bosh vs cardinal

The wussification of the league: Chris Bosh is apparently trying to inspire his team to make a (don't laugh) playoff run (okay go ahead and laugh) by getting all rough and tumble. Said Bosh: "We have to realize nice guys sit at home and watch the playoffs. That's just how I feel. Maybe I'm wrong, but if you play with more intensity you're more likely to win and you're more likely to play better basketball." To further enhance his new tough guy persona, Bosh got all up in the face of...Brian Cardinal. Oooooo.

Explained Bosh: "I don't accept people yelling in my face. I don't do that to other people so I expect the same thing in return. I'm going to turn it up and, if guys do that, I hope they're ready to handle where it's going to go." And where's it going to go, Chris? I mean, really. You're going to, what, throw down with Brian Cardinal for yelling at you? I kinda doubt it.

While Chris was hyping a potential "Bosh versus Cardinal" fight Muhammad Ali-style, Brian was all, like, whatever. "I don't think I poked the bear. It's just two guys trying to get their teams a win, trying to survive. Little old me out there, he's much taller than me (6-foot-10 to Cardinal's 6-foot-8). That's the only way I can survive is be out there scrapping and playing hard. That's all that was. And then he (started) making his shots. God love him, he played well."

T-Wolves coach Kevin McHale, who I'm compelled to mention once clotheslined Kurt Rambis during the NBA Finals and was only called for a regular personal foul, sounded semi-disgusted that Bosh's panties getting a little bunched up was even noteworthy. Said McHale: In our league if two guys aren't kissing it's an altercation. There's no altercations anymore. Go back 30 years and you'll see some altercations."

The Associated Press: Check out what the AP had to say about the Grizzlies-Crabs game: "Playing short-handed is nothing new for the Cleveland Cavaliers. With starting shooting guard Delonte West inactive two days after returning from the right wrist fracture that sidelined him for 16 games, the Cavaliers relied on a team effort to beat the Memphis Grizzlies, 94-79 on Tuesday night." Were they being serious? Did they honestly think that the loss of Delonte West was going to make a difference in this one? The Griz are 15-41 overall have the second-worst road record in the league (3-22). Meanwhile, the Craboliers are 26-1 at home and have this guy named LeBron James. Maybe you've heard of him? I understand they need to find a storyline for every game, but some on. That's a real stretch.

The Detroit Pistons: Their 12-point defeat in Miami was their seventh straight not-win. And in case you're not an amateur NBA historian, this is the first time they've dropped seven in a row since December 28, 2001. And if they don't beat the Hornets in New Orleans tonight, they'll match their longest fail-streak since 1995.

The whole mess has left the Not-Answer talkin' 'bout DEFENSE, man. "Our whole thing is not on the offensive end. We can't stop anybody. The way we're playing we have to shoot 60 percent to win a basketball game. Everybody's always going to look at the offensive end and scoring points. We scored enough points to win the basketball game. But we just can't get stops consistently. We can't get stops when we need them." For the record, A.I. is currently giving up 108 points per 100 possessions. That's three points worse than his career average. I'm just sayin'.

Random note: Did anybody else find it interesting that one game after scoring a career-high 50 points, D-Wade had a career-best 16 assists?

The Orlando Magic: When you're trying to catch the Kevin Garnett-less Celtics in the race for the second seed in the Eastern Conference, you probably shouldn't get thwacked by 18 points against teams hovering outside of the playoff bubble. But that's what happened to the Magic last night against the Bulls. And their rather defenseless loss -- Chicago shot over 56 percent for the game -- is best summed up by the following play:

Raged Magic coach Stan Van Gundy: "Our starting lineup brought nothing to the game. I'm embarrassed and disgusted by what I saw. I don't know if our players are, but they should be. Our guys want to talk about being a contending team. We're still not tough enough and we don't play hard enough" Van Gundy then ate a live kitten, despite its frantic and persistent mewing.

The Dallas Mavericks: Normally, the Mavs getting kicked around by the Spurs in San Antonio wouldn't be that big of a deal. But the "Spurs" were playing without Tim Duncan (sore right knee) and Manu Ginobili (flop practice). Dallas should have won this one, or at least been competitive. But they were not. Tony Parker (37 points, 12 assists) absolutely destroyed Jason Kidd (2 points, 4 assists) -- remember when the Spurs almost traded Parker to get Kidd? -- and Kurt Thomas (10 points, 15 boards) almost outrebounded the Mavs' starting frontcourt (Erick Dampier, Dirk Nowitzki and Josh Howard) by himself. Dallas shot 34 percent and had only 10 assists (compared to 12 turnovers). Truly bawful. Said Mavericks coach Rick Carlisle: "I can only shudder to think what would happen had (Duncan and Ginobili) played."

Tracy McGrady: The Rockets have won eight straight at home and five straight overall. Both streaks are season-highs. It''s like they don't even miss him.

Bobcats-Suns: From Basketbawful reader DKH:

A few revenge games: Diaw: 10 of 12 for 27 points to go with 10 rebounds and 6 assists. Bell: 9 of 14 for 23 points, 3 rebounds, 3 assists. J-Rich: started slow but had 20 points on 10 FGA to go with 3 rebounds and 3 assists. But, he fouled out. Still pretty efficient. Doesn't really quality as a "revenge game", but Dudley had 2 point, 4 boards, an assist, and 2 steals.

WoTN nomination to Emeka Okafor. I'm not sure he ever passed the ball back out (0 assists); he spent the whole game in foul trouble and was pretty much schooled by Shaq.

I also wanted to nominate Terry Porter for a developing "worst of" situation: Goran Dragic has improved rapidly since Gentry took over. He is playing with much more confidence, shoots the ball more, doesn't dribble into as many worthless situations. Gentry is treating him differently than Porter did, and it seems to be helping him develop.

On the other hand, SSOL is to the NBA what the spread offense is to college football. It lets mediocre players put up stellar numbers. However, Dragic is a rookie, and now we'll get to see how he develops.

Additionally, the broadcasters commented early on that Bell and Diaw were happier in Charlotte. Which shouldn't be true, considering Charlotte is 10 games worse than Phoenix. So, I'm not sure what Porter was doing, but the amount of player discontent would be incredibly disturbing to me, and if I were a general manager looking for a head coach, I would steer clear of Porter.
Lacktion report: Take it away, Chris...

Grizzlies-Cavs: With this game pretty much decided at the opening tipoff, Adonal Foyle - who the Warriors chose 8th overall in the 1997 draft - walked on the court for Memphis and delivered a 1:0 Madsen-level Voskuhl via foul-and-nothing-else in 2:59, also good enough for a +1. The crustacean clique has seen a major personnel shift as of late, with Tarence Kinsey having to say goodbye to his life as a lacktator these days, coming out of his shell to be a starter tonight. Confused by his All-Lacktion teammate's transition, Darnell Jackson also provided contributory basketball, forcing King Crab and Mike Brown to crown Trey Johnson as the royal landfill crawler. Johnson skillfully managed garbage time by clenching out a +1 in 1:33 via foul.

Pistons-Heat: In 1:41, Detroit's Amir Johnson merely milled two fouls for a +2. Joel Anthony for Miami continues his consistency in creating lacktivity with a one-foul +1 in 3:22, which also counted for a Madsen-level Voskul of 1:0.

Lakers-Thunder: Clay Bennett believes that greed is good. So he must be relieved that the Tyson Chandler trade didn't go through, as the focal point of the deal - an aging Joe Smith, another mid-90s Warriors first-rounder -- pilfered a freshly shrinkwrapped copy of WiiFit off the shelves tonight with a 14-second Mario! (Interestingly, like Dikembe Mutombo's Mario from a few weeks ago, ESPN disagrees and claims on its box score that this never happened! Bias against elderly lacktators from the Worldwide Leader?!)

