This is the most quintessentially Pau Gasol picture I could hope to findWorst of the Night in Pictures:
Woah, Cuban's looking a little scary. Is he gonna try to crush my head?
Nope, he's just going to crush Shawn Marion's head instead
Is Larry David drinking tea instead of coffee? Mocha Joe is gonna be pissed
Serious observation: Derrick Rose did not smile when he had to go through the MVP ceremony. I like that from an MVP. He just wants to get that crap out of the way and play.Nationally Televised Friday Games:
Bulls at Hawks, ESPN, 7pm (Series tied 1-1): So are we going to be seeing Boozer's picture on Chicago area milk cartons any time soon? Or, more appropriately, why haven't we already?
Lakers at Mavericks, ESPN, 9:30pm (Mavs lead series 2-0): I fully expect the Lakers to win this game by 30 points just to screw with my head. Nothing in the NBA goes as we expect it to anymore. After all, Dallas had lost 18 of their last 20 road playoff games... and then go take two straight in LA?
* * *
Nationally Televised Saturday Games:
Thunder at Grizzlies, ESPN, 5pm (Series tied 1-1): I love you, random Associated Press writers:
Call it the ultimate man defense. Grizzlies forward Shane Battier says he was literally boxed in when stuck in an elevator between floors for 25 minutes on his way to practice.Heat at Celtics, ABC, 8pm (Heat lead series 2-0): Super-duper depressing stat of the day per John Schuhmann: Score of MIA-BOS series when Glen Davis & Joel Anthony are both on floor (47 min): Heat 83, Celtics 52.
* * *
Nationally Televised Sunday Games:
Lakers at Mavericks, ABC, 3:30pm (Mavs lead 2-0 as of Friday morning): Trying to say anything about this game until we see Friday night's game is a waste of time. It'd be like attempting to defend Dirk Nowitzki's fallaway jumper -- it doesn't matter what you do, that thing's going in anyway.
Bulls at Hawks, TNT, 8pm (Series tied 1-1 as of Friday morning): Sebastian Pruiti retweeted this chart of pure, unadulterated pain earlier today: "Check Josh Smith's shot chart in the playoffs."
Labels: Bawful After Dark
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Worst of the Playoff Night: The Lakers are down 2-...Bawful After Dark: May 4, 2011
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Bawful After Dark: May 2, 2011
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Kidding aside, I'm excited for this de facto elimination game tonight, I don't have that awful feeling I had before, and especially after, game 2. What about you Dallas fans and Laker anti-fans? "My soul is prepared, how's yours?"
Linked by stephanie g in the last post.
In the Laker fan community we're trying to figure out who it is.
It could be Matt Barnes because that would by hysterically funny.
It could be Vanessa Bryant because she's insane and already ruined things with Karl Malone and allegedly has messed with other relationships in the past.
It could be Khloe just because that would be hilarious but it probably isn't because the other Laker wives have blacklisted her.
It could be Shannon Brown's wife Monica because Shannon and Pau just seem incredibly off right now.
This is what we've come to as Lakers fans. Trying to figure out whose wife ruined Pau Gasol's life and thus ruined our season.
I'm about as depressed as Pau is right now, I'm going to load up some My Chemical Romance videos on youtube and wait for the game to start.
Lakers down 3-0. Stick a fucking fork in them. Goodbye!
@Basketbawful - Agree with that pic of Gasol losing / flailing away at the basketball, plus shocked / pain-stricken face, particularly after minimal i.e. non-life-threatening contact from an opposing player. What a fruit cake. Puts to rest all that "best big man in the game" horseshit that's been foisted upon this soft-ass during the last three years. Dirk Nowitzki is the best big in basketball.
What should LA do? Bynum #1 option? Go at Dirk? Tell Kobe to take 40 FGA a la '06 Kobe? And where's that wired segment so we can hear Phil's colorful advice to Pau and Bynum.
....
Goodbye! Me am so sad Lakers mini-dynasty coming to an end. Me am hope Lakers have huge comeback in series. Kobe am looking like Jordan in clutch. Gasol am better player than Nowitzki: Nowitzki biggest choke artist in series. Me am wallow in gloom when series end; Laker Basketball am thing of beauty to watch. Hello!
