poster boy (pos'-tuhr boi) noun. A player who gets posterized, be it once, throughout a game, or repeatedly over the course of his entire career (see The Collected Works of Gregory Donovan Ostertag).

Usage example: Kyle Korver recently became the poster boy of the year.

Word trivia: Kyle Korver isn't just a career 40 percent three-point marksman and the sine qua non of Utah's recent upward sweep; he's also 100 percent Grade A beefcake. I'm completely serious. Go do a Google image search for "Kyle Korver" and you'll find him hangin' with the ladies, sandwiched between the glandularly challenged, kickin' it old school, wishing you a Happy Valentine's Day, posing in front of a tropical backdrop with some dude, being all angsty, breakin' hearts, rockin' the golf shorts, receiving a foot massage, flexing, getting an extreme makeover, learning that reading is FUN-damental, auditioning for Mr. Mom 2: Mommier Than Ever, attending a wedding, expressing the trophy love, bein' a homeboy, signing autographs, and scaring the absolute living piss out of Chris Farley's brother. All in all, Kyle might be the most posteriffic dude in NBA history.

Basketbawful's most favoritest poster boys: Because it never, ever gets old.

1. Greg Ostertag. God, we miss you Greg. We really do.


2. Shawn Bradley: They called him "The NBA Bitch" for a reason. Many reasons, actually.


3. Michael Olowokandi: How's that ball taste, Kandi Man?


4. Alonzo Mourning: There's just something sweet about watching a defensive menace getting posterized. Sorry, 'Zo.


5. Dikembe Mutombo: Kids, this is what happens when you finger wag people.

Labels: Alonzo Mourning, Dikembe Mutombo, Greg Ostertag, Kyle Korver, Michael Olowokandi, shawn bradley, Word of the Day

Shawn Bradley has now been retired for a year or two, and the thrill of being dunked on by every starter in the league taller than six-feet-seven is now a distant memory. He's a little bored. Which is why he is now a guidance counselor at a school in Salt Lake City! I won't even point out the irony in someone who has been schooled as often as Shawn Bradley is now teaching school. I guess I kinda did. Does anyone smell a sitcom?

No big hoopla or fanfare here. The Mormon Mantis approached the school administrator about employment much like how a 16-year old approaches the shift manager at Wendy's.

"I was talking to (the director) and said, 'I could use a job,' " Bradley said. "He said, 'Well, we could put you to work here.' "

"You're retired now. You need something to do. Why don't you come work with us?"

The executive director immediately noted the advantage of having such a frightening human around juvenile delinquents...

"Shawn has a great presence - due to his size - and has immediate credibility with the kids..everybody around here is still in awe at how tall Shawn is..."

A winning combination of rapport, freakish height and minor celebritydom has already made the Stormin' Mormon's teaching stint an unparalleled success. It's nice to see people finally looking forward to seeing Shawn Bradley.

Labels: school, shawn bradley, teacher