Mavs-Spurs: Devean George and Matt Carroll have kept Dallas in the lacktion reports the same way Mark Cuban keeps his big ego in front of the cameras over the years, and this game at AT&T Center was no exception. George probably has a good view of the Alamo by now, due to two bricks coming from downtown; couple that with two fouls and that produces +4 in 10:08. Carroll's statline made him look like a Mini-Me compared to Devean, with half-sized numbers -- 5:12 on the floor, with one foul and one missed shot each for +2. Teammate Erick Dampier downright delivered as well by managing a slight 4:3 Voskuhl in 8:59 (one foul and three turnovers against one rebound and made field goal each), more impressive considering Dampier's role as a starter!
Kobe Bryant: Mamba handed Adam Morrison a huge laundry bag full of dirty jock straps along with instructions to wash them by hand. Adam dutifully complied, but when he tried to return them, Kobe said: "Huh? You can do whatever with 'em. I don't even know who they belong to."

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Blogger Unknown said...
Dont know if you saw, but Yao Ming missed back to back dunks on the same possession. Hopefully someone has the video because it is extremely 'bawful.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Im watching some Sportscenter and it just showed the Blazers/Rockets game. Did I just see Yao miss a dunk, get the ball back on the same play and miss a point blank layup?!?!?

It must suck being almost 8 feet tall and struggling to put the ball in the basket.

Blogger chris said...
Wasn't Alston supposed to be the deadline deal that pushed the Magic over the top? All I can say is, it's really bad when you let Scrappy Doo rob you of the rock, given all I thought he was capable of stealing was the joy kids used to have when the cast only included Scooby, Shaggy, Velma, Daphne, and Freddie.

As for those ex-Suns in North assumption is that they're "happy" the way Marion was when he originally went to the Heat. Woops!

Blogger Cortez said...
"It''s like they don't even miss him [McGrady]...."

They don't.

Knee-Mac = Whipped cream and cotton balls.

Blogger chris said...
Cortez: There's gotta be a term to describe talented players whose absences make a team significantly better, you know, like Knee-Mac's or Elton Brand's. It's not just a "Ewing Theory" deal in which the team simply is just playing harder when the player in question is not present, but more like actively crimping his teammates' style.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
Over on ESPN they note that with last night's loss Detroit is now below .500 for the first time since Nov. 15, 2006; but I'm really curious to know how long it's been since Detroit was below .500 beyond the first couple weeks of the season (after all, Cleveland and San Antonio were below .500 earlier this season). I wonder if Detroit's been below .500 after say, Dec. 1st, since Grant Hill left them?

Blogger chris said...
Wild Yams: I think 2000-01 was the last time the Pistons were under .500 (both late in the season and in the final standings)...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Thanks for the quote basketbawful.

Chris: What you say about the ex-Suns might be true, but it really is remarkable to watch the Suns the past few games after watching them the first half of the season. Bell, in particular, was terrible in the first half. I haven't seen him much since he left, but Charlotte used him pretty well last night.

On Okafor: the broadcasters commented at one point (after a particularly futile possession) that "he needs to go to big man camp this summer." Things must be bad when you're so bumbling the broadcasters call you out.

Blogger David Menéndez said...
Gary Payton at the 3:11 mark - that's the kind of eloquence we need on TV.

Regarding the Rockets, I think none of us were surprised that the Rockets started clicking with T-Mac gone. He was shooting at a career low percentage, and his numbers were down across the board. Truth is, the Rockets have a well-built, deep team, and it's a pity that they made such a mistake when they signed T-Mac. It's one bad call among many great ones.

There's a pretty interesting articles I found via 48 Minutes of Hell ( about how the Rockets FO uses advanced stats to select their players, and they in fact focus on Shane Battier. It's definitely worth reading. Here's the link:

They claim Battier is one of the best Kobe-stoppers. I wonder if Kobe knows of this article... should be interesting to keep an eye on them the next time Houston and LA meet.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
WoTN nomination to Emeka Okafor. I'm not sure he ever passed the ball back out (0 assists); he spent the whole game in foul trouble and was pretty much schooled by Shaq.