This feels more like 2004 though, with an unlikely team exposing all the Lakers' flaws. Really Lakers? With everything on the line and an eight point lead, you couldn't just ram it inside every time? You thought those jumpers you'd been missing all series were still the way to go after getting the lead going inside? Even the two Kobe makes over Kidd to keep the lead up made me wince, because I already knew where it was going down the stretch.
Anyway, congrats to the Mavs, this felt like a revenge series, not for you, but for all the other hard-playing underdogs the Lakers lazily rolled over this decade. All that's left is to enjoy is the delusional hope of a 2004 Red Sox situation; unfortunately, I think it's pretty clear Pau Gasol ISN'T on steroids (sorry Boston fans, I know this has nothing to do with you). Once that's over, if it wasn't for Dirk and Kidd, I'd probably turn total heel and root against the Mavericks no matter who they played, even the Heat (at least they're worthy... see, it's already happening).
So please, pretty please, don't just say the Lakers choked and give the Mavs credit for taking the game right before the window slammed shut?
However, this will make me even more happy if they do win the series.
I don't really care who wins it all this year. I'll be happy with Boston, Dallas, Chicago, Oklahoma City, don't really care about Atlanta and Denver and really don't want it to be LA or Miami.
They are, in fact, the anti-Lakers. First, let me say one thing. By scapegoating Pau Gasol (I guess we need to distinguish which Gasol we are discussing these days) the fans, media and teammates are minimizing his chances of pulling his game together. I call that a Lakers organization fail. Second, how do you blame all of the defensive lapses on Gasol? How do you blame Gasol for the Lakers playing one-on-one ball in the fourth quarter? The Mavs are locking down Pau, fine. Can't the Lakers move the freakin ball and get open shots? The Lakers of previous years would have this series much closer. This is not taking away from the Mavs, but the Lakers are not playing good playoff basketball. On paper the Lakers team should be able to beat the Mavs, even if Pau blew out his knee. In practice, the Mavs are executing the way champions do (see the execution of championship Spurs) on both O and D. They might not have the spring and talent to win it all, but they are doing things right. The Lakers are not.
Look at their assignments. Who is guarding Kobe? Who is Kobe guarding? Single coverage by Jason Kidd's grandfather is slowing "the best player ever?" Horse shit. Kobe has a beautifully efficient game last night, but he once again failed to be a franchise player in the 4th quarter. Dirk stole his lunch money, and Dirk is playing like an MVP.
Where is fucking Bynum? Odom? In what universe do you guys not utterly dominate in this series? We're not talking a Perkins-Garnett front line here. Bynum at least is playing well.
But the real curse of the Lakers? PG and the bench. The Lakers are outmatched from 5 through 9, and not particularly excelling at 1-4. Frankly, I think Bynum is more valuable to the Lakers in this series than is Kobe. When Barrea is a problem for you, you do not deserve to win a series.
So yeah, Gasol is looking bad, but the hounding of him only makes him worse, and he is marking by far the best player in the series. Also, the rest of the Lakers are just not what they used to be. So as somebody said, stick a fork in it. I'll add my two cents: stop whining and stop scapegoating, you pussies. The Lakers had these weaknesses all season. We all debating whether they could flip that switch. The answer is no. It's a team that is past its expiration date.
So can we finally retire this utterly ridiculous mantra of "The Lakers are just TOO BIG UP FRONT!"? Look, size matters, in life and basketball, but how much empty and lazy analysis have we seen by *ahem* sportswriters who predicted a Lakers win based on the fact that "They have TOO MUCH SIZE!" and nothing more.
In the past the Lakers have won because they were a more disciplined and talented basketball team than their opponents. Not just because they were taller.
But really, before this series started, the only reasons listed by the experts for a Lakers win were:
1. They're taller
2. They're the Lakers
No real basketball analysis at all. In fact, most of the analysis of this series on the interwebs has been backward-looking and focused on SEASONS ago, when Dallas lost and/or the Lakers won.
That was then. This is now. Oh, happy day!
That was the key. With Dirk and Kobe, if they get the shot off they're gonna make the shot or miss the shot whether they're doubled or not. Dallas played this well and Kobe missed. LA played this poorly and Dirk made the shot or got the assist.
Also, it doesn't help that the Lakers get so one-dimensional in the 4th that I'm tempted to call Kobe 'the 1st dimension', even if it's a stupid nickname.
@Tristan: I get you, my comment sounds like something from a dickslinging ESPN sportscaster. But I really think that is true. The Lakers have been more talented than the level they've played at for the last few years, including this year. But at some point age will erode your talents so that you'll only win if you play up to your potential. Since they rarely have, why should they now? They REALLY ARE past their expiration date. But granted, the comment is far too cute.
@toT: At some point in the second half, Kobe was something like 7 of 9. He was having a remarkably efficient game and non-volume game up until the second half of the 4th quarter. When he does that, the Lakers are a far better team. However, down the stretch Kobe (and Odom) both made a number of "me against the Mavs" plays. Kobe also hoisted at least three wild long shots at the end trying to catch up. So if you look at Kobe up until crunch time, he was have a great game. Not coincidentally, I think, that was when the momentum shifted to Dallas. Again, it's about executing your game plan. It's also, as Bynum said, about trust. Unless one team is far better than the other, the team that plays a better team game will win. Ask Shane Battier. {Ugh, did I just deferentially reference dookie?}
http://espn.go.com/espn/page2/index?id=6499749
If Kobe says anything about the Lakers' struggles that doesn't start and end with his own personal limitations out there, he's just adding to the evidence that he's the worst kind of hypocrite.
The man's in full-on "Game 7 vs Suns" mode and looking for someone else to blame for screwing up Phil's 4th 3-peat.
AK Dave - You're mostly right, but when they say size, they're talking talented size, which is what they've won on more than anything. The most frustrating thing about this team, even when they won championships, is that instead of dominating like they could, they always did just enough instead of working hard every possession (for the perfect counterexample, see the '08 Celtics). As far as their past discipline goes, they've always done the things that are killing them in this series, they're the same bad habits, only they've gotten away with them past couple of years. Ignoring their bigs, being inefficient in crutch time, taking bad shots, not hustling. It finally caught up with them against the perfect team to punish them for their sloth and hubris. Dallas plays the right way AND has the eye of the Tiger, just like the '04 Pistons.
Of course, you've got the chemistry-ruining nonsense of him taking his frustrations out on everyone else, but that's all stuff that's on TOP of the fact that Kobe just isn't playing that well.
And what makes Kobe suck as a teammate is the he's too concerned about deflecting blame onto someone else to be an effective leader who builds confidence in guys who are struggling.
Pau has the thankless task of trying to stop arguably the most unstoppable guy (on his day) in the league. Certainly top 3 by anyone's reckoning?
I know, I know, just being optimistic... but hey, it ain't over till Khloe Kardashian sings...
Meanwhile, Dallas and Memphis for the Western Conference Finals? I can imagine the look on David Stern's face.
Also, if Pau really is all broken up over his longtime girlfriend, I propose that we refer to him as P*ssy Galore...
"We knew there were going to be three or four emotional parts to this game, that was one of them, we didn't play well."
Yes Coach, they're called 'Quarters', there are four of them, never three.
i think pierce needs his wheelchair badly..
from yahoo sports:
http://d.yimg.com/a/p/sp/ap/6f/fullj.723a8f56e772abce22f9dc2bfbeab393/ap-201105072203793941899.jpg
in other words, am I crazy for thinking he intentionally tripped Rondo (not saying he intended to dislocate his elbow, just intended to bring him down)?
If he does, then surely Spoelstra will have his defender a minimum of four feet off him or force him left. As bad a shooter as he is normally, with one hand...
I was actually thinking a bit differently - the Heat's easiest finals match up is gone. The Heat seemed to have the Lakers figured out this season. OKC and Dallas on the other hand were big problems for them this season.
Yeah, laugh it up, donkey. Do you know nothing about medicine? Did you watch the freakin video? Injuries are different than cocky player predictions. I've played through a soccer game with a cracked radius, and an ultimate tournament with a broken finger on my throwing hand. In each case, I was out for a couple weeks afterwards. I've also separated a shoulder, which knocks you out much longer. Heat of the moment (pardon the pun) and cortisone might have gotten Rondo back into the game, but I doubt we'll see him again this round (or at least, we shouldn't.) That was a serious injury with some inevitable ligament/tendon damage; you DON'T bend a joint that far out of it's normal path without stretching the shit out of some tendons/ligaments, maybe tearing one. Also, letting him back into the game was idiotic. If he hit the same joint again, he could have a career-ending injury. Likely? No. But that weakened joint could just bend right over and snap tendons with a bad luck fall.
I guess we'll see the degree to which Rondo can play one-handed. Me, I'm skeptical. But I will say this: the game was totally weird after that injury. It's like it sucked the life out of the Heat (well, and also fired up Rondo's teammates). But I also noticed that the Heat didn't go right at Rondo. It was almost as if they subconsciously conceded the game once he came back in.
All that aside, hat tip to Rondo. That was a heroic performance, and there's no way he was faking THAT, as people always said about Pierce, or Kobe.
Maybe he'll prove me wrong. Maybe he'll continue to play. But a) that's a sketchy career move, and b) he's not going to be nearly as good one-handed. The Celtics look creaky (despite this one throwback game that was half Heat letting up), Shaq may literally weigh 450 pounds, and they needed top-form Rondo to make it back to the Finals. Granted, an elbow is not a knee. He can run and jump with that joint disabled. But unless he's taking cortisone shots every game, he can't play. And with the cortisone shots, he can't play well. Celtics are done.
Meh, Wade was clearly dicking around with Rondo. But I think equally obviously Wade was NOT trying to cause an injury. That was just a freak fall. Foul called, no suspension is my take, and I'm a bona fide Heat hater. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU7-xOdEhzs
LeBron calls a reporter's retarded question retarded:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91JlOqzxp_w&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Westbrook had one of the craziest team killing shot jacking games in recent memory! Usually when it starts up with most players the coach takes a time out or the team leader tells them to stop or else. Not here though. It was allowed to happen for half of the 4th quarter and all of OT.
Let it be known that for one game a soon to be 35 year old KG was better than prime Wade, LeBron, and Bosh put together. Not even the 28/18...the help and recovery was insane. LeBron and Wade couldn't go anywhere. Although I dunno about LeBron. It seemed like he was waiting for Wade to bail him out again.
I wonder if these guys look at Boston's crisp offense and ask why their team can't be like that. They should.
I'll put if this way, I give the Lakers more of a chance to win at Dallas than if the game was at Staples Church w/the white angel uniforms. And by a "chance" I mean "start the boat."
I'm still waiting for Mark Cuban to reveal that he started the Pau Gasol breakup rumor.
"(Jackson's) five kids, however, aren’t taking any chances.
Said coach Phil: “They think they have to hustle in just in case this is the last game that I coach,” Jackson said. “That’s a drag that I don’t need to have happen, but they’re coming anyway because they’re insisting upon it.”"
So... your kids are flying across the country to show support and that's a "drag that you don't need to have happen."
Phil Jackson for Dad of the Year! This is right up there with Michael Jordan's HOF speech where he told his kids "I wouldn't wanna be you!"
@Nightdreamer - The way pierce needs his wheelchair every playoff game i am not surprised Wade did not care, not that his attitude is not blamable but still, if guys were faking it less that might change.
Meanwhile, Chris Bosh was bashful. His coach, Erik Spoelstra, partially explained Bosh's puny six-point, five-rebound performance on a "slightly pinched nerve" in his neck after Bosh woke up with some discomfort. Bosh might've wished his coach hadn't mentioned it, claiming a crick in the neck on a night when Rondo called to mind Willis Reed wasn't going to help matters.
Really, I can't figure any other take on it. I'm also trying to figure out why the Heat looked so out of it afterwards. It's almost as if Rondo's ugly injury, and then his astonishing return to the court, really shook them up. Odd.
Regardless, it was very dramatic. I was telling my wife that it is this kind of stuff that gets me to watch the playoffs. Real, unscripted human drama. Freakin Rondo. That was bad ass.
But yeah, bummed out. The one day the bench plays well, Bosh soiled himself and LeBron was ice cold.
http://www.petitiononline.com/abcdwtf1/ Most of you hate the Heat, but this needs signing nonetheless.
I had planned a beautiful Mother's day with my family and away from the pains of watching this three year semi-dynasty come to an end.
But destiny and health are against me today. Food poisoning will keep me glued to the T.V. for the next few excruciating hours.
4 Weeks ago this team could beat the crap out of the "League of Justice", "X Men" and Avengers all together at the same time. Today, the best one can hope is that they don't lose by 20 or 30.
Finally Kobe's age is showing, Gasol's psyche is breaking down and the team entire's chemistry out the window. Not a good day for watching basketball.
Once the Laker reign is over, all I'll have left is a bunch of teams to root against for the next month.
Coming to think about it, the only team I got nothing against would be the Memphis Grizzlies. In my perfect world the Grizzlies take it all in June while delivering a big FUCK YOU to either Chicago, Miami or Boston.
Peace out and go Memphis!
Rondo's return deserves the work of a photoshop wizard. Being no good at that myself, I can only hope someone else will step up to the task: Please, pretty please with sugar on top, Mr.Wizard, do a Rondo/Monty Python and the holy grail mash-up. :)
HOW DO YOU LIKE THE CELTICS NOW?!
Kobe: 6-8
The rest of the Lakers: 2-11
It's not just the return of '06 Kobe, it's the '06 Lakers!
*frantically searches for an online stream*
http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/607650/artestdunk.gif
Just another blowout loss to end the Lakers season. (2008, 2006, 2004, 2003).
A proud day for Los Angeles. On the bright side, the fallout from Lamar's ejection will make for a great storyline on Khloe & Lamer.
Sums up the game pretty well, I think
If I'm a Mavs fan, I'm a little worried about that 3-point shooting. Honestly, if the Lakers could actually hit some 3's, this is more than likely a tied series instead of a sweep. What will the Mavs do if Marc Gasol has to guard Dirk, JJ Barea runs into Kendrick Perkins, or Jason Terry goes cold?
If Memphis hangs on against OKC, could they knock off the Mav's too?
@Wormboy - Never underestimate the forearm of a champion? I was hoping Pau would ask Dirk to pretend he hit him so that he could be a fake tough guy like his teammates and get ejected too. Similarly disappointed that Phil didn't try to dislocate Rick Carlisle's shoulder during the handshakes. Would have really out a bow on Mother's Day.
BTW, after THIS, does anyone think Phil Jackson DOESN'T come out of retirement for at least one more season somewhere? He basically has nothing to lose now and everything to gain now by doing that. It couldn't end worse than it just did for him.
Also, Brian Cardinal and Luke Walton are now trending topics on twitter.
I'm going to bed happy now.
Congrats to the Mavs. Memphis, Dallas, or (gasp!) Boston all the way now.
Someone at ESPN needs to hedge their bets; or at least play devil's advocate.
OTOH, Charles Barkley predicted a Mavs win. Turns out, Barkley actually knows something about basketball.
He finally did. I almost hope he wins with the Mavs. Except that I'm still gunning for the Bulls ahead of them. And the Thunder. But hey.
By they way, does that elbow injury of Rondo's look horrifyingly familiar?
Just kidding, I only wanted to know what it felt like to be so pathetically bitter toward a team that's clearly better than mine.
Speaking of which, lost in all the Phil Jackson and "Yankees Lose World Series" hoopla is that the Mavericks swept the Lakers and played about the best a team can in a closeout game. So, congrats to the Mavs and their fans, and good luck. I'll be rooting for you on account of Dirk and Kidd and because the Mavericks outclassed us literally and figuratively. Plus, if the Mavs win it all... hey, we only lost to the eventual champs, right!?
Yes, he's had a past history of doing this before
Example 1
Example 2
Terrible, but I still think he's awesome for building his own computers.
@Anacondahl: "Terrible, but I still think he's awesome for building his own computers."
Meh, doesn't that just mean that unlike most NBA players, he can count to twenty without taking off his shoes? Nah, you're right. That is kinda cool.
PS I love how intense Noah is. This is a guy who would suck if he didn't care so much and try so hard.
