UPDATES!: ATL, BOS, CHA, DAL, DEN, HOU, MEM, MIA, MIL, MIN, ORL, PHO, SAS, UTA, WAS, and all teams 2010-11 salaries double checked!


July 1st, 2010. It's 12:00 am.

Do you know where your free agents are?


Welcome to my breakdown of the much hyped NBA Free Agency 2010. Here I hope to provide a quick (actually, this is absurdly long) snapshot of each team's current situation and outlook, so that you can survive this dreadful week of non-trading activity. *rolls eyes into back of head as far as possible* Really though, have you tried to visit NBA.com, ESPN.com, or anything NBA media related recently? I've seen Linda Blair vomit less than the amount of LeBron and free agency bullshit spewed by the media these past few days. So thus, I've taken it upon myself to capture all you need to know to properly enjoy this next week in true BasketBawful spirit.

For comedy's sake, I'm going to ask that we avoid the really crappy wishful thinking type trades and scenarios. Yes, I understand that you could trade Rashard Lewis for LeBron. Yes, I understand that Bynum and Vujacic could be in a sign and trade for Bosh, and then every championship-piggyback veteran could sign with the Lakers. Yes, I understand that you could trade Kirk Hinrich to the Wizards even though they have a poison situation and already have 2 PGs. (Wait, you mean that last one actually is gonna happen?) Anyways, I hope to have the most updated figures, numbers, and rosters by the time of this post, so if you spot any errors or as updates come along, or you just feel like sharing with me your stupid idea of how your team will get LeBron so we can all make fun of you, post a comment!

Other assumptions:
  • Going with the flat $56.1 million cap for next season.
  • This means for new contracts where the 105% rule doesn't apply, we'll use the minimum salary table here, and the maximum contract will be assumed as follows:
    0-6 years of experience: $14,025,000
    7-9 years: $16,830,000
    10+ years: $19,635,000
  • No team is so completely stupid as to talk about their first round draft pick's salary, so we will use the 100% number.
  • Assume all teams in the FA hunt will sign minimum salary contracts after July 8th.
  • We're using face value or near value ideas. No assuming what some guy wants, like Shaq taking the vet minimum somewhere for the Lakers some stacked super team. Unless you have a personal relationship with said player, and his family, and have personally spoken to him about his exact intentions, personally, and how he's okay with leaving tens of millions on the table for the chance at a ring. Then by all means, please share.
  • Crappy players will take their player options. Anyone that has the remote chance at an extension or making more money by becoming a FA (especially considering the end of this CBA) we will assume will not take their player options. Unless we're pretty sure that a team wants to screw a guy into staying on their team, or their qualifying offer/team option happens to be near equal to what they'd make anyways, we're not assuming either is picked up.
  • Think about sign and trades, and if we're going to talk about them, find an incentive for ALL PARTIES (both teams and the players being extended). Not everyone can make deals with Chris Wallace. Otherwise, lets assume re-signings and free agency.
  • Ugh, for the last time, LeBron's not coming to your team, stop bothering everyone about it.
Important resources:The Spreadsheet:
Everything that follows will be a summary of what I've collected in this spreadsheet. (Google docs, no login required, click it now.) First, I've collected and compiled important information from the draft with respect to salaries. This was, as I mentioned earlier, unnecessarily difficult to do, and there's bound to be errors. If you see any errors, let me know.

Second, I've collected a list of free agents who are eligible for max contracts above (in red) or near their respective cap percentage.

List of players who are eligible for greater than max contracts:
Jermaine O'Neal $24,166,800
Tracy McGrady $23,607,280
Shaquille O'Neal $22,050,000
Dirk Nowitzki $20,785,500
Paul Pierce $20,785,498
Ray Allen $19,715,703
Amare Stoudemire $17,197,241
Yao Ming $17,197,241

Finally, there's a tab for every team, where I've copied hoopdata's page, updated the numbers with the latest trades and draft, and complied some cap room scenarios. Since I made lots of notes and formulas such that it's near impossible for anyone else to read what I've done, let's begin with the teams. Oh, also, I use the term "albatross" for long guaranteed contract that you may want to get out of, and the term "S&T bait" for a 2011 expiring that may be used to help leverage this summer's free agency.

Atlanta Hawks:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $6,180,374
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap holding onto Joe Johnson: ($21,656,885)
Notable Free Agents: Joe Johnson [$14,976,754, no player option]
Albatross: See below.
S&T bait: Jamal Crawford [$10,080,000]
Summary: The Hawks have some sign and trade bait with 2011 expirings, or could try to sign and trade Joe Johnson, but it's probably too late for that. Too many albatross contracts with Josh Smith, Marvin Williams, and Zaza through 2013 and Bibby through 2012. Maybe shoot for J.J. Redick? Or hope for the Mayan apocalypse?
Final Verdict: A good hope-crusher for Minnesota fans to show the long lasting effects of what happens when you keep drafting players that play the same position.

Boston Celtics:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($11,098,826)
Maximum Cap Space if Paul Pierce opts out and Rasheed Wallace retires and Ray Allen isn't re-signed: $15,789,807
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap Space with Paul Pierce cap hold: ($4,522,087)
Albatross: Kevin Garnett [$18,832,044, through 2012]
S&T bait: Kendrick Perkins [$4,890,208], Glen Davis [$3,000,004]
Summary: To blow up or not to blow up. This team could go lots of ways, even down to asking KG to take a pay cut. Too many stupid rumors, only time will tell what their plan is (if any).
Final Verdict: Bleh.

Charlotte Bobcats:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($4,448,542)
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap Space with Tyrus Thomas qualifying offer: ($17,999,938)
Notable Free Agents UPDATED: Raymond Felton [$5,501,196]
Albatross: The entire team.
S&T bait UPDATE: Tyson Chandler [$12,600,000], Nazr Mohammed [$6,883,800]
Summary: No draft pick, locked down guaranteed salaries, and an owner with a Hitler mustache. Hey, at least the defense is good, right? It might be worth it to give up big and try to unload some salary. If you need a reason to blame, I'd suggest Smithfield Foods and what they've done to the state of North Carolina.
Final Verdict: Yea, y'all are fucked.

Chicago Bulls:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $20,578,404
Maximum Cap Space if that completely stupid trade to Washington is true: $29,933,796
Notable Free Agents: Brad Miller?
Albatross: Luol "king-o-albatross" Deng [$11,345,000, through 2014]
S&T bait: None.
Summary: The Bulls are definitely in FA search mode, as they don't really have the assets to pull off a sign and trade deal. Let's also assume no one's picking up Luol Deng's crappy crap. Yet somehow Washington is absorbing over $9M in cap for Chicago. Something just doesn't add up.
Final Verdict: It's looking tough to clear the room for 2 maxes, but a strong team can be built here.

Cleveland Cavaliers:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $9,472,590
Notable Free Agents: That one dude [$15,779,912, player option] and that old fat guy [$21,000,000]
Albatross: Antawn Jamison [$13,358,905, through 2012]
S&T bait: Some, but is obviously on the giving end of a S&T if one were to happen
Summary: Screw this,
Final Verdict: Y'all are fucked.

Dallas Mavericks:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space UPDATE: ($17,812,046)
Maximum Cap Space if Dirk opts out, Najera and Barea lowballed a.k.a. "The Mavs are fucked" case: $2,499,850
Notable Free Agents: Dirk Nowitzki [$19,795,714, player option]
Albatross: Shawn Marion [$7,305,500, through 2013]
S&T bait: Caron Butler [$10,561,960], Jason Terry? [$9,873,000]
Summary: Wow, Dirk can really screw over the Mavs, can't he?
Final Verdict: Is Cuban good at pulling off sign and trades?

Denver Nuggets:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($19,593,497)
Notable Free Agents UPDATE: Kenyon Martin? Nope.
Albatross: Everything.
S&T bait UPDATE: J.R. Smith [$6,694,851], Kenyon Martin [$16,795,454], disgruntled Melo and crappy front office bargaining.
Summary: Looking bleak. Everyone's locked down this year, and I don't see Kenyon Martin earning a max contract. No draft picks, no real assets to trade, Carmelo likely leaving, and Birdman through 2014. Update: Or, the front office is threatening to trade Melo if he doesn't extend. Ya, okay.
Final Verdict: So fucked.

Detroit Pistons:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($2,572,216)
Notable Free Agents: KWAME BROWN BITCHES [$4,000,000]
Albatross: Detroit fans probably shouldn't look at their team's future salary chart...
S&T bait UPDATE: Tayshaun Prince [$11,147,760, no player option], Chris Wilcox [$3,000,000]
Summary: Still in the early years of the "how to blow your cap space by severely over-paying" era. But look on the bright side; only $9,000,000 of Rip Hamilton's contract in 2012-13 is guaranteed.
Final Verdict: What's the suicide rate in Detroit again?

Golden State Warriors:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space UPDATE: ($1,085,353)
Notable Free Agents: Uhh...
Albatross: Monta "McTurnover" Ellis [$11,000,000, through 2014]
S&T bait: Bleh.
Summary: Welcome to the Udoh era.
Final Verdict: Not much to do this summer.

Houston Rockets:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space UPDATE: ($16,080,834)
Notable Free Agents: not Yao [apparently picking up $17,686,100 player option]
Albatross: Kevin Martin [$10,600,005, through 2013], Trevor Ariza [$6,322,320, through 2013/14]
S&T bait: A lot.
Summary: Assuming Jared Jeffries picks up his $6,883,800 option, you've got Shane Battier's $7,429,500, Jordan Hill's $2,669,520, David Andersen's $2,500,000, not trading Aaron Brooks, etc., the Rockets have a lot of indirect options this off-season. They can afford to take on a mini albatross with a top tier free agent in a sign and trade, but it's gonna be work to get it done.
Final Verdict: Needs some more Morey Magic.

Indiana Pacers:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($10,547,446)
Notable Free Agents: Uhm...
Albatross: Uhm...
S&T bait: A lot.
Summary: The Pacers have cleared the decks for the 2011-12 season, with Danny Granger locked in through 2014. Maybe this is a brilliant move by Bird to not get screwed by the new 2011 CBA, or maybe there's a bunch of trades incoming. In any case, the 2010-11 roster looks just like last season's roster, only somehow worse.
Final Verdict: Lookin' pretty screwed.

Los Angeles Clippers:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $17,210,816
Notable Free Agents: Bleh.
Albatross: Baron Davis [$13,000,000, through 2012], Chris Kaman [$11,300,000, through 2012]
S&T bait: None really.
Summary: Lacking the assets, the Clippers are going for the homerun swing here this summer. I guess if there's some max contract FA that feels like getting treated like shit and then somehow getting injured, his 4 other teammates will welcome him with warm arms.
Final Verdict: Uh, it's the Clippers.

The Supreme Ultimate Los Angeles World Champions of the Universe Lakers:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($29,530,299)
Notable Free Agents: Adam Morrison [$5,257,229], Derek Fisher [$5,048,000], Jordan Farmar [$1,947,200]
Albatross: Kobe Bryant [$24,806,250 $25,244,493 $27,849,149 $30,453,805], Pau Gasol [$17,823,000 $18,714,150 $19,000,000 $19,285,850], Ron Artest [$6,322,320 $6,790,640 $7,258,960], Lamar Odom [$8,200,000 $8,900,000], Andrew Bynum [$13,700,000 $14,900,000]
S&T bait: Sasha Vujacic [$5,475,113]
Summary: Pour some milk into that bowl of championship rings as part of your balanced breakfast. What kind do you prefer? I always enjoyed 1%, a balance of taste and health.
Final Verdict: Fuck this shit.

Memphis Grizzlies:
Current Maximum Cap Space UPDATE: $6,549,212
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap Space with Rudy Gay qualifying offer: ($3,293,779)
Notable Free Agents: Rudy Gay [$3,280,997]
Albatross: Hasheem Thabeet [$4,793,280, through 2011]
S&T bait: A lot lot.
Summary: There is $0 guaranteed on the books for 2011-12! Another team preparing for the new CBA and lockout? Maybe they can spice things up by attempting to offer Gay the qualifying offer.
Final Verdict: See Indiana Pacers, minus franchise killing brawl.

Miami Heat:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $43,635,815
UPDATE Maximum Cap Space with Wade's hold: $27,952,027
UPDATE Maximum Cap Space with retarded Raptors S&T: $16,726,145 ($17,199,749 for LeBron)
Notable Free Agents: Jermaine O'Neal [$23,016,000], Summit Member #1 [$15,779,912]
Albatross: Michael "oh how the great have fallen" Beasley [$4,962,240, through 2011]
S&T bait: Don't you need people on your team in order to have bait?
Summary: It seems the Heat are giving up their triple max contract plan, as the Mario Chalmers team option was just picked up. They can offer $15,018,876 to three FAs though, or $15,156,048 if Joel Anthony decides to be a nice guy as reported, so if that summit crap was actually true, this is the number they'd be looking at.
UPDATE: The Heat are really waiting for that final cap space number, as any small change will affect if they can give 3 max contracts. You know, assuming this completely fucking stupid S&T with Toronto doesn't happen.
Final Verdict: Keep mentioning the reduced taxes and nightlife!

Milwaukee Bucks:
Current Maximum Cap Space UPDATE: $1,402,899 $7,382,671 (Salmons didn't take option lol)
Notable Free Agents: John Salmons, apparently
Albatross: Bad Porn [$9,600,000, through 2013]
S&T bait UPDATE: Michael Redd's picked up option [$18,300,000]
Summary: No idea. UPDATE: Still no idea.
Final Verdict: A strange combination of team options, weird contracts, and pretty much being stuck this off-season. Stuck still with a bad team.

Minnesota Timberwolves:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $13,235,591
Notable Free Agents: Darko [$7,540,000]
Albatross: Al Jefferson [$13,000,000, through 2013]
S&T bait: Some, not really though.
Summary: T'wolves have basically given up on the max FA chase. Unless Kahn pulls something amazing *snicker*. How sad is it that re-signing Darko actually becomes an urgent priority? UPDATE: Looking deeper at Rudy Gay's qualifying offer, I've added a line for his proposed salary [$13,709,195]. But otherwise yea, this team still sucks.
Final Verdict: Can you even make paella in Minnesota?

New Jersey Nets:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $29,989,807
Notable Free Agents: Barf.
Albatross: Devin Harris [$8,981,000, through 2013]
S&T bait: Terrence Williams [$2,214,480], Courtey Lee [$1,352,640], Quinton Ross? [$1,146,337 player option]
Summary: The Nets need a few more minor cuts to make the double FA signing work. Getting rid of Yi was a surprisingly good start. Will hanging Kris Humphries by his feet over a gold mine help read the goal?
Final Verdict: Comrade, trust the motherland! and Jay-Z!

New Orleans Hornets:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($11,913,649)
Notable Free Agents: ....
Albatross: Emeka Okafor [$11,795,000, through 2013/14]
S&T bait: Maybe?
Summary: This is pretty depressing to analyze.
Final Verdict: So fucked. Does Chris Paul feel worse than a slowly dying burning oily sea turtle?

New York Knicks:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $34,528,263
Notable Free Agents: Tracy McGrady [$22,483,124], David Lee [$7,000,00]
Albatross: Eddy Curry [$11,276,863, 2011]
S&T bait: Not much, really.
Summary: This one mistake, Eddy Curry, has pretty much kept NY out of the picture for LeBron. At least the Knicks are the only team in the clear for double max salaries!
Final Verdict: Hello, Boozer and Joe Johnson!

Oklahoma City Thunder:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $6,898,156
Notable Free Agents: None.
Albatross: None.
S&T bait: Tons.
Summary: So the plans to steal Sam Presti and make him GM of the Suns is underwa-...oh, ahem. Anyways, even look at those trades FOR Daequan Cook and Morris Peterson, both expiring in 2011. Could Indiana, Memphis, and Oklahoma City be onto something here?
Final Verdict: Wow, just look at this team build year after year.

Orlando Magic:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($27,200,430)
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap Space with J.J. Redick hold and Barnes opted out: ($34,118,654)
Notable Free Agents UPDATE: J.J. Redick's sweet touch [$2,839,408]
Albatross: Ahahaha.
S&T bait: No, in a bad way.
Summary: Man, next year is gonna hurt.
Final Verdict: As with the Detroit fans, Orlando fans may not want to gaze directly at the ORL salary chart. UPDATE: Like seriously, don't look.

Philadelphia 76ers :
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($10,735,638)
Notable Free Agents: Allen Iverson [$650,686]
Albatross: Aaaaahahahaha-
S&T bait: Sorta?
Summary: Even if players opt our from their options, the 76ers still would be stuck this off-season with their same crappy crew.
Final Verdict: Nothing's changed, pretty much screwed for the next 3 years.

Phoenix Suns:
Current Maximum Cap Space (assumes Amar'e opts out) UPDATE: $14,461,055 $11,221,055 (Grant Hill picked up option)
UPDATE Maximum non-Cap Space with Amar'e max hold: ($5,502,582)
Notable Free Agents: LOU!
Albatross: Not really
S&T bait: Yes.
Summary: Didn't think the Suns could pull off getting under the cap and come close to offering a max contract. UPDATE: Not close anymore, but for the love of God please let go of Amar''''''e's cap hold!
Final Verdict: Rebounding and defense, rebounding and defense...

Portland Trail Blazers:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space: ($11,862,668)
Notable Free Agents: None.
Albatross: Lamarcus Aldridge [$10,744,000, through 2015]
S&T bait: Andre Miller [$7,269,264], Joel Przybilla [$7,405,300 player option]
Summary: Maybe Kevin Pritchard did try to screw Portland on his way out, as his draft day trades ultimately put the Blazers about $7 million even more over the cap.
Final Verdict: *tears ACL*

Sacramento Kings:
Current Maximum Cap Space UPDATE: $15,366,159
Notable Free Agents: [This section is intentionally left blank]
Albatross: Beno Udrih [$6,478,600, through 2012/13], Francisco Garcia [$5,500,000, through 2013].
S&T bait UPDATE: Samuel Dalembert [$13,278,129], Carl Landry [$3,000,000]
Summary UPDATE: Lost about $3 million in cap space, probably not gonna find a good use for the cap space. Maybe fight Minnesota for Gay? (This is quite possibly the most favorite sentence I've ever written.)
Final Verdict: Who'd want to come to a team that gets screwed by the refs anyways?

San Antonio Spurs:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space UPDATE: ($13,802,086) $1,343,330
Notable Free Agents UPDATE: No. LOL RJ.
Albatross: Manu? Duncan?
S&T bait: Richard Jefferson [$15,200,000], Tony Parker [$13,650,000]
Summary: Gonna assume Richard Jefferson picks up his player option here, unless I missed something. They might start a trend of when being over the cap by $13 million, saying instead "one Tony Parker over the cap". UPDATE: Aaaaaaahahahahahaha Richard Jefferson probably should have asked Bonzi Wells for advice before this decision. Or like anyone with two eyes.
Final Verdict: Lots of sign and trade opportunity.

Toronto Raptors:
Current Maximum Cap Space: $6,243,868
Notable Free Agents: Summit tag-a-long Member #3 [$15,779,912]
Albatross: My eyes...
S&T bait: Eh.
Summary: Just look at all that Albatross! A core of Hedo, Calderon, Bargs, and Jarrett Jack through 2013?! And you thought LeBron played with some bad teammates!
Final Verdict: More like, sign and trade away.

Utah Jazz:
Current Maximum non-Cap Space UPDATE: ($5,518,526) ($6,176,046) (2 qualifying offers)
Notable Free Agents: Carlos Boozer [$12,323,900, no player option], Kyle Korver [$5,163,636, no player option]
Albatross: Paul Millsap [$7,600,000, through 2013]
S&T bait: Maybe
Summary: Doesn't look like there's much to do here, maybe leverage Kirilenko's expiring for a swingman to make way for Gordon Hayward. Also to buy Fesenko some shake weights.
Final Verdict: Well at least you've got some nice green jazzy mountains.

Washington Wizards:
Current Maximum Cap Space UPDATED: $14,861,038
Maximum Cap Space if that completely stupid trade with Chicago is true UPDATED: $5,032,042
Notable Free Agents: Are there markets for Josh Howard and Mike Miller?
Albatross: *points upwards at BasketBawful banner* [$17,730,693, through 2014, player option in 2013]
S&T bait: Ugh, who cares anymore.
Summary: So, back to this trade again. It becomes official July 8th or something, but with the Yi trade it pretty much shows how desperate the Wiz are to fill the slots. In complete give-up mode. On the plus side, I hope to see tons of John Wall driving and kicking it to Yi for the missed shot, followed by awkwardly looking at each other.
Final Verdict: Abandon all hope all ye who enter here.


-AnacondaHL

Labels: , , ,

70 Comments:
Blogger Dan B. said...
Hey AnacondaHL! You're not gonna believe this, but did you know LeBron James is a free agent??? Seriously! I just heard it on SportsCenter or something.

Ugggggggggggggggggh...

Blogger Sid said...
No way are the Sixers screwed for three years. No way. They will be contenders in 3 years time. Young! Athletic! Tremendous upside potential!

No this isn't a cue for realists to jerk me back to reality. Allow me to dream this fantasy, if you must jerk, be gentle.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
nice job AnacondaHL, thanks for the great post

Blogger Basketbawful said...
F***ing epic, dude.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Just now finally got a chance to actually look through the spreadsheet you put together. Holy shit. Good work, man.

Side note: you have to love a world where Darko Milicic is the 3rd highest paid player for the Timberwolves, just barely behind Mark Blount.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
There was a picture on the Internet I saw that took the 5 color terror alert system and re-did it as like the LeBron color alert or something. It was then that I decided to spend the many, many hours putting this together.

I also got sick of Chad Ford locking things to Insider, despite how all of this should be public knowledge. And I got sick of people rounding the numbers, when we could make clear assumptions with clear answers.

And finally, there will likely be a small follow-up July 7th when the actual salary cap is announced.

Happy LeBron-a-thon-ing!

Anonymous AdriĆ  said...
When does this FA bullshit end?

WV: "redness": Cool quality of the Bulls jersey that Lebron is gonna notice for sure.

PS: I have read ALL basketbawful posts (except some broken "word of the day" links). I also follow the "By the horns" blog. Good vibrations from Barcelona. I'm trying to spread the bawful word here. Thanks for all Matt & co.

Blogger Japes said...
But Ed Davis and Demar Derozan! Colangelo said they can be the new Chris Bosh and TMac!

Thanks for making me feel worse about the Raptors situation. UGH.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Adri-accented-a: When the rivers floweth with the tears of broken-hearted Knicks fans, their weeping and gnashing of teeth over-powering Kobe's jutted jaw.

In other words, July 8th. After that it'll be the signing of most rookies to 120% of that scale value, and other MLE and Vet Mins picked up here and there.

Anonymous Mr. Shrimp said...
Amazing epic post. Thanks. It really is all one ever needs to read about this. Nothing has illustrated just how insane it all is so clearly until now.

wv: slymed - there are too many possibilities, I can't go on.

Anonymous Brian said...
Thanks for glancing over the Bucks for 5 seconds. I was loving the witty comments throughout until I got to Milwaukee. You didn't even take the time to mention Michael Redd's rotting corpse for trade bait? Come on, thats worth at least a Ericka Dampier/Choke on a straw deadline deal.

Blogger Adam said...
Great post, Anaconda. I can't wait until all this FA BS is over. Even if this is a site that tends to focus on the negative, it's still kind of sad that the prevailing verdict for most teams is "Ya'll are fucked". The only mystery is in what and how many ways each team gets it.

Blogger Adam said...
Also, I don't know if this is old news by now, but it looks like Pierce is going to opt out of his contract. This is actually kind of interesting given his history with the team. Maybe there was some sort of disagreement over a wheelchair clause.

http://www.nba.com/2010/news/06/30/pierce.celtics.ap/index.html

Blogger Dan B. said...
DJ Gallo brings us a brilliant angle on the free agency market, comparing the teams to types of women.

Anonymous UpA said...
Truly impressive Anaconda! Let me guess... you work for a Bank or a Finance firm...

Or... you don't work and have a whole of a lot of time left to do this! JK

Such a clear vision of where the Max FA's will land should be shared to any GM on the look.

So, Miami sounds like they just completely destroyed their team for a chance on this FA's right, they are so much going to regret this if they comeback only with Summit Member #1 with a heavier contract, that should drop Miami from the contenders list at least 5 years...

And the CLE Craps, so sorry to hear they are sooo screwed, at least they have Antawn, clever move!

Again, so much for such a great job!

WV: xatie as in Xatie Price, sorta, lovely!

Blogger chris said...
AND...it's so sweet to see Discount Store as someone else's problem! :D

Blogger chris said...
Final Verdict: Who'd want to come to a team that gets screwed by the refs anyways?

Thanks for reminding me of the Purple Paupers' destiny. :P

HOWEVER

I guess I see what Washington is trying to do - make the Wizards so much less interesting to watch, so that people will show up to watch Strasmas and Ovechkin!

Oh wait! That's not part of the plan!? But it looks like that all the way!

Blogger Paul said...
hahahaha, Awesome job Anaconda!

I just learned this morning that Pierce is opting out of his contract.
I was wondering though. What do you guys think Pierce value is?

He is no longer a max contract player and the C's are not even thinking on going there.
But where do they draw the line?

Also, I'm not sure any other team (maybe the Clippers only) would be enticed to offer him more than $9 mill a year.

Blogger Sorbo said...
Great article AnacondHL. I forgot that Denver is screwed, weren't they preseason picks to dethrone the Lakers.

Anywho, with Pierce opting out, how does a Lebron/Rondo combo sound? At first I liked it but then felt mixed about it. There would be a weird combination of ugly jump-shooting with phenomenal interior passing.

Anonymous D. Highmore said...
I'm a Hornets fan. Should I kill myself now, or just wait until we trade Chris Paul?

Blogger Sorbo said...
Let the Wild Speculation begin!

ESPN is doing their darndest to bring up trade scenarios for every team that will probably never happen. For example, Broussard (the Tard) thinks that Portland should trade Pryzbilla and Miller to New Orleans for Paul. Because...NO is willing to dump one of the top 5 PGs in the league for one the that can's shoot outside of 15 feet.

This is going to be like that Bawful post on using the ESPN Trade Machine to build the worst team in the league.

Anonymous AdriĆ  said...
thanks AnacondaHL, still, I don't get the MLE thing, i have LBP (Limited Brains Power).

WV: "stiottl": Holy Fucking Retarded, in German.

Merry LeBron Eve, everyone!

Blogger Will said...
Notable Free Agents: Allen Iverson [$650,686]
this was the best part of the article.

Blogger Sid said...
@ Sorbo

Because...NO is willing to dump one of the top 5 PGs in the league for one the that can's shoot outside of 15 feet.

Can we question the possibility of any trade scenario in wake of the Gasol/Kwame trade? As KG puts it "ANYTHINGS POSSIBLE!!!"

Meanwhile, I'm drooling in anticipation of what the bawful gang will make of the epic bawfulry that's about to ensue. The next week should provide raw material for months worth of bawful. Bombs away guys, just a few more hours.

Anonymous Karc said...
This has been an ESPN production 2 years in the making. How pompous is it when both the ESPN Chicago and New York sites have James in a Bulls and Knicks jersey, respectively? I'm rooting for Prince James to resign with the Cavs, just so that stupid LeBron tracker gets taken off the site.

Kudos to Yahoo Sports, though, by staying relevant and actually reporting on the legit stories (they broke the official Mike Brown is fired story, along with some others).

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Well rumors are that Bosh to Miami is done. Sign-and-trade of some sort involving Beasley, Chalmers and Joel Anthony

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
MLE = Mid-Level Exception = Question 19 in Larry Coon's NBA CBA FAQ. So once a team has used up it's cap space, it can spend the MLE to sign one or more free agents for decent money before having to find people who will play for minimum salaries, etc.

Blogger Sorbo said...
@kazaam92, Where did you read/hear that? If Miami signs and trades for Bosh, they could still get Lebron, Wade and one more mid-level guy (Allen?). If I had Bosh/Wade, I'd try to get Ray Allen (or Reddick) and a decent shot-blocking center.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Also, as crazy and suspicious as this Bosh to Miami S&T sounds, I'll be reviewing NBA.com's Transactions page at the end of the day to update the spreadsheet and scenarios. I just can't believe the Raptors would be that completely stupid.

Re: Bucks - I really have no idea what they're trying to do. Little news and rumors, weird mix of contracts, Redd hasn't opted in yet, and it's freaking Milwaukee. Not even Yi wanted to stay there, and he's a Wizard now!

Re: Hornets - Can the fans throw the flaming oily sea turtles and birds onto the court all next season?

Re: Denver - Maybe one of the 2011-12 cap space teams is planning a Paul/Carmelo signing. How about them wishful thinkings?

Re: Celtics - They'll have to clear a little more room, but it's possible they can sign a max guy.

Blogger Sid said...
MLE- Merry Lebron Eve

On MLE, LeBron signs for MLE! This seems like a headline worthy catch phrase.

I read a theory by Bill Walton, that LeBron can play for MLE/or even less, and use the cap space to stack his team with superstars. He can make money via endorsements which will skyrocket when the super team wins 70+. Only that team would be way over the ego gap.

And this is probably not the most absurd trade theory around. Going off on a tangent here, trade theory invokes memories of economic classes. These classes had a bunch of trade theories of economics, the catch being you have to swallow some thick assumptions for these theories to hold up. The NBA GMs are probably diligent students of economics. This would go a long way towards explaining the endless bawful they serve up every season.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Quick clarification regarding MLE: that is, assuming a team hasn't renounced their MLE exception, as explained in Question 20.

Blogger Sid said...
typo-*ego cap*

Anonymous AK Dave said...
@Karc: Second the kudos to Yahoo!Sports. I don't read ESPN at all. Its Yahoo!Sports or Basketbawful for all my sports needs!

@AnacondaHL: a few things:
1) I'm glad somebody else thinks the Kirk Hinrich trade is retarded. Certain sports writers think its a "brilliant" move. I think its tarded. Not that Kirk is untradeable (far from it), but the Bulls are just rolling the dice with dreams of LeBron dancing in their heads. And WAS doesn't need another PG as you noted. WTF.

2) It is disgusting to see OKC getting so good. I wonder of Seattle will EVER get an NBA team again...

3) LOVE the shake-weight reference XD

Anonymous Heretic said...
John Wall is already looking forward to when he'll become a free agent. I have no idea wtf the Wiz are doing. 3 PGs?!?!?

I want to see Iverson play for phoenix so I can see Steve Nash totally lose his "Nice guy" personae by ripping AI's rectum out while humming a Lady Gaga song.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
@Sid:

"Ego Cap"- nice. sounds like a good WoTD.

Anonymous Axe Head said...
This isn't a free agent roundup. Since it's Basketbawful, it's the "Potential Albatross Roundup." The teams are lining up like cattle for the slaughter. "Hey, you, no cutting in line!"

Note: even LeBron might blow out his knee. Not hoping for that, of course, but if he does and he loses the explosiveness? His max contract becomes an Albatross.

And there are several guys who will be in decline towards the end of the contract, thus will be contributing less than peak performance, at a max price. Albatross.

Plus there are those who aren't max players anyway. Amare(Alba)tross.

Blogger Sorbo said...
I love how no one is talking about Tracy McGrady. Is he officially out of the league?

On OKC, what if they pulled the ultimate move and somehow swung Paul or Anthony either next season (via trade) or the following season (via FA)? They're good enough now to be the West's two-seed. OKC might be the most interesting team next season based off their salaries/contract situations. They really could go either way, become a West power or just completely fall off the map.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Updates: Sounds like Amar''''''e is opting out *fist pump* which at this point strongly implies he's heading out of Phoenix.

Hawks sound like they're preparing a 6-year Bird Exception for Joe Johnson. I'll rework a scenario using this cap hold.

I totally forgot about Perkins's triple ligament injury, I doubt he'll be traded if he's out for the season but who knows.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
I love how no one is talking about Tracy McGrady.

I'm sorry, who?

Blogger Basketbawful said...
I'm hearing that the Bosh to Miami trade is basically a done deal.

I will now throw up in my mouth.

Blogger Quinton said...
No Bosh is NOT going to Miami, that's a Morey smoke screen to surprise you once he ends up with the Rockets, book it!

Plus how huge is it that Ben Gordon stupidly walked away from that fat Chicago Bulls contract? They'd be in the crapper cap space wise right now if it wasn't for that one decision. If they land a free agent or two they should throw him a parade.

Blogger chris said...
I'm sorry, who?

Someone in the same boat as Starbury, right?

Blogger LotharBot said...
http://storytellerscontracts.com/ has the best salary information I've seen.

http://www.prosportstransactions.com/basketball/ lists future draft picks that have already been traded, so you can see which teams are short or have extras.

-----

Denver has some trade chips -- Kenyon Martin, Chauncey Billups, and JR Smith are a combined $36 million of 2011 expiring contracts. They may absorb an albatross and send out some picks in order to pick up a star (Okafor with Chris Paul? Calderon with Bosh S&T?)

Or they may be completely screwed if nobody wants to trade for 2011 expirings.

Blogger Sorbo said...
I'm sorry, who?

He's the guy who will be in a Magic jersey next season to create the ultimate team of guys who fade in big moments.

Plus how huge is it that Ben Gordon stupidly walked away from that fat Chicago Bulls contract?

I thought the Bulls offered him 5-year/$50M, while Detroit offered him 5/$60M. I'd consider taking an extra $10M to be Villanueva's go-to option. Just think, Detroit fans, only three more years before the Hamilton/Prince contracts expire.

Blogger Ash said...
"I'm hearing that the Bosh to Miami trade is basically a done deal.

I will now throw up in my mouth."

There's now way the other "Big Three" would go for this. Bosh would be the highest paid player on a team with Dwyane Wade and LeBron James if they go this route. You think Bron would be okay with that?

Edit: Captcha was "blega," in other words, the noise I'll be making if Bosh gets traded to the Heat.

Blogger chris said...
So Warriors' ownership in the mid-60s basically stated that Bay Area b-ball fans went to the Cow Palace (and presuambly, also the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium at the Civic Center!) to hate on the Big Dipper.

Looks like Pat Riley wants to go that route - at least the way ESPN's Patrick Hruby sees it. :D

Blogger Sorbo said...
Randon free agency sidebar: We need to debate if this is the best Artest WTF picture ever?

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_4ow2Juu7nMo/SkzbFDH4NHI/AAAAAAAARHU/5PN3RcDpmAw/s400/artest.jpg

Anonymous kazam92 said...
http://realgm.com/src_wiretap_archives/67632/20100630/multiple_gms_expect_bosh_to_end_up_with_heat/

Yes Bawful it DOES appear to be a done deal. You may proceed to throw up while I proceed to dance/spasm wildly out of joy

Blogger Ash said...
kazam92:

How do you expect to compete with two max players and something like 15 min players?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Slightly off-topic, but I've been looking for the original post on basketbawful that included more than one apostrophe in Amar'''e's name. Google has not been helpful (probably cause I don't have the right number of them). Anyone have a link?

Blogger Caleb Smith said...
Uh... the Hornets just got rid of Mo Pete's contract, and their worst contract, Peja's, comes off the books after this coming season. A 15 mil dollar expiring could be a pretty attractive trade piece... and even if they can't move it, all it takes is one season and bam... the Hornets have cap room.

They may not be players for the big time free agents right now... but thats okay. The situation isn't particulary dire, and certainly not fucked.

Blogger Caleb Smith said...
This was an epic post though.

Anonymous Heretic said...
If Bosh is going to Miami, it seems that Wade got his Gasol. Ofcourse the rest of the team is still shit.

Blogger Mintz... said...
@Sorbo

Lol, I think this might top it...

http://geekonfilm.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/ron-artest-getty.jpg

Anonymous Anonymous said...
As of today, Amar'''''e has officially opted out of his contract.

Blogger Ivan said...
Heretic - Funny thing is, there is no "rest of the team" as the Heat have absolutely nothing but empty roster slots at this point.

I find it hilarious that they'll pretty much set the record for most FA signings of all time this summer.

Blogger Ash said...
Seriously, this is ridiculous. This is like if Eddy Curry opted out of his contract today. It's bullshit.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
"kazam92:

How do you expect to compete with two max players and something like 15 min players?"


well if we don't get Lebron or another 3rd max, then we'll have a bit more cash to spend on help. If not then, we likely sign our 3 second round picks (don't sleep on desean butler) and I'm sure they can dig up some vets who want a ring. Those vets will play cheap with the idea that, if they win a title, they can make more money the next year (look at james posey)


honestly I feel the whole "who will be the role player" thing is supremely overstated.

Anonymous Gabe said...
I'm so shocked Rivers came back. I could see Ainge playing hardball with Pierce and Allen though and chasing them off. I hope it doesn't happen, I'd love to see them make one more run at it.

Anonymous Sorbo said...
@Mintz - That's a pretty solid photo. I can almost excuse the weirdness in that photo because Artest is in a foreign country.

I have so many questions with the dogs he's holding while taking his Pacers team photos: Like why are their dogs there? Why is he holding them? Was this going to be part of the team photo? Who's the photographer that agreed to that? Was he trying to be funny? etc...

If Miami gets Wade/Bosh, they may be able to swing a David Lee or Ray Allen or JJ Reddick too. Of course, how do they fill out the rest of the roster? D-League?

Anonymous MJ said...
Lovin the thunder from down under

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
12:01. Here we go. Updates from June 30th incoming.

Blogger Ely said...
http://i48.tinypic.com/ztvdoo.jpg

My contribution to the madness

Blogger Ivan said...
Sorbo - Regardless how they fill out their roster, that's still essentially 15 *new* guys (obviously 14 if D-Wade resigns) playing together for the *first time*. Talk about ensuing growing pains...so is it pretty much a given that Spoelestra will be SVG'd?

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Caleb Smith - I don't know how to imply this any more, but the Hornets really aren't doing well financially. Like, as is the rest of Louisiana. Paying an extra 11 million in luxury tax isn't helping things, with no future for a competitive team (or entertaining product). I stand by my "so fucked" assertion.

Anonymous Armand said...
For Spurs...

1) Trade Tony Parker and Richard Jefferson (sign-and-trade 21m for 3yrs) to the Raptors for Chris Bosh (sign-and-trade for the max) and Jose Calderon. Raptors will be delighted to get rid of Calderon and get a guy like Parker as compensation for Bosh.

2) Trade McDyess,Temple and Hairston to the Rockets for Shane Battier. The Rockets already have Martin and Ariza so they don't really need Battier.

3) Sign Tiago Splitter with the mid-level expection

PG - Calderon
SG - Ginobili
SF - Battier
PF - Bosh
C - Duncan

Bench - Hill, Anderson, Blair, Splitter

Anonymous Anonymous said...
just a tid-bit...did you know?
there is a houston rocket that has a personal cook that feeds him that "special" diet!!! i know this because i know the cook!

Blogger LotharBot said...
Guys, the Nuggets aren't threatening to ship out Melo.

That's just Mark Kizla, one of the most trbl sports journalists in Denver, making things up.

Blogger Caleb Smith said...
@Anaconda - "with no future for a competitive team (or entertaining product)."

As long as CP is there, the team is both competitive and entertaining in my view. They were a playoff team before CP went down last year.

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