I was wondering who I would nominate to be the "almighty sarlacc", (it's even spelled right this time, you ueber-nerds and spelling nazis out there!) and now I have one! Emeka Okefor IS the sarlacc pit. Can we just call him Sarlacc Okefor from now on?

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Well, atleast today, Toronto has a 6.9% chance to make the playoffs according to John Hollinger. And there a whooping 5 teams that could concievably finish the season without winning another game.

Try not to read the first sentence of that page. Hollinger's Fried Chicken is based off Hollinger's Secret Spice, designed by Hollinger Chicken Co.'s John Hollinger.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Stephon Marbury should now be known as Steph Infection.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
ok can I nominate the video game 76ers in the first quarter of my NBA live 2004 game? (yeah i know its old... oh well!)The score... 41-2!!!! This was with 8 minute quarters. My stats: 18-19 shooting with 3/3 three pointers. Their stats: 1/17! and 0/7 from three. Iverson only had 3 shots with 2 missed 3s. They also missed 2 free throws (by a guard with a decent rating of 74!)that seriously had me in tears cause i thought i would have a scoreless quarter. They finally got the 2 points with 1:30 left on a dunk after i had blocked it twice. This was on hardest difficulty btw. Just some pretty epic fail lol.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Leo Amundsen is intrigued by Kevin Mchale's quote on kissing and altercations.

Blogger Unknown said...
Kobe didn't have to do that. The guy cried like Sally Struthers at center court on national TV and he was drafted by Michael Jordan, so you know he was called a faggot quite frequently. He really doesn't need any more humiliation.

Blogger Dan said...
Chris: It's gotta involve Marbury in the name. He left the T-Wolves and they won 9 more games than they were on pace to win in the lockout-shortened season as his last as a T-Wolf. He left the Nets and they went from a .500 team to back-to-back finals appearances. He left the Suns and they went from a 29 win team to a 62 win team that got to the conference finals. He hasn't played for the Knicks and they've already won more games without him this season than they won last season. Getting rid of Starbury is one of the best things a team can do to improve its team the next season.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
This is why Miami Heat fans love Dwyane Wade. He had to play a lot of PG though which explains the Chris Paul like game

Anonymous Anonymous said...
when did "Smoove" become truly bawful? I can't believe I'm saying this, but now I kinda wish my Hawks hadn't matched Memphis' summer offer...

Blogger Cortez said...
"It's not just a "Ewing Theory" deal in which the team simply is just playing harder when the player in question is not present, but more like actively crimping his teammates' style."

McGrady is a special case.

He is, without a doubt, a highly skilled player with great athletic ability (sans knee injury).

But if that's all it took to be a "winner" then every contest in every sport would be a classic battle.

Understandably, McGrady's teammates get caught up in the classic trap of hoping the "most talented" player lives up to his potential, not only in the 17th game of the season against the 24th ranked team but also in the big moment games where it's win or go home. He simply hasn't demonstrated he has that mindset. least he's rich. Gotta tip my hat to him on that one!

Anonymous Anonymous said...
when i was randomly reading a post from almost 3 years ago(because i love this blog too much), i found this. "If you can make that assertion based on his 28 ppg over the last 3 years, fine. But is this a list of "greatest players ever" or "greatest players right now"? In 5 years, when the Lakers return to the playoffs, or Kobe is on the all-time scoring list, or has an MVP award under his belt, (or at least hasn't went down the path of Penny Hardaway) let's talk."
isn't that somehow a reversed stat curse?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Hey man, don't talk trash about AI. He's playing like an All-Star!! He was is the all-start game, right?

Blogger chris said...
Dan: Even the New York Times has pointed out the positive karma a team gets by letting go of Starbury: