The video comes to you courtesy of The Hoop Doctors.

Now...there are so many playoff previews out there. They can provide you with facts, figures and stats bursting out of body cavities stats never meant to be stuffed into. It can be overwhelming.

So you won't get that here.

I'm serving up heaping helpings of truth pie. Throw on a scoop of ice cream, heat it up in the microwave, and enjoy.

Pacers-Bulls: According to Danny Granger, this was Indy's preferred matchup. Because if you stop Derrick Rose, you stop the Bulls, right? And the Pacers are going to stop him. Yep. I'm sure that's how it's gonna go down. Bulls in 5.

Sixers-cHeat: The Sixers spent the entire season digging out of a 4-13 hole only to lose five of their last six games and earn a first round matchup with the cHeat. All that work for a first round sweep. It's kinda sad. cHeat in 4.

Knicks-Celtics: Last year, the Celtics staggered into the playoffs like their hearts had been ripped out Mola Ram-style. And the way they finished the season had a lot of people picking the then-Heat (now cHeat) to upset them in the first round. Instead, the Celtics rose from their stupor and took care of business. New York is gonna get the same treatment. Look, I don't care how many points the Knicks score...if you can't keep somebody from punching you in the face repeatedly, you're going to get knocked the hell out. No defense. No Celtics in 5.

Hawks-Magic: I almost want to give this series "Upset Special" status. But did you see how bummed out the Hawks looked over their last several games. It's like the reality of Joe Johnson's contract finally sunk in. Magic in 7.

Grizzlies-Spurs: Memphis tanked down the stretch so they could play the Spurs. They were obvious about it, too. And the popular thing to say about the Griz right now is "they can beat anybody." You know what, thought? They can also lose to anybody. And they will. Spurs in 6.

Hornets-Lakers: Could the Lakers have lucked into a better matchup? David West is out and Chris Paul is dragging around a dead leg. That's right: Choking down the stretch of the season actually helped them. Freakin' Lakers. L.A. in 4.

Frail Blazers-Mavericks: This season, the Mavs extended their streak of 50-win seasons to 11. And I predict that they will also extend their streak of first round exits to four out of the last five years. Blazers in 6.

Nuggets-Thunder: Oklahoma City has become the popular pick for "The Team Most Likely To Knock Off The Lakers." I'm not buying it. But I do think they're going to bring Denver's excellent post-'Melo run to a screeching halt. As the Rockets have shown us repeatedly over the past few years, a plucky spirit and can-do attitude will take a team only so far. In Denver's case, "only so far" is a first round playoff exit. Thunder in 6.

Labels: playoff predictions

Playoffs, baby! They start today. Go do your last minute prep work by reading the Western Conference playoff previews I wrote for Deadspin. They're better than sex. Trust me.

Denver Versus Los Angeles: The Nuggets Are Gonna Get Shelled Series

Dallas Versus New Orleans: The Mark Cuban Finally Has A Coronary Series

Utah Versus Houston: The "Which Shoe Is Gonna Drop?" Series

Phoenix Versus San Antonio: The Rivalry Renewed Series

Labels: NBA playoffs, playoff predictions

That's right: We're talking about playoffs! Here's where I predict what's going to happen in the first round of the Eastern Conference playoffs with such infallible and unerring accuracy that you don't even need to watch.

Atlanta versus Boston: The Execution Series

Philadelphia versus Detroit: The Feel Good Killer Series

Toronto versus Orlando: The "Now Here's A Series" Series

Washington versus Cleveland: The "LeBron Gets Knocked Out In The First Round?!" Series

The Western Conference previews will be out later today.

Quick pimping: Many of you have commented on our nifty new banner, and if you read the playoff previews, you'll notice the totally sweet graphics. They were created by Basketbawful reader Stephen, who recently started a blog called Stephen's Designs. The dude rocks. Go check out his site. He does custom designs.

Labels: Eastern Conference, Jim Mora, NBA playoffs, playoff predictions

TrueHoop ran a post yesterday called Handicapping the New East in which "a bunch of bloggers, journalists, insiders, and lovers of the game" predicted how this year's Eastern Conference playoff race is going to turn out. You can go there for the full story, but here's the Basketbawful contribution:

"The playoff teams are Boston, Chicago, Cleveland, Detroit, Miami, New Jersey, Toronto, and Washington. You'll notice that, for the most part, these are the teams whose core players have been together the longest. After all, consistency usually = winning. These picks are, of course, contingent on key players remaining healthy, Dwyane Wade and Gilbert Arenas each making a full recovery, Shaq choosing to play more than half the season, and Vince Carter not wimping out now that he's got a new big-money contract. The Celtics, thanks to the additions of Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett, will improve the most. The Bucks and Magic will fight a losing battle for the final playoff spot. The Bobcats, Hawks, and Sixers will surprise some people. The Knicks will continue to disappoint, much to chagrin of their fans and the delight of everybody else. There's going to be very little separating the top eight teams. Any of them could advance, although my heart says Chicago and my brain says Detroit for the Eastern Conference Finals, with the Pistons moving on. Of course, Cleveland, Miami, and yes, even Boston all have a legitimate shot at reaching the promised land. Wait, Boston's still coached by Doc Rivers, right? Okay, scratch them."

I also predicted that Lebron James would be the MVP of the East. This isn't to say he's necessarily going to be the best player or have the greatest impact, but I think he'll do the most of everything (points, rebounds, assists) and look really spectacular doing it. The media seems to love him, even though they grudingly admit he can't play defense and doesn't have a jumpshot. The clunky jumper is my biggest gripe, though, considering how much he likes to bomb away from the outside.

Anyway, we'll see in, oh, about eight months how close to the mark I was.

Labels: Eastern Conference, playoff predictions