The best of the worst of professional basketball. And there's a lot of it.
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Monday, February 09, 2009
Kobe was kung fu fighting...
This pic was sent in by Basketbawful reader Dan B., who said: "Apparently Kobe has learned to do that flying kick move Liu Kang did in Mortal Kombat." Indeed he did. And he learned it by practicing on Luke Walton.
BTW, for anyone wondering what the context of that play was, it was the last play of the 1st half yesterday, when Kobe got stripped while trying to make a move with about 5 seconds remaining. Mo Williams was fine, as he recovered the ball and raced down court for an uncontested layup to end the half and give the Crabs a 10 point lead. Kobe certainly does have a tendency to flail like a madman whenever he gets the ball stripped, doesn't he?
Yes, he certainly does, Yams. he certainly does. Is that some rational open-mindedness I smell?
Let's all just consider ourselves lucky he didn't accidentally Kung Fu Lamar Odom's face, collapse his sinus cavity, and put him out commission for a month. Otherwise we'd all be in for another bloggery brouhaha.
All this time watching and playing basketball in my life, I never understood why when people get stripped of the ball it looks like their body exploded and their limbs flail in 4 separate directions.
Yes, you could argue that it's to buy a call, but the 'stripped' flail always looks different from the 'flop' flail. And EVERYONE does it too, from pick-up games to the NBA.
KB24, you're a prime example of why so many people hate Laker fans.
ET, Kobe definitely flails excessively when he gets stripped, either to emphasize that he was fouled or to make it look like he was fouled. You'll get no argument out of me on that. He and Tim Duncan are the most egregious examples of players that do this (that I can think of, anyway).
I respect that you guys don't want to inflame LA fans too much, but this picture makes me want to make a slight addition to the earlier kobe injuring Bynum controversy. I suspect about Kobe- and this is true with many floppers- that the purpose of his flailing- although not necessarily consciously intentional- is to hurt the opponents. It's like if you are a cyclist and get hit by a car, you punch out a window while you're at it.
Yes, it's part of his "super competitiveness" that he's praised for. But you can come off as a douche. I know because I did often when I was younger. Maybe the difference is, I always felt bad immediately after (and basketball wasn't my job).
Ahhh the Bruce "Lee" video gets me rofl-ing EVERY TIME!!!
And WHOAH, that was a sick comeback in that SF video. I stopped playing the SF series after SF2 Turbo. I used to love playing all of those arcade games that were hacked so that you could do a super-slow fireball while jumping and a hurricane kick that flew all the way across the screen and a dragon punch that would cover 2/3 of the playing field or have like 6 sonic booms on the screen at once... good memories of junior high!
Not to go all Cortez on you all, but for the record I'm the best Street Fighter (2, or 2 Turbo, or 2 Turbo Alpha - the last SFs that mattered) I know. It's a good thing too, otherwise I would have NEVER made all of that money or scored all of the honeys I did. Consider that a standing challenge, suckers.
*leans back and puts his arms behind his head with a satisfied smile...*
I agree with you that SF went south after SF2CE and just turned lame after Turbo Alpha-
But I have to say- the fact that you qualified your statement that you are the best SF player with the clause *I know* saves you from a lengthy e-mail in which I verbally dismantle your SFII skills, impressing nobody and sounding like a jackass in the process.
Let's just say, I bet I could beat you playing with Dhalsim and leave it at that. I used to spend hours at the arcade with nothing but $0.50, laying waste to challenger after challenger... and when I got the SNES and SFII, my skills became ridicufied. Boo-YA!
Too bad we can't do online PVP in SFII. That would be awesome (and by awesome I mean totally childish and lame)!!
I went to a basketball site and a Street Fighter discussion broke out?
I never played any of the SF games, but those who have may be interested in this site:
http://www.sirlin.net/
The guy is a (video) game designer and competitive Street Fighter player, I believe. He has a lot of interesting posts/articles aside from the Street Fighter stuff.
AK Dave - pssh. Dhalsim isn't bad. The key to him is to not make mistakes (a 14 on the Dull-fuego meter).
I made it through 5 years of college without losing. I used to let the dudes on my floor pick both their character and mine and I'd house them.
And if the rest of you are wondering, why yes, ever since I got married I really do have nothing to brag about. I long for the release that death will bring.
You know what? Upon further consideration, I'm disappointed in myself for skipping right over the obvious joke about Kobe learning Shaq Fu during Shaq's days in LA. Can you guys ever forgive me?
Everyone, as BadDave's college roomie, I can vouch for his Street Fighter prowess. It used to enrage me that he'd whup me with Vega, over and over again. Particularly since he'd constantly use that attack where Vega goes "Bli-bli-bli-bli!!" Somehow it made my losses seem more shameful. Of course, BD used to get riled up when I'd blow him out in NBA Live, so at some point we formed a pack to never play against each other. Street Fighter was a trade off and we'd do two-player co-op in NBA Live. And we've been best friends ever since. True story. Oh, and he has a tattoo of John Stockton on his left ass cheek, and John is passing a ball to the tattoo of Karl Malone on his right ass cheek. Also a true story.
