Cheer up, Melo! Don't you know how much the people in Utah love you?

I would say Happy 4/20, but since I'm not one to partake, I'll just ask the stoners to light one up on my behalf. (Thanks, Josh Howard)

I had to buy some new PC speakers since my old Dell ones were about as reliable as Francisco Garcia's exercise ball. While sampling the variety of speakers set up for testing at Best Buy, I felt like an NBA GM trying to draft college/international players and sign free agents. This might be a bit convoluted, but hear me out.

I could see how the different speakers sounded in the store, but this didn't really tell me about how they'd sound actually in my room on my computer desk. Much the same, just because a player looks good in workouts doesn't mean he'll be good when he's posting up a real player instead of a chair. (Okay, that was a cheap shot, Yi isn't that bad. But it's still funny, so roll with it.)

Also, every speaker brand except Bose was set up where I could hear the same exact music on all them. The Bose speakers had their own test display that obviously only played audio that fit the strengths of each model of speaker. (The interactive demo's voice told me to notice the clarity of the acoustic guitar on the cheaper 2-speaker system. Of course it's clear! It's all midrange sounds! You won't let me hear how godawful the bass sounds on these tiny speakers!) Similarly, you can only judge each player based on the system in which they play, and their current situation (i.e. teammates, contract year phenomenon). The $400 Bose speakers claimed to sound like a 5.1 surround system with only two satellites and a subwoofer. However, the sound quality wasn't very impressive to me (and a quick Google search on my phone confirmed reports of the sound being tinny and hollow). Buying those speakers would have been like a team signing Amar''''e Stoudemire next year based simply on his performance this season. You're going to pay out the ass for something that looked good only under ideal circumstances and probably won't perform like that later? No thanks.

The other speaker options ranged from the $25 Darko Milicic-ish Insignias (can fill up space, but otherwise utterly useless) to the $100 Logitechs that reminded me of Chuck Hayes (definately serviceable, but ultimately too small for what you really need). I ended up opting for the $150 Klipsch ProMedia 2.1 system. It seemed to have strong bass and warm midrange, and the highs seemed like they could sound good with better EQ from the source audio than what I heard in the store. I haven't gotten a chance to set them up and try them at home yet. Hopefully I got the Kevin Durant of speakers and not the Greg Oden where they break in six months.

(On edit, I have since set up the speakers and tweaked my EQ in Winamp -- holy crap these things sound fantastic. Well worth the money.)

In other news, Shaq's gradual descent into madness continues. (Via Deadspin)

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

Ilgauskas attempts to read Noah's mind

I would have said "Sloth from Goonies," but this comparison works too

That's not how you facepalm, JR Smith...

All The Games:
Bucks at Hawks - NBA TV, 7:00pm
Hawks lead series 1-0

The Bucks managed to keep things halfway interesting in Game 1 thanks to Brandon Jennings' 34 point effort. However, based on the way his regular season played out, the odds of him continuing to play out of his mind are roughly the same as the odds of Steven Seagal starring in a box-office-smash summer blockbuster next year. And John freaking Salmons can only carry a team so far.

Heat at Celtics - TNT, 8:00pm
Celtics lead series 1-0

It's probably fair to say that Kevin Garnett's best days as an NBA player are behind him. However, that doesn't mean the aging Leprechauns won't miss him and his hyperdestructive elbows. Think about it. Who gets more playing time when KG is out? That's right -- Rasheed Wallace. Sigh. Ball don't lie, and ball says you need to stop taking so goddamn many bad threes, Sheed.

Frail Blazers at Suns - NBA TV, 10:00pm
Blazers lead series 1-0

Here's a really sobering stat for you. Despite Phoenix being the highest scoring NBA team this season, they only managed to score a whopping four fastbreak points all night in Game 1. It's probably for the best that I won't be able to see this game (who the hell decided that it was a good idea to put playoff games on NBA TV??). It'll save me two to three hours of pacing nervously and contemplating taking up smoking.

Thunder at Lakers - TNT, 10:30pm
Lakers lead series 1-0

Yes, the Lakers won the first game of the series. However, they did it almost entirely on the strength of their monsterous first quarter. Once the young Thunder shook off the cobwebs of their first playoff experience, they started to play halfway decent ball and made it an interesting game. And that's in spite of the Thunder's offensive effort being ugly like Joakim Noah's face, with lots of poor shot selection and very little team-oriented play. This series really could be fun.

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Anonymous Jai said...
Bawful... David Lee got 1 third place vote for defensive player of the year. I thought that needed to be pointed out. I watched every Knicks game this year... and aside from being a glutton for punishment, I do know defense when I see it... and when I don't... ever... see it.

I LIKE David Lee... but...

Who's the joker who voted for Lee? He played as much defense this year as Eddy Curry.

Blogger Mike Lee said...

Blogger Dan B. said...
Post updated for anyone who cares -- these speakers are awesome.

Jai -- David Lee? What? Seriously?? David Lee's a solid offensive player, but I'd rather have the Inflatable Ben Wallace Defender guarding someone than David Lee.

Mike Lee -- Oh! I see what you did there...

Anonymous Chuck DeBruce said...
Speaking of David Lee, guess who's our newest 20-10-50 guy?
Apparently, bad things happen to players we like, too.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Oh yeah, don't buy Bose. They're one of the worst brands in terms of bang for the buck.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Anonymous -- Yep. I've never bought anything Bose and don't plan on it any time soon. I've never been impressed with the sound from Bose stuff. It always seems kind of flat and dull to me. Not to mention that it costs 3 times as much as the other brands. Still listening to my new Klipsch speakers while flipping back and forth between the Penguins game and the Celtics game. These things sound phenomenal. I have the subwoofer a little below the recommended 10 o'clock position on the dial (dial ranges from about 7:00 to 5:00) because the bass response from the satellites is so rich and powerful. And because these things are 200 watt, I barely have to turn the volume knob up.

Blogger Benny Profane said...
I love David Lee, especially watching him run the pick and roll. Also I feel a deeper connection to him because of his dominant performance for my fantasy team and because everybody calls me "David Lee" at the courts I play at.

But there is no universe in which David Lee should get a vote for Defensive POY. His post defense on drives basically consists of jumping, sort of reaching his arms out (but not really), and trying not to draw contact.

Blogger VT said...
Random question about the KG suspension vs. Q. Richardson fine thing. Richardson got fined $25,000 while KG got suspended for 1 game without pay. From what I've been able to find, in terms of financial cost, this is more costly to Richardson than Garnett. I couldn't find any data for the 2010 season, but the playoff payment pool for players on a team at Boston's playoff seeding position circa 2006 was only $23,170.6 (calculated by adding the figures for payments to the players based on having the 5th best record (which the celtics have) together with the first round participation payment, divided by 15, and assuming that many players on the roster). See http://www.insidehoops.com/playoffs-salaries-pool.shtml. Seems to me, because players earn their salaries for only regular season games, Richardson was penalized financially to a greater degree than Garnett. That seems a bit incongruous to me. What do you all think?

Anonymous kazam92 said...
I now know why you as a Pacer fan referred to Jermaine O'Neal as the Drain. He is the 6'11 Vince Carter. I dont want him near my team when this sweep is done. I hate the Heat right now

Blogger Dan B. said...
Brandon Jennings, 3-for-15 from the field tonight. Ouch.

Anonymous Sorbo said...
Put James Jones and Jamaal "Troy" Magloire back in. Miami is +10 when they play, according to the box score.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Please proceed to get sodomized by a dump truck Jermaine O'neal

Blogger Dan B. said...
Thank God, TNT has switched over to the Suns game. (With Ernie, and Chuck, and Kenny doing commentary no less)

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
So much for the Heat being able to steal a game after KG got suspended. 10 points in the 2nd quarter? Wow... just, wow. At it looks like his minutes went to Big Baby, not to the rotting corpse of Rasheed Wallace.. gadzooks, did Doc Rivers make some sort of competent coaching decision? Has the whole world gone mad?

And kazam92, we here in Toronto are familiar with The Drain's work as well. As we are Vince Carter's.

Blogger stephanie g said...
First sign your frontline sucks: getting dominated by a fat baby who can barely jump over a piece of paper.

They put a graphic up that said Baby gets 18% of his shots blocked!

Anonymous kazam92 said...
The thing is he had me fooled. He played well for us in the Reg season. Shot a career high FG%. So much for that. Whenever they showed his face on TV today, I spontaneously screamed FUCK YOU with middle fingers ablaze.

I just hope we can win one at home but thats unlikely

Blogger Basketbawful said...
I now know why you as a Pacer fan referred to Jermaine O'Neal as the Drain. He is the 6'11 Vince Carter. I dont want him near my team when this sweep is done. I hate the Heat right now


Please proceed to get sodomized by a dump truck Jermaine O'neal

[nods vigorously]

The thing is he had me fooled. He played well for us in the Reg season. Shot a career high FG%. So much for that. Whenever they showed his face on TV today, I spontaneously screamed FUCK YOU with middle fingers ablaze.

Welcome to several years of my life as a Pacers fan...years I can never get back. Look, my lifestyle of drinking and jumping out of airplanes strapped to nothing but explosives and supermodels is probably taking years off of my life, but those are the last, crappy years. The years I want nothing to do with. But The Drain took good years that I was actually using for shit (see above). I will never forgive him for that.

Now I will go try to wrap my head around the David Lee thing...

Blogger stephanie g said...
The last time Q-Rich talked smack to Boston was back in '07 when the Big 3 were first assembled. Remember that? And then the Knicks were demolished by like 50? I guess he didn't learn his lesson. The whole actresses thing was still worth it though.

FWIW, the Drain is shooting 4-24 for the series.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
I hope the Drain and his peg legs are benched for the rest of the series so he gets pissy and WANTS to leave. Joel Anthony and his hands of stone are our best option at center. Lets just use a 7 foot slab of hardened lard

Blogger Andrei said...
As a Frailblazers fan I'm quite happy with how the Camby trade went down this season. But why in God's name would they sign him to an extension before the season is over? Do NBA players really need any incentive to try less? Also, I'm not so confident that a guy who can't consistently make lay ups or dunks and played pick up with Moses (not Moses Malone either) is worth 20 mil over 2 years.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
The last time Q-Rich talked smack to Boston was back in '07 when the Big 3 were first assembled. Remember that? And then the Knicks were demolished by like 50? I guess he didn't learn his lesson.

Q is even a bigger fake tough guy than KG. And fake tough guy karma is a bitch, eh?

Anonymous Sorbo said...
Collins made a dumb statement about the lakers point differential this season is the second lowest for a PJ championship team. The worst? The 2001 team that swept the Western conference. Do your research, Collins.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Wow, Grant Hill 10-11 from the field really?

Anonymous Karc said...
Based on the way this Lakers team is playing (barely beating the Thunder at home by 3), I don't think they are going to be champions of anything.

There's a reason why Phil Jackson wanted them to win 60 games. Every 60-win team he's coached has won the whole thing.

Gotta admit, LOL moment when Kobe bonked a shot, committed two fouls in the first minute of the fourth quarter, and was rightfully benched.

Blogger Silva said...
Yeah since the Lakers can't blow out the Thunder at home they can't win the championship... Have you been watching?

The celtics had 7 game series against atlanta and cleveland in the first two rounds when they were champions. The lakers had a 7 game series against the sucky rockets last year and they won it.

So, Phoenix-Orlando in the finals.

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
Speaking of getting sodomized by a dump truck...

"But the Celtics used a 44-8 surge over the next 16 1/2 minutes to go ahead 69-37 with 5:38 left in the third quarter, capped by one of Allen's five 3-pointers in the period."

Ummm.. facepalm. That's not a surge, that's an annihilation. The guys I play pickup with would put up more resistance than that.