APTOPIX Nuggets Bucks Basketball
Oh, damnit, the CarmeloBot 5000 is acting up again. Anyone know the phone number for a robot repair guy?

Two more games before we hit the All-Star break. You know what that means... it's almost time for the annual Basketbawful Null-Star Game. Rosters are being determined right now, and I will simulate the game in NBA 2K11 and post it on Youtube sometime in the next few days. I hope to have it done sometime this weekend, but I can't guarantee it. I can guarantee this: it will be worth the wait. You know you want to see shot-clock violations, bricked threes, over-and-back violations, and lots of poor basketball players aimlessly standing around.

Worst of the Night in Pictures:

Nets Celtics Basketball
Hmm, this looks familiar...


Clippers Timberwolves Basketball
Is dropkicking Chris Kaman in the head really necessary? (The answer is, of course, yes)


20110216-chris-bosh
A quick smack in the nether region is one way to tell Bosh "welcome home!"


Nationally Televised Games:
Spurs at Bulls, TNT, 8pm: The Spurs are having their best rodeo trip (6 of 8 wins so far) since the 2002-03 season. As you may have guessed, that same Spurs team won the title. I don't wanna stat curse anything (seriously, unlike last night, I really don't), but I think I speak for every other team in the league when I say this: oh snap!

Mavericks at Suns, TNT, 10:30pm: Wait a second... the Mavericks are already stupid good, so they added Peja Stojakovic, and now they've also gotten Rodrigue Beaubois back on the court? Tonight could be their 13th win in their last 14 games. And things just got interesting out West...

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47 Comments:
Blogger Unknown said...
This has to be mentioned:
http://www.nba.com/2011/news/02/17/magic-bird-play.ap/index.html

NEW YORK (AP) -- The playwright behind the Broadway play "Lombardi" is moving from the gridiron to the basketball court.

Eric Simonson is working on "Magic/Bird," a new play that will chronicle the lives of Hall of Famers Larry Bird and Magic Johnson.


I don't know whether to be amused, frightened, or some combination of both.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
A lot of people have varying views on NBA's all-star weekend but screw them. This is maybe my favorite weekend of the year. Starting with the bawful celebrity game.

Blogger winnetou said...
Looking forward to the Null-Star game. :) Based on the kind of fu-treatment nba 2k11 gives myPlayer every couple of games, that should once again be fun to watch from the spectator seats.

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
Please....please....please...PLEASE could the writer of the Magic/Bird play cast Dule Hill in the role of ML Carr?

Anonymous Czernobog said...
These... These are actually two really good games.

How often have we been able to say that on regular nights this season, not to mention nights with only two games?

Anonymous CRjoe said...
Not to bring the 'Melodrama over here to Bawful, but as I keep seeing Knicks fans outraged with Landry Fields being the tipping point in a possible deal for 'Melo, I just can't stop thinking how much Fields reminds of Josh Childress...

Childress line as a rookie: 10.1 ppg, 6.1 rpg, 2.0 apg. 47% from the field and 24% from 3. PER 15.2

Fields current stats: 10.1, 7.1, 2.0 apg. 52% FG and 40% on 3 pointers. PER 14.2

Should a deal for 'Melo be rejected over Landry Fields, I really hope the Knicks management know something I don't.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I nominate Yao Ming for Null game. I'm curious if the game will give him the injury we all know he would get in the first quarter.

I also nominate the entire cHeat bench as a whole team. It sucks that they take a bunch of spots, but seriously. Seriously.

Anonymous Arouet said...
Carmelo is a headcase. That's why they're reluctant.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...

Blogger JerryT said...
Looking at how the chicago spurs game score... you guys here at Basketbawfull start to get really professional at statcursing...

... let me also try that one: any team from now, up until the last finals game, can EASILY win with phoenix, just like that... no? not working?

Anonymous Marc d. said...
Kazam: agreed 100% NBA all-star weekend is by far the greatest of the big 4 major sports and is generally my favourite weekend of the year as well. All they have to do is make the actual all-star game count for something like MLB and it has the potential to be epic.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Ehh, I don't watch MLB but I know the winner gets home field advantage in the WS. I wouldn't like that in the NBA.

