We recently received an e-mail from Sam Rubenstein of Slam Online
. It provided a link to an article called Vince Carter and The Tape
. Since we're hate-coated bastards with an arsenic filling, we were hoping for something more incriminating, like a video of Vince with a stripper, or Vince with a hooker, or Vince with a porn star. Or, better yet, a stripper with a hooker and a porn star. With lots of whipped cream, baby oil, a bowl of fruit, and maybe a midget. That would have been cool
Instead, it was a video of Vince uncorking some of the sickest, in-your-faciest, rim-rattlingest dunks you'll ever see in this universe or any other. Watch it and you will remember why Shaq called him "Half man, half amazing" after the 2000 Dunk Contest.Warning:
Watching the linked video can cause an onset or relapse of Vinsanity. This disease cannot be cured (unless you're Canadian), and treatments are not covered under any major medical insurance plan. However, symptoms can be surpressed by watching any 2006-07 New Jersey Nets game and focusing on Vince Carter jogging lethargically between the three-point lines and hoisting up 25-footers for 30-to-35 uninspired minutes.Le dunk de la mort:
"The dunk of death." That's what the French media called it when Vince leapt up and dunked over 7-foot-2 Frederique Weis in the 2000 Summer Olympics. This is the single most spectacular dunk I have ever seen. If you're too lazy to follow the link to the Slam video...then for god's sake, get off your butt and get out of your parent's basement already! There's a yellow ball of fire in the sky we like to call "the sun." Get to know it. Or you can just watch this...