20110503-kevin-durant-james-harden"I want to curl up in your beard like it's a hammock and take a nap"

Some bullet points:
1) Damnit! We missed out on Andray Blatche's Lapdance Tuesday at a Miami Beach club!

2) Boston is building a Bill Russell statue. It is expected to be the Celtics' starting center in Game 3.

3) Seriously unsettling news for me: Vince Carter loves bowling, and even watches professional bowling on TV. Vince, why do you have to do things to make me even consider liking you? You know how badly I want to hate you. Can't a cool baller seriously take up bowling? A lot of them do it, but other than Vinsanity, Chris Paul is the only guy who takes it seriously. And he's not even that good at it to be honest. (Good thing he's got that whole basketball thing to fall back on, you know.)

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

20110503-lebron-rondoIn retrospect, Rajon Rondo's "roll around like Sonic the Hedgehog" defensive strategy was decidedly flawed
(Also, this picture makes for a totally sweet album cover)


20110503-scott-brooksWhenever I see Scott Brooks, I assume he should be closing a business deal at a TGI Friday's instead of coaching an NBA team


20110503-lebron-glen-davisThe last time two bodies this large collided, the moon was formed


Nationally Televised Games:
Hawks at Bulls, TNT, 8pm (Hawks lead series 1-0): I encourage you to go read Kelly Dwyer's piece on the NBA's most valuable player. Then, especially since Mother's Day is coming up, go read Holly MacKenzie's piece on Derrick Rose thanking his mother.

Mavericks at Lakers, TNT, 10:30pm (Mavs lead series 1-0): I don't care if it was deadpanned. Kobe's "I'm not clutch" quote makes me smile.

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30 Comments:
Anonymous Flud said...
From DOOWWNNNNntown with caption!!

Well played \m/

Just watched Kobe's ankle twist again... I think he just tripped and was too embarr-assed too admit it. Knee-jerk feigning. They're mad for it here in Europe.

Anonymous Omedee said...
Just watched Kobe's ankle twist again... I think he just tripped and was too embarr-assed too admit it. Knee-jerk feigning. They're mad for it here in Europe.



Trip or not, it's obvious that he twisted it.

Anonymous TransINSANO said...
Had a bad feeling about this game, and that first half wasn't encouraging. Lakers either still don't get it, or they've finally broken the switch and this is just who they are now. The Mavericks also have the perfect combination of mediocrity and competency to lull the Lakers to sleep and actually beat them like that.

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
Lakers down 15 with 4:30 left.. Christmas came early this year!! JJ Barea is making them his BITCH, as pointed out again and again by TV guys.

Anonymous Karc said...
I'll take Mark Cuban's gloating, because now the Lakers are all but done.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
I only want to watch the version of the new Pirates movie with Ernie, Kenny, and Chuck in it.

Anonymous Karc said...
Mr. Citizenship finally with the meltdown I've been waiting for 2 years. That was completely dumb. He is going to get suspended for Game 3. Dare I say it, Mavericks sweep?

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
There's this big-ass grin on my face right now despite being absurdly tired from too many consecutive EST nights watching these playoffs, and I want to blame it on Stevenson chest bumping Mark Cuban while walking off the court, or J.J. Barea saying "hella screens" in his post game interview, but I'm pretty sure it's due to the general idea of the Lakers going down 0-2 at home.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Ron Artest suspended you say? Luke Walton playing time to the rescue!!!

Anonymous TransINSANO said...
I don't want to sound ungrateful for the last three years, but is it possible to trade Pau for Dwight Howard before game 3?

Anonymous bing said...
Pau booed on his home court. Transformation into Kwame Brown almost complete.

Anonymous tabman said...
@TransINSANO - all i can say is, suck my dirk. i kid.

the series is far from over. lakers are great on the road and the mavs really don't play much better at home than on the road (had almost identical home/road records). of course i am just trying to stat curse the lakers.

co-worker keeps earnestly asking my friend who is the 2nd best player on the mavs. that's the thing about them, they don't really have a 2nd best player. just dirk and a bunch of guys who may get hot and beat you. mavs fans hope that one or two of them show up for any given game (last night, hello barea!).

funny thing, for all their reputation as chokers, mavs were actually the last team to come back to win a series after losing the first two games at home, back in '05. hope they can keep these lakers off that short list!