As long as the game gets competitive in the 2nd half and is down to the wire, I love it. Last years game was fantastic (Wade MVP ftw!)

Listening to local Miami Sports radio, people are wondering how The Heat and Celtic players will "work." Wade and Pierce in particular do not like each other (as do I and all of Florida).

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
HCA would be horrible for the NBA Finals, as out of the four major sports, home court affects basketball the most.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Yeah because in NFL and MLB, they stop n go, stop n go. Basketball is back and forth, momentum is massive

Anonymous Anonymous said...
i like this blog and enjoy reading it almost every day..im a Trailblazers fan, can you guess whats coming? cut the frailblazers sh1t, now its entirely possible this comment will be mocked or ignored, but I really like coming here and feel like if the Blazers were a bad ball team i´d get it, thats what you do here, punish bad teams with jokes...but they actually dont deserve it and you know it, as we Portland fans obviously dont need to be reminded of the bad luck/curse/whatever every fu(kin day.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Bleh. Horrible execution down the stretch. Suns gave that one away and Dallas was solid.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
@ Anon

If you hope to stop the mocking this way, then hope is frail.
Like the Blazers.

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
To the last anonymous poster....if the Blazers actually stayed healthy nobody would be calling them that.

Look at the bright side, least it isn't 10 years ago when everyone would be calling them the JailBlazers.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Anon -- As soon as your ENTIRE GODDAMN TEAM stops getting injured every season, we'll stop calling them the Frail Blazers. :) Seriously, it's not because we don't like your team. It's just that they are BY FAR the most constantly injured basketball team I have ever seen in my life.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Haha, that Anon post is exactly the type of "Portland Soccer Mom" post Simmons decided to joke with, twice, in his latest column. Go back to Blazers Edge, buddy.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
We could change it to Ail Blazers?

Anonymous SportingLisbon said...
all right Dan B. was just a sugestion for my personal enjoyment

AnacondaHL- dont be jelous just cause your fanbase sucks a$$...Blazers regular season homecourt is more intense than Phoenix in the playoffs buddy...and im a fan of Simmons work, and not even from Portland or american for that matter..just happens I like NBA ball and support the Blazers, who by the way with half the team injured are still FAR BETTER than the shitty a$$ Suns...

hahahahahha, you are the fu(kin joke here buddyboy

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
There has never been a more appropriate Basketbawful nickname for a team than Frail Blazers. Application denied.

This website is for mockery, not butthurt fanboys. Go back to your "Everyone is mean to me all the time!" sharing circle, Anon. Say hi to Justin Beiber for me!

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
SportingLisbon - I am deeply jealous of your ad hominem skills.

Anonymous Matt said...
So a guy says that he likes this blog and enjoys reading it almost every day but doesn't think it's fair that they're called the Frail Blazers? So what is it that he enjoys about the blog? Oh, I see, it's OK if someone else's favorite team is getting mocked, but not his team.

Bleh, butthurt fanboy, indeed. The Other Chris hit the nail right on the head.

I understand that it's not that much fun to see your own team mocked. I'm a Pissed-ons fan (and I'm a little sad that hasn't seemed to really catch on, since I've been saying it for over 20 years), and I might not personally enjoy it when they're rightfully skewered, but since when does my team get immunity? Only if they're good, and the Pissed-ons don't qualify, ergo bring on the mockery.

As others have said, if the Blazers were healthy, they wouldn't get the Frail moniker (although I'm sure that someone here would come up with something equally clever and appropriate).

Anonymous SportingLisbon said...
the other chris- i know its appropriate, couldnt be more...if i was a buthurt fan boy i wouldnt enjoy the content here so much.

you seem to be like one of those future serial killers america tends to create at a higher % than say, europe, where i live..whats with all the rage?! you cant get chicks to be wih you? you dont like them at all? you dont like yourself that much? settle down loser

Anonymous SportingLisbon said...
Matt, I dont want immunity for my team, far from it...but how many good team here have their name shitted on 100% of the time? thats right, one fuckin good team, so the exception is Portland, not the other way around..if they were a bad team put the monikers you want, thats what this blog does well..this was my point

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Well there's this team called the Heat you see...

Blogger Dan B. said...
Dude, "Frail Blazers" isn't shitting all over the team. It just sounds funny. It's such a perfect name! It's not talking about how good they are at basketball. It just points out the FACT that the team has more injuries than the rest of the state of Oregon combined. Get over yourself.

(And hell, Charlotte doesn't even really suck all that bad anymore, and we still call them the Bobcraps because it, again, just sounds funny.)

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Okay, as fun as it's been, we can stop feeding the troll now.

Anonymous The Other Chris said...
you seem to be like one of those future serial killers america tends to create at a higher % than say, europe, where i live..

AnacondaHL - I win.

whats with all the rage?!

Lol. Umm, pot, kettle, black.

Is MySpace running out of room? Or insane asylums are directing the inmates here?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
The less deserving teams are of being mocked, the more fun it is to mock them anyway ^^

Anonymous SportingLisbon said...
anaconda, truth hurts doesnt it, bout the suns that is, but i agree, over with.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
No, I'm pretty sure everyone here except you recognizes that you fall under the more common "makin shit up" category of ad hominem.

Blogger chris said...
Hey, I named the Kings "Purple Paupers." Enough said. :D

BTW, how can Portland NOT be the Frail Blazers when its very best player of ALL TIME, I TELL YOU, OF TIME IMMORTAL IN GALAXIES KNOWN AND UNKNOWN...

...went from being the reason that the Blazers have a title, to a regular on the IR and a disgruntled not-quite-free-agent asking for a trade?

Yeah, this nickname has fit for 34 years and should never leave.

Blogger Wormboy said...
@SportingLisbon: Wait, were YOU the guy filmed yelling out the window at the Lakers in Boston? How cool!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Why can't we all just get along? Or at least submit more nominations for Null-Star game?

Anonymous Czernobog said...
We seem to have a Portuguese reader, guys. Do you realise how marginal Basketball is over there? He might be the only fan there.

Hell, he might be an international Player!

Anonymous AK Dave said...
I thought Dallas was going to lose for sure last night when I browsed the sports page and saw that the Mavericks were "surging."

Also: we need a foot-in-mouth watch for this quote by Suns coach Alvin Gentry:

"We will come back after the All-Star break and we will play good basketball and we will find a way to make a run and get in the playoffs.”

Doesn't this guy read Basketbawful?? Doesn't he know he could be cursing his team to years of sub-400 basketball?

Finally: Peja and Dirk are like "Perfect Strangers," only with two Balki's.

Blogger The Cruise said...
I'm a Portland fan, and that anonymous dude can go blow himself. If he's that thin skinned he must be from Gresham.

We are the Frail Blazers. The only reason our best ever franchise player was Walton is because the the guy who would have been our best ever player got drunk and fell down a flight of stairs before he ever played for us.

Our curse are so powerful that they work in absentia.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Applause for The Cruise

Anonymous Barry said...
That Gentry quote is gold. Commence the Suns-Watch!

Poor Steve Nash.

Blogger draftaraujo said...
Gotta give it up to Portland, they pack that arena and there are like 500000 in that city? Cant take anyone named "sportinglisbon" seriously, that club hasn't been relevant in 30 years..

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
lol @ Lisbon saying Phoenix is inferior.

Blazers haven't been to the finals since 1992 and guess who made the finals the very next year, Phoenix.

Blogger bullzag said...
@KHayes666 not sure if you've noticed but Portland won the season series this year.....

Also @sportinglisbon: I'm a Blazers fan as well but seriously? This team is hurt more often than it rains in Portland. The nickname fits, as depressing as it may be. Deal with it.
*facepalm*

Blogger The Sports Hayes said...
Bullzag, I'm well aware and the Hawks beat the Celtics 3 games out of 4 last year. Lot of good that did if you get the point.

Anonymous SportingLisbon said...
dont know what null all star is exacly (didnt know the blog last year) but Sean Marks for NullStar MVP.