Oh, and I really liked Rose's MVP acceptance speech. Real, heartfelt, no ego. Imagine how other guys do it, and then look at Rose. Granted, I don't think he's the best in the league, but it was a nice moment for those of us, like me, who are a bit maudlin.
Regarding Bynum's bitchassness - I guess just because he's big he thinks it's okay to do that whenever he gets frustrated? You can tak hard fouls and still go for the ball.
Also, it seems ironic to me that he could have blocked all three of those shots.
Regarding Pau - So he increases his marshmallowy goodness when he's all broken up? Those Gasolt/Boshtrich s'mores are looking better and better...
And Rondo - that was crazy, man. It LOOKED kinda like Livingston's injury, but it didn't bend as far and (as someone who has had microfracture on each knee) to me, leg injuries are generally worse than arm injuries. Not to say they're not bad. Because they are.
It's entirely possible for him to play in Game 4 since there was no ligament damage, but it will be very painful.
Last thing - is this the most commented on post in Bawful history? Over 120 comments.
A few months ago Kazam said he was "giddy" when the Celtics traded Perkins because in his mind their probable Finals opponent just torpedoed the team. Guess it really didn't matter after all.
The Celtics may not beat the Heat with virtually everyone that matters injured (Pierce, Rondo, Shaq) or old (Allen, Garnett, JO) but they at least showed a little bit of heart against adversity.
The Lakers didn't. Goodbye Phil Jackson and his championship piggybacking and goodbye Ron Artest.
Sigh, we had a great run. 3 final and 2 championships is nothing to sob over. I just hope that the FO retools this team for next season, if there is a next season.
Odom and Bynum - retarded douches
Pierce - where the fuck is my wheelchair?!
Rondo - Hero
MAvs - hat off.
Dirk - MVP
Miami - 7 rings! not even cheat fans believe it.
How awesome would it be if the Grizzlies won the championship this year? Sounds unreasonable, but talk about what could be one of the greatest underdog sports teams ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRGCgA0UWKY#t=2m25s
That's pretty much what happened.
Kobe: "Get OFF!! EEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHH!!"
here's a pic of kobe telling all of us that he's got 5 rings and also a facepalm on a sad bench photo!
http://d.yimg.com/a/p/sp/ap/f6/fullj.acee2a5c9efcbb9f165a90f3770fa21c/ap-201105081820660334231.jpg
http://m.espn.go.com/nba/story?storyId=6510363&hcId=5657762&topId=null
Please can we stop that misconception already? Dirk nearly always comes to play in big Games. Just look at his elimination Game Stats and his Game 7 Stats, also you can look at his 4th Quarter Scoring and what he's done on International tourney's.
I really hope the guy gets a title as the alpha dog. Man i hated him early in his career (The hype in the German media was to much), but his chocker label is just bullshit, losing or winning is a team thing...
Also loved how Phil had his "Hey, I don't even care anymore"-smirk going for the complete fourth quarter.
Speaking of which, anybody catch the extended Barkley-Webber argument about whether it was reasonable for Derrick Rose to take 32 shots? Iverson blushing indeed (and for the record, Iverson NEVER blushed about how many shots he took). Seems like that is the fundamental NBA debate, at least offensively. Some just admire a large point total, other prefer efficient scoring. But Kenny has a point: that volume is OK if Rose is shooting well. But some of his shots were Kobe-esque. The Bulls do need some other offense. Thibs is great, but the "hand to Rose" approach reeks of Mike Brown and the Cavs. The Bulls are doing lots more cutting than the Cavs did, but sometimes the ball movement dies with Rose. Not sure we can blame him, since Booz is sucking so bad.
Speaking of which: go here and see how Boozer's numbers drop after each new contract. What a bum!
http://www.basketball-reference.com/players/b/boozeca01.html
My bad Kazam.
As for tonight's game, if the Heat don't win they're in big trouble. The Celtics are leaning on the one armed Rajon Rondo, the one legged Shaq, the gimpy knees of Jermaine O'Neal, a one foot Paul Pierce and the creaky bones of Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett. They're "too hurt, too old, not good enough" but a win tonight will put endless pressure on Miami.
After all, how could Miami lose to a team that's too old, slow and injured? If they go back to Miami tied they could very well crumble. After all, Miami usually chokes when the games are close.