During a recent interview with Pistons.com, Tracy McGrady let the world in on a little secret: Tracy McGrady is back. No, really.

"I feel good -- I feel really good. What I can tell you is the stuff I'm doing now, I couldn't do that when I was playing for New York. I'm going to surprise a lot of people. What people saw in New York, if that's the type of player they think I'm going to be, man, they've got another [sic] think coming."
What people saw in New York was an aging volume shooter with diminishing physical skills who couldn't come to grips with his basketball mortality. Whew. I'm sure glad we won't be seeing that this season.
"I'm so used to going 100 miles an hour in the offseason. I came in here the first day and worked out with [Strength and conditioning coach Arnie Kander] and I looked at him after the workout and said, 'Is that it?' He said, 'Yeah, that's all you need.' I'm like, what? I'm used to coming into training camp in tip-top shape. He said, 'We don't want you coming in in tip-top shape -- we're going to use camp to get you in that type of shape.' It made sense. He said if you come to camp in tip-top shape, your body is going to break down (eventually). I never really thought of it like that."
So the Knee-Mac injury mystery has finally been solved: He was in too good a shape. His body simply couldn't handle being in such good shape. Because when your body is in tip-top shape, it breaks down. Remember how that used to happen to Michael Jordan all the time? And how it happens to Kobe Bryant. Hey, wait...

"I don't care if I don't make the All-Star team."
That's a relief. Because I think he's suffered enough crippling disappointments, don't you?

"What I'm saying is I want to get back to that caliber of player that I know I can be, that elevates the team, that gets the team to the playoffs."
Can McGrady get back to being the kind of player who leads his team to a first round playoff elimination? I don't know about you, but I believe he can.

"There's no question [I get back to being an elite player]. There is no question. Yes, because my body feels good. I'm in great shape. I'm in better shape than I've been in for the last three years. I'm a lot leaner. I'm telling you, a lot of people are going to be shocked. That's all I've got to say."
I look forward to being shocked, Tracy.


Blogger AnacondaHL said...

Anonymous Heretic said...
It makes so much sense. See being in shape is circular, once you go past the marker of "perfect physical specimen" then you've looped back to "knees composed of cotton candy and the stamina of Mickey Rooney".

Yup, when I watch Knee mac hobbling and panting up and down the court my first thought is "This is no man, this is a god!".

Blogger David Landon said...
I think we have our 2010 winner of the Isiah Thomas Award for Self-Delusion.

Anonymous JJ said...
Detroit Pistons. 2010-2011 season NBA champions. Tracy McGrady Finals MVP. I said it first. Anyone else who says it is just jumping on the bandwagon.

Anonymous Heretic said...
To continue the "Carmelo Anthony is so totally loyal" topic:


So apparently the Lakers are going to waltz their way back into the Finals. Spurs haven't made any big moves, Dallas is basically the same, Portland will be raped by injuries yet again, Phoenix is still shitty, Maybe this is Oklahoma's chance to show what they're made of?

Anonymous Stockton said...
The Jazz are going to ##### kick some ###### Lakers butt!!!! Oh yeah!!!! I just wish Boozer-Looser would have read the previous post while he was a jazzman, so he could play some $%#&%$ DEFENSE!!!!!

Anyway... it's nice to see McGravy is back. I miss his playoff runs... Miami should have got McGreedy... wade + T-Mac&Cheese, plus Lebron, Bosh and Magloire would make an invincible team.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
So ESPN ran an article on "Who will be the team of the Decade?"

One of the "experts" said the Clippers. I had a good laugh, figured I'd share.

Blogger Unknown said...
Anon: There's always somebody like that. It's the advantage of predictions like that. If you get it wrong people tend to forget about it. But if you get it right, you look like a freaking genius and can say "Told you so" until the end of time.

And Heretic: The Lakers do pretty much have it made in the West again. Nobody's seriously closed the gap with them and though it would be really interesting to see another playoff battle between LA and OKC, the Lakers addressed a lot of their defensive problems against them in the off-season. Of course how this all pans out remains to be seen.

Anonymous Late said...
Whilst some of the comments by McGrady and in the article itself were humorous and way out of whack, Arnie Kander is well-respected as a great conditioning coach.

Look at Ben Wallace's knees. Definitely some wax-on, wax-off action. :)

Anonymous Karc said...
@Stockton - What "playoff run?" Tracy never got out of the first round. No man named Tracy should ever make it out of the first round. Still irks me that "Tracy" guy at 30 Rock is getting a fifth year.

Blogger lordhenry said...
Sorry I didn't get this up earlier in the week. I post these from work, and didn't get the last one up till late on monday. Also, this is all just me taking a joke of bawful's and running with it---he is the originator of the "Dark Lord."

Deep in the mountains of L.A., the recruiting campaign of the Mamba has been derailed by two giant Celtics.

