Basketbawful reader Jon sent in a link to this old Adidas commercial where Kobe goes one-on-one with a hapless child. Mamba goes after the kid with the kind of pitiless rage I would expect from King Leonidas, slapping his shots halfway to Abu Dhabi and dunking over him. Note that the title to this post is only a joke. Kobe doesn't hate kids. He hates everybody He's a competitor.
Note: I've received a lot of good submissions over the last couple weeks that I haven't had the opportunity to post. I'll probably do a compilation of them soon. And then I'll finish the Worsties, and then I'll cure cancer, and then...man, I need a vacation.