Los Angeles Lakers - missed their opportunity to kick Utah in the Jazz and go up 3-0 on Friday, losing 99-104. Kobe held up his share of the bargain (34 pts, 6 boards, 7 assists), but the rest of the purple people choked up 14 turnovers on 7 assists. Horse blinders or Vaseline hands? I hope it was the blinders.

Dwight Howard - found a way to lose at home to a de-Billupsed Pistons squad on Saturday. The Magic were falling back on their heels and were outscored 46-34 in the second half, losing 89-90. No coincidence that Superman went 3 for 12 and was outscored by the Wonder Twins (aka Jameer Nelson and Maurice Evans, 15 each).

Boston's backcourt - The Celtics inexplicable road stinkage continued Saturday, losing to the Cavs 84-108 on Saturday. Ray Allen and Rajon Rondo suddenly turned into Ron Mercer and Sebastian Telfair. Shuttlesworth went 4-12, and Rajon Rondo had zero assists in 24 minutes. Sam Cassell went 0 for 6 and Tony Allen almost had himself a 4 trillion. And they were collectively destroyed by Wally Szczerbiak and Delonte West (combined 37 pts, 8 asts, 11-21 shooting).

Ben Wallace - complete with ear infection, had his best postseason game Saturday with 9 pts, 9 rebounds, 2 blocks and a made free throw. Who woulda thought Ben's key to success would be an infectious disease? I'm sending that monkey from Outbreak to borrow his toothbrush and cough on his pillow.

James Posey - No frustrating Celtics loss would be complete without a heaping spoonful of unprovoked James Posey thuggery. Where have I seen this before?

Kobe Bryant - The Lakers played the Jazz tough for 48 minutes on Sunday. Unfortunately, the game went into overtime, so the Lakers lost 115-123. Kobe literally hurt his back from carrying his team all night, and scored 33 points on 33 shots. As the old adage goes: the worst shot in the game is the one you let your teammate take. Or something like that.

Ronny Turiaf - I expected an "E-C-Dub! E-C-Dub!" chant to break out after Ronny gave Utah backup Ronnie Price a swinging neckbreaker on Sunday. Unlike Posey, Turiaf had the decency to at least pretend it was a defensive play (albeit after the whistle). Oh my...GAWD!
David West - shot a sickening 4 of 15 from the floor as the Hornets were (insert bee-related pun here) by the Spurs on Sunday 80-100, tying the series 2-2. I wonder if Tim Duncan mockingly tapped him on the cheek, or if Fabricio Oberto applauded his ineptitude? The Spurs have stolen the momentum from the Hornets, which is a bad thing. The Spurs are the Jason Voorhees of the postseason (except slightly whinier and Duncan Face-ier), never consider them dead until you see them die. And never make the mistake of killing their mother.

Labels: Worst of the Weekend