Mamba attempts diplomacy with the Celtic of War and Sith Heel O'Neil:

"I speak of something that threatens us all, and after all the complaining about last year's Finals, I figured you would jump at the oppurtunity to stack the deck in your favor."


Shaq jumps in. "Kob, we didn't come here to join forces with you, we came here to warn you--stay out of our way. The Nazgul are ours. Once I-I mean, WE defeat the Miami Cheat, no one will deny that I am the most dominant ever."


Shaq winces, "Damn KG you need a volume control. But, yeah that is essentially the idea, along with equaling your ring count, of course."

The Dark Lord is impassive. "Of course."

"Just so long as we understand each other, Kob. Now tell the rest KG."


Proclamation delivered, The Celtic of War walks to the nearest wall, headbutts a hole in it, and climbs through.

Derek Rose is the first to speak:

"So they are gonna take on the Heat and everyone else all at once. Who do these a$$holes think they are?!"

Steve Nash answers, "They think they are Celtics, Derek--Celtic Pride is what that is. Too bad, we could've used them."

The Dark Lord smiles, and there is admiration mixed with hatred in that smile.

"Fear not, Steve, they did exactly what I expected they would do. Their nature demands no less."

Anonymous Karc said...
Gold mine quote from Kobe Bryant on the Heat...

"They've basically formed Voltron."

Commander Keith is Riley, Bosh is clearly Lance. I'd say Sven is LeBron, substitute the "injuries" that Sven got early in the series for LeBron's ego in the past two playoff seasons (I also propose changing his name to LeBurnt every time he fails in a game this year). I almost want to make D-Wade the Princess because of all the makeup he wears during the T-Mobile commercials, but he's better than that. Seriously, this can last for weeks.

Well done Kobe, well done.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
It so TOTALLY makes sense!!

Being in great shape all the time clearly hasn't worked for Kobe or Nash or Fisher or any of the other 34+ year old players in the NBA. Why should a guy like McGrady, with a history of injuries, try crazy experiments like "fitness" when he has a PROVEN FORMULA FOR NBA SUCCESS already??

This guy is so ahead-of-the-game. McGrady for MVP!! MVP!! Come on, we're going streaking!! Bring your green hat!

Anonymous Barry said...
T-Mac to be the leading scorer of the 10-11 season COMING OFF THE BENCH.

Oh yes. Recognize!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I remember reading a piece like this last year. In it t-mac was saying stuff like, now I can dunk one foot off my left foot, I haven't been able to do that in years.

I was pretty stoked thinking, maybe ill grab him for my fantasy team... shit he can dunk off his LEFT FOOT!

Well that worked out well. Just like his season with the pistons is going too.

P.S. Tod MacCulloch is the NBA's true T-mac

Anonymous Hellshocked said...
Hahahahaha. It seems McGrady has reached that level of self absorption where he believes that if he simply says something emphatically enough he can not only rewrite history but also alter the future.

Going 100 miles an hour in the off season? The dude was a notorious member of the Allen Iverson school of off season physical conditioning. Back to where he was? Pretty much everyone who saw the Bulls workout said that he lacked explosiveness and lateral movement and about all he did was shoot the ball okayishly.

This level of delusion is irksome enough when it comes from a future hall of famer blowhard like Shaq (remember when he said he would retire when he was only as good as David Robinson? He hasn't been as good as him in about 6 years), but when it comes from a never-was-even-though-he-should-have-been like Knee-Mac? It's absolutely hilarious.

I don't necessarily believe playoff success or championships are always a great indicator of a player's true value, but if McGrady's career could be summarized in one moment it would probably be the 2009 playoffs when a Rockets team partially built around Tracy made it out of the first round and gave the Lakers all they could handle for 7 games in round 2, all while he was out with injuries.

Anonymous Stockton said...
switch your sarcasm detector back on please... :)

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Which team with legit playoff aspirations in the West improved the most this offseason? Naturally I'm just talking about improved "on paper" since we have to see how everything plays out, but I'd say that it's probably either Portland or Houston (if their injured guys are healthy), but otherwise it might be the Lakers.

I bring this up just because I see some people here saying if Melo leaves Denver then LA will just waltz to The Finals, and biased though I may be, I'm inclined to agree. Not only have none of the other real threats in the West to LA done anything to improve (other than get injured players back), but LA seems to be the only team in the West that really upgraded their roster. Now that LA actually has a bench, if everyone stays healthy (a big if), the Lakers might have a really easy go of it this year.

Till they get to The Finals, of course.

Blogger Unknown said...
I'll second what Late said. I'm a long-time Pistons fan, but I have no illusions about this season (with our 13 swing-men plus Ben Wallace lineup) or that McGrady will be anything like his prime self.

BUT, Arnie Kander really is an ace conditioning guy, and if anyone could get the best of whatever McGrady has left in him, it's him.