Anonymous Cetti said...
I do not have words for that:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AddwFbCS8g&feature=share

Blogger Will said...
Anaconda HL- whenever I hear "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" I just think of all the porno tie-ins with that title.

Blogger Ragib said...
We should all make accounts on Lakers forums and troll them hard. Ask them why they told us to "WAIT TILL JUNE, YOU'LL SEE". See what? Photos from Vacation?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
How the hell are fans gonna boo Gasol? He basically gave them a title appearance the past 3 seasons. I didnt see them booing Kobe when he misses a layup, or back when they had no big man, Kobe was averaging 35 ppg and blowing series leads to the Suns. Lakers fans are retarted

Anonymous Stockton said...
Miami - Dallas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous Stockton said...
What a season!!!!

Sloan is gone...

Duncan & Pop say bye bye...

Now looks like the ZenMan is going fishing earlier...

End of an era (what was left of it)?

Anonymous TransINSANO said...
Tabman - Appreciated, I deserve worse for disrespecting the German destroyer. Also, I like that you're keeping it classy and cautiously optimistic despite the circumstances, it's the way to go. And no need to stat curse, stick a fork in these Lakers because they're done. Series over.

Ragib - Gee, it's like they were literally entitled for some reason? I can't think of why they'd have confidence in their back to back champion team. Anyway, Laker vacation footage has been coming in all season. Thanks for the memories, but after this year even I don't think they deserve to win.

Blogger Solieyu said...
The Atlanta Hawks are like a team where Vince Carter plays every position. You'll occasionally get a game where Vince is hot and the refs are friendly where he goes off for 30+ points by shooting a ton of threes.

Then you'll have Vince who is who we think he is where despite his freakish athletic talent is completely apathetic, has no will to win, and settles rather than challenges. Atlanta should change its name to the Vincibles, because they're pretty much the opposite of invincible.

Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2011 Atlanta Vincibles!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Am I the only one who NEVER finds Bawful After Dark funny?

Anonymous Barry said...
While I enjoy seeing the Lakers in a 2-0 hole, I just can't shake off that these are the Marshmallow Mavs and the reigning champs...imagine the smugness of Phil and Kobe if they manage to get out this.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Crazy Pills out for game 3 actually HELPS the lakers.

Blogger Cortez said...
"The Mavericks also have the perfect combination of mediocrity and competency to lull the Lakers to sleep and actually beat them like that."

This is a great observation.

This Mavericks team is 85% warmed over garbage. I looks as if everyone on the Lakers is expecting for them to simply collapse onto themselves.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
@Anonymous troll at 10:24am:

Yes. Yes you are. You are also missing the point. BAD is all about having an updated forum for the evening games, looking ahead instead of looking back, and throwing in some light humor and entertaining links as an added bonus.

Dan B is not your personal court jester, so go post on BDL if you want to complain about something not being funny.

And if you didn't at least snicker at the beard caption, you might want to check your ass for any sticks that might be lodged up there.

Anonymous tabman said...
gotta say, i love the BAD posts and do find them funny. keep it up Dan B!

Blogger Dan B. said...
Thanks guys.

Blogger DDC said...
Yeah, the troll is way off. BAD is awesome. Dan B. = kick ass.

Anonymous Big D said...
No kind sir, thank you.

Anonymous bing said...
"Anonymous Anonymous said...
Crazy Pills out for game 3 actually HELPS the lakers."

^^THIS.

Ron might be the only Laker player happy to see the back of P-Jax, he'll hope the next coach says "fuck the triangle" lets run something dumb ass over here can get his head around.

Anyone know why we don't see Bynum, Gasol, Odom, Kobe and Fish/Ron in crunch time? Sitting either Bynum or Odom seems crazier than, well, Ron Ron.

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