Dhalsim was beefed up in Turbo, but in CE and the original he was a lesser character IMO, along with Balrog, and Vega. His slow footspeed was a problem, as was the lengthy recovery time from all of his stretch-attacks and his slide. Once blocked, he was pretty much always open to a counter-attack, so you had to play defensively and use lots of fire/flame attacks at a distance.
Really there was Ryu/Ken at the top, and then everybody else in that game. The shoryuken made those two pretty much the favorite in any fight; it just wasn't even fair to the other characters.
Anyway Basketbawful, the fact that you were tooled by Vega repeatedly is only slightly less shameful than the fact that your roommate was so good at SFII. I am going to stop commenting now before my true nerddom really shows. This was only a taste of my SFII (useless) knowledge!
In closing I say to you, BadDave- "You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance!"
Mostly agreed, but he was still playable. Vega was the real bitch of the game. EVERYTHING had higher hit priority that that douchebag.
Yeah - I never liked how Ryu was the best. Ken's fireballs were slower, so you could time it between fireballs to kick him in the wrist (always deadly!), but Ryu could fireball all day into the dragon punch. I pretty much stopped using him when I realized he was the only invincible dude in the game.
And our combined nerddom is about to mate and make a supernerd. Good thing I'm the male.
I can't let this epic conversation die, BadDave. I will meditate and then destroy you!
Vega was a bitch in that game, not only did he have low hit priority, but when he did hit, his attacks were weak and he had almost no combinations that were unblockable after the first hit. His sorry little rolling attack could be blocked after the initial strike, so that was pretty much useless (most of the specials that required a 2sec charge were useless), and his jump attacks were also weak and easily overpowered with a simple uppercut or roundhouse kick.
The other character who was pretty much worthless was Balrog. For such a fierce fighter when the CPU had control of him, he was just awful to play with. He only had moves that required a 2sec charge, he had no throw attack (only the head-butt hold), and his areal attacks had perhaps the lowest strike priority in the game, therefore making him completely impotent when facing anyone with a missile attack. The only thing he had going for him was that when he did connect, you felt it.
Agree about Ryu's invincibility. I preferred playing with E. Honda, Guile, Sagat, and (no surprise) Dhalsim. Chun-Li was a good character, but I never liked her. And try as I might, I never mastered Zangief's screwdriver attack. That's too bad, because I always felt like if I had the ability to pull that out at will, he would have been perhaps the strongest character in the game outside of Ryu/Ken. If done correctly, you could grab somebody who was in the middle of their fireball sequence, or even through a fireball.
LeBron blatantly flailed in the Indiana game tonight. Granger contested for the same space and LeBron flailed the instant he realized he couldn't get the ball.
BTW, for anyone wondering what the context of that play was, it was the last play of the 1st half yesterday, when Kobe got stripped while trying to make a move with about 5 seconds remaining. Mo Williams was fine, as he recovered the ball and raced down court for an uncontested layup to end the half and give the Crabs a 10 point lead. Kobe certainly does have a tendency to flail like a madman whenever he gets the ball stripped, doesn't he?
ReplyDeleteWally's face is probably still the funniest part of that image.
ReplyDeleteLiu Kang? Looks more like Bruce Bowen to me.
ReplyDeleteHow bout Kobe's rainbow shot to clinch the win? Only an MVP can make that shot. Suck it Cleveland
ReplyDeleteYes, he certainly does, Yams. he certainly does. Is that some rational open-mindedness I smell?
ReplyDeleteLet's all just consider ourselves lucky he didn't accidentally Kung Fu Lamar Odom's face, collapse his sinus cavity, and put him out commission for a month. Otherwise we'd all be in for another bloggery brouhaha.
All this time watching and playing basketball in my life, I never understood why when people get stripped of the ball it looks like their body exploded and their limbs flail in 4 separate directions.
ReplyDeleteYes, you could argue that it's to buy a call, but the 'stripped' flail always looks different from the 'flop' flail. And EVERYONE does it too, from pick-up games to the NBA.
Kobe's just stoked for the release of Street Fighter 4, and who isnt. I, too, was doing hurricane kicks in my office just a minute ago.
ReplyDeleteLooks more like a tatsu-maki-senpu-kyaku (that's a "hurricane-kick" for those of you who don't speak Street Fighter II)
ReplyDeleteAnd THIS guy can bust it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBV_fmFqZ3Y&NR=1
WA-TAAAAAAAA!!!!
At least the "Bruce Lee Bowen Kick" didn't get Wally Sczerbiak.
ReplyDeleteKB24, you're a prime example of why so many people hate Laker fans.
ReplyDeleteET, Kobe definitely flails excessively when he gets stripped, either to emphasize that he was fouled or to make it look like he was fouled. You'll get no argument out of me on that. He and Tim Duncan are the most egregious examples of players that do this (that I can think of, anyway).
If do right, no can defense
ReplyDelete/high-five to flohtingPoint for simultaneous SