

Stern is concerned the future decisions of James and others will take away from the NBA finals and this summer’s draft. Free agency doesn’t officially begin until July 1.

What in the hell Stern? I also live in mystical happy unicorn land! This summer's free agency have already plagued every NBA story this year, and it will only get stronger! Everything affects it! People aren't waiting for July 1 to talk about it. Free agency will be a more talked about subject on May 18th BECAUSE of how the ping pong balls fall! In fact, I can't think of an NBA event which WON'T spur into a media discussion of this summer's free agency.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Oh my God, that "crab dribble" with a little over 9 minutes left in the 3rd was HORRENDOUS. How the fuck do you not call a travel on that? I don't care how big of a superstar did it. You have to call traveling on that. /facepalm

Meanwhile, damn. Rajon Rondo is an assist machine tonight. Unreal.

Blogger The Dude Abides said...
@Dan B. - That no-call on the crab dribble was comical. But it does appear that the King's elbow is really bothering him. Too bad for the Cavs that his pain threshold is about 90% lower than Kobe's.

Anonymous Sorbo said...
I'm amazed at this statline: 15min, 17pts, 7/8 FG, 3/4 3FG.

Rasheed killed it tonight. Too bad he'll revert back to Ra$heed.

Blogger stephanie g said...
I'm confused. Why isn't LeBron dancing? He's a fun loving guy I thought.

Blogger stephanie g said...
The shot, the drive, the fumble...the elbow?

Seemed like everyone was in on a conspiracy to make this game have as many bawful threads as possible. The freshly minted MVP sucking badly, Cleveland getting killed, lots of funny calls that make no sense, a mini-Boston meltdown, a fan throwing a beer bottle, fans booing Mo Williams, lots of silly "confrontations," Rondo almost getting the playoff assist record by messing around, Mike Brown looking clueless, and Sheed actually playing well. The only thing missing was KG punching someone and then running away.

Boston needs to exploit KG in the post against Jamison even more than they already do, especially when their offense transforms into deer in a headlight mode. That probably has a higher ROI than Rondo dribbling in circles or Pierce trying to bait LeBron into fouls when the refs are wearing Cav jerseys.

Cleveland still takes the series though, right?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Lebron's elbow has a twitter account! Follow him!



http://bit.ly/9YgdiS (at 1:09 mark)
So I wonder what Lebron calls "dribbling, jumping with ball held, landing, then shooting"? Frog dribbling?

Anonymous Barry said...
"I'm not really sure why referee Greg Willard is carrying a Mike Woodson cardboard cutout, but there you go"

He looks very 2D in that. His goatee is so perfectly trimmed it's kind of scary.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Hey Dude: Leave Fesenko alone. After years of watching Jazz ball with Ostertag, I'll take Fesenko and his ADD any day. At least in between - hey shiny things!

Stephanie - best opening post tagline ever. And yes, the Crabs will take the series. The Celtics are just too decrepit.

Bawful - careful. You're in one of your playoff tailspins. Not that it doesn't make it all true...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Kyle Korver/ Derek Fisher: