chick fight

Let's see. A fight broke out during a basketball game in Detroit. Bill Laimbeer and Rick Mahorn were prominently involved. Mahorn got ejected. Yup, that sounds about ri...wait, what?! This happened during a WNBA game? You bet your vintage collection of Kobe Bryant Nutella it did.

As Hubie Brown might say, things got a little "chippy" late in the game when the Detroit Shock's Cheryl Ford committed a hard foul on the Los Angeles Sparks' Candace Parker, after which the ladies had to be separated. This was clearly the first mistake, as grappling women should never be separated for any reason. Let them work out their aggression in a natural, healthy manner. But be sure to supply baby oil and a small wading pool first.

One possession later, Parker and Detroit's Plenette Pierson were battling for rebounding position when Parker judo-tossed Plenette to the floor and, in the process, fell on her exceedingly firm and supple backside. Then -- in true Bad Boys fashion -- Pierson walked right into Parker as she was trying to get up...and all hell broke loose.

Parker threw a punch at Pierson right before getting tackled by Detroit's Deanna Nolan. Players and coaches from both teams waded in and it turned into a battle royal. During the scrum, the still very scary Mahorn knocked Lisa Leslie to the ground like a tiny insect. But unlike his playing days -- when his rough and tumble ways earned him the nickname "McFilthy" from Celtics radion broadcaster Johnny Most -- Mahorn did his damage while trying to keep the peace.

"I was trying to protect the whole game, the integrity of the game. The WNBA is very special to me because I have four daughters. I don't even raise my hand to them, and I would never push a woman. This game, I love this game too much." Dear lord...Rick Mahorn spawned?! Man, if I was dating someone and she took me home to meet her dad, and her dad was Rick Mahorn, I'd quickly call 911, knock myself unconscious, and let the paramedics sort things out. I would probably also wet myself at some point. But I digress.

Detroit coach Bill Laimbeer insisted that this little case of domestic violence was simply his attempt to make things better. "Rick Mahorn is known as a peacemaker, from even the brawl we had here with Indiana. He went out there to get people off the pile, and to get people to stop the confrontation. That's who he is, that's what he does." Yeah, right. What guy hasn't dreamed about wading into a pile of struggling, heaving women?

At least one person took exception to Mahorn's peace-keeping tactics: DeLisha Milton-Jones shoved and punched Mahorn after he unintentionally thrashed Leslie. She was ejected, along with Mahorn, Parker and Pierson.

To put a dollop of whipped poop on this crap sundae, Ford -- who sort of helped precipitate the whole thing with that hard foul on Parker -- sprained her right knee while trying to restrain Pierson, and left the floor Dwyane Wade style (i.e., in a wheelchair).

Here's the video. Watch it fast. I'm sure the YouTube Nazis will be taking it down shortly.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...
Malice at the Palace 1, the Detroit Lions, Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, squabbling Detroit city council members (who are now under FBI investigation), the Detroit Lions, a disgraced TV news anchor (who went to my alma mater and current employer, University of Michigan), the Detroit Lions, and now this. Oh, and the Detroit Lions. Well, at least we won the Stanley Cup.

Blogger KNEE JERK NBA said...
Good job by security keeping the people in the stands off the court. Oh, wait- there's nobody IN the stands at a WNBA game.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
you know I didn't even know, which team was which when I was watching that LOL

Blogger Dunpizzle said...
This is by far the finest moment in WNBA history

Blogger Unknown said...
Funny moment when Mahorn gets shoved and hit from the back, and then turning around calmly to see what's up.

Blogger Dustin C. said...
Go figure... flippin' Deee-troit losers starting figths again...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
caught this update just in time to flip to nbatv to catch the last 10 mins of the broadcast. entertaining but sad that the M-in-the-P had more testosterone than the mourning/larry johnson slapfest

Blogger Basketbawful said...
CW -- Hey now. This once incident aside, the Shock have won, what, one or two WNBA titles. Don't forget that.

kneejerknba -- Yeah, but you'd figure there'd be at least one horny guy or girl who would rush out and try to cop a feel. Right...?

shrugz -- Those WNBA players, they all look alike.

dunnpizzle -- Absolutely. Right ahead of the two dunks.

cubee -- I have the same reaction when I think I felt a drop of rain.

meta4one -- There's something in that Detroit water. Ambient radiation, maybe?

bug tuna -- More testosterone and less Jeff Van Gundy getting dragged around like a Raggedy Anne doll. And that's a damn shame.

Blogger PistonsGirl4Life said...
Honestly as the one lone real Shock fan on the planet, yesterday was a really sad day. Ford is done for the season and with the way the injuries keep piling up for her possibly her career. Without Ford, I don't think the Shock are championship material. Dear Pierson, thanks lady. Now does ANYONE believe me that Bill Lambs just maybe isn't God's gift to coaching women's basketball? This event was entirely predictable and that's sad.

PS, don't bother to make the stereotypical "OMFG it's WOMEN'S BASKETBALL" post, I won't be back to read these comments again.

Bawful, as always I love your site.


Blogger stephanie g said...
Candace Parker has brought back to back dunking and brawls in only her first year. Obviously the GOAT WNBA player.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
pistonsgirl4life -- I know you said you wouldn't come back to read these comments...and that's a shame. We don't have many of the type of commenters you're talking about around here. At any rate, Bill Laimbeer the coach is much like Bill Laimbeer the player: What he brings to the table can have serious benefits and just as serious detriments. I mean, on the one hand he's crafted a touch-as-hell team. But that tough-as-hell team is capable of precipitating events like the one that unfolded the other night. Among other things (as you documented last year on DetroitBadBoys).

stephanie g -- You know, there's actually some truth in that...

Blogger Unknown said...
You know this brawl might just go a little bit to qwell any WNBA detractors about the lack of heart or grit. I mean that was a decent brawl right there.

Nary a Melo back-pedal to be seen, or an Oneal having to practically kneel down to punch someone (it looked like he was punching a 4th grader).

Blogger m. Alana said...
Matt, how did I miss this? This was a very lullzy take on a funny incident. I may use it as evidence in the future when I say, "See, I have no problem with a well-placed baby-oil-wrestling joke!"

And thank you for not kicking me in the imaginary the post, at least.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Candace Parker was two assists shy of a triple double in her WNBA debut(while also setting a debut-record 34 points), and had a 5 x 5 a few games later. She then follows by getting headlines with dunking in consecutive games and this brawl. She's fifth in the league in scoring, first in rebounding and in the coming weeks will be trying to add Olympic gold and a WNBA title to her NCAA title this year, which would make her the first woman to do this, I think.

Candace Parker is having one helluva year, I'd say. It looks as though the WNBA might finally have their first legitimate superstar, as opposed to "WNBA star."

I first heard about Candace Parker five or six years ago, because she went to the same high school as my dad and I was going to college just down the road from where she was playing. My dad kept insisting that I go watch one of her games and I kept insisting that my time was better spent on message boards and video games. I'm starting to think that maybe I'd have a better story(or even bragging rights!) if I just went to one of her games after all.

Blogger PistonsGirl4Life said...
Well, then I stand guilty of a knee jerk reaction to an anticipated sexist knee jerk reaction... Gloria Stienem would be so proud :(

*PG4L turns in her keys to the GirlsWe'llHoopWithBecauseTheyAren'tStupid Club*