The reactions of the 6 people closest to the camera, from closest to furthest:
"OH!"
"OH!"
"OH!"
"OH!"
"Dude, that Laker girl is totally hot"
"Ooooh... Jumbotron..."
Speaking of Rajon Rondo, here's a little basketbawesome for you to read: Pat Forde -- formerly of my local Louisville Courier Journal newspaper -- breaks down Rajon Rondo's past and present with an excellent nine-page article.

Update! A late addition of footbawful too amazing to ignore: maple bars from gourmet doughnut shops are irresistable. Seriously, I would laugh and move on if this article was on The Onion or Sportspickle, but it's from the Associated Press. Unreal.

Yahoo! Sports' Johnny Ludden devoted an entire article to Ron-Ron's horrific possession in Game 2. Worth a read.

Desperate to remain relevant in The Summer of LeBron, the Miami Heat have unveiled their master plan to keep Dwyane Wade: a freaking billboard.

Hoping to re-sign Dwyane Wade when he enters free agency next month, the Heat has already extended the star guard a contract offer -- for all of South Florida to see.

The Heat took its "We Want Wade" recruiting campaign to new heights Monday when the team unveiled a billboard designed as a contract near Wade's neighborhood.

(And hey, speaking of contracts, check back in tomorrow afternoon for something so bawful it requires its own post)

One last non-basketball tidbit: According to an article posted by CNN, you can watch Darth Vader in Star Wars to learn more about mental illness. Additionally, you can watch Jar-Jar Binks to learn more about being a worthless sack of dog excrement that incites levels of hatred that cannot be equaled even by the Dark Side of the Force.

Worst of Game 2 in Pictures:

CAPTION THIS!
What's Pau Gasol pointing at?

For some reason, Sheed and Terrell Owens hamming it up does not surprise me at all

If you can come up with any caption that makes this funnier than just the picture itself, you win... well, we can't give you anything, but we all win simply because this picture exists

Kobe is about to go all Pac-Man on Tony Allen's fingers

So, Andy Garcia, when's the Colonel Sanders bio-pic coming out?

"Damn Sheed, where the hell were you all season?"

Sad mustache is sad :(
NBA Finals - Game 3:
Lakers at Celtics - ABC, 9:00pm (Unless you're Evil Ted camping in the middle of absolute nowhere, then just pretend it isn't on TV)
Series tied at 1-1

Before we get to this preview, let's take a quick detour for a little nostalgia. See, it's impossible for me to see or hear "Lakers vs. Celtics" without immediately thinking about their duels in the 1980s. Likewise, it's impossible for me not to think about the old basketball video game Lakers vs. Celtics and the NBA Playoffs". I got it for Christmas when my parents got me a Sega Genesis, but my dad played it much more than I did. I was too busy playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 and Mortal Kombat since those were the hot new games when I finally got my console. That being said, it was a totally awesome game, as you can see below:

Tom Chambers - UNSTOPPABLE BASKETBALL MACHINE
(Technically the game didn't even come out until the 80s were over, but since I was either in diapers or in kindergarten the vast majority of the time prior to 1990, just bear with me here for a minute.)

Now, things are a little different today. (NBA 2K10 has slightly more realism than this game, for example) However, we still have three constants that held true from that timeframe to today:
1) Lakers vs. Celtics is a huge moneymaker for the NBA
2) 2D Sonic the Hedgehog games kick ass while 3D Sonic games are highly prone to sucking
3) Referees will make questionable calls and fans will complain about it

Beyond that, I don't know how the rest of this series will play out, including this game. All I know is that defense will create offense (especially for the Celtics), and my knees are in better shape than KG's. And I can probably provide more effective minutes on a basketball court than Shelden Williams did in Game 2, which is the lowest blow I can possibly dish out.

Labels: Bawful After Dark, Boston Celtics, Los Angeles Lakers, nostalgia, Rajon Rondo

The Leastern Conference playoff battle
It seems like just yesterday that the regular season kicked off and I still was naive enough to think the Celtics might be legitimate contenders. Ah, memories...

And yet, here we are, just days away from the end of another regular season. While we will get to see some hopefully entertaining basketball in the playoffs, we will have to bid adieu to teams such as the Clippers, Timberwolves, Kings, and Bullets for many long months. Oh, darn.

I have good news for Antoine Walker and Latrell Sprewell -- they've got a new buddy to hang out with in the former-NBA-player-poorhouse! Derrick Coleman is $5 million in debt. As noted by the brilliant NotMikeDunleavy, "Derrick Coleman is bankrupt? Unbelievable! He was so responsible in every other aspect of his life." He also wondered: "Who was better at handling money: Derrick Coleman or Derrick Coleman's NBA Jam character?"

I dunno. This is a total shock to me. You can't tell me buying a fur coat five fur coats isn't a great investment!

(You really didn't think I could say that with a straight face, did you? Yeah, you're right. I couldn't. But I tried, so give me credit for that much. That's better than half the NBA teams can say about the past week.)

Now, with that out of the way, let's move on so I can get out of here and go to the golf course. I need to get a head start since nearly half of the league will be doing it in just a couple days. The NHL already ended its regular season, so it's probably getting harder to get a good tee time.

Worst of the Weekend in Pictures:

Free T-Shirt Excitement
Second only to Free Taco Excitement

"Oh my God! That ball is going to fall on my head!!"

Either Kendrick Perkins is being held down, or he is constipated. Or both.

"I can't believe I just let the Clippers beat us..."

Yes, you just lost to the Bullets. Feel shame.

When not getting in epic fights over bad coupons, this guy likes to play with rubber chickens at Pacers games
Nationally Televised Games:
Craptors at Pistons: A riveting battle of Eastern conference powerhouses. (Okay, I apologize. Sarcasm is fun, but that was just too over the top)

Mavericks at Clippers: ...Because of course when the schedule makers decided to throw this one on national TV, they thought "Hey, I bet the Clippers will be battling for a playoff spot!!"

All The Other Games:
Magic at Pacers: The Pacers have averaged almost 109ppg in the past dozen games, and 119ppg over the last four. Someone really should tell the Pacers that the preseason doesn't last all the way into March.

Heat at 76ers: The Sixers are about to play their last home game of the season. This is good considering they've won more games on the road than at home this year.

Bobcats at Nyets: Since I have nothing of interest to say about this game, go laugh at this terrible jersey.

Wizards Generals Bullets at Bricks: The more I look at the Bullets' depth chart, the more I wonder how David Stern hasn't intervened. You know how much he hates for his league (and, by proxy, David Stern) to be embarrassed, and any team that trots out Livingston, Young, Miller, Blatche, and Oberto for a starting five is a damn embarrassment.

Hawks at Bucks: A potential playoff preview and a battle for seeding. This game might actually not suck!

Timberwolves at Spurs: Oh, what the hell. Here's another horrifically bad jersey. (The comments are almost as funny as the picture itself)

Grizzlies at Nuggets: OJ Mayo's hurt, so he may be replaced by Marcus Williams. Yes, I just linked to his old Nets jersey a couple lines ago. And yes, this is the most exposure he has ever had in his career.

Thunder at Frail Blazers: Both teams are playing for 50 wins and for playoff seeding. So, remind me again, why isn't this game on national TV, yet the Clippers are?

Rockets at Kings: Tyreke Evans is just 24 points shy of joining the rookie 20/5/5 club with Oscar, Michael, and LeBron. Too bad his team still can't win.

Labels: Bawful After Dark, Derrick Coleman, giant chicken, Indiana Pacers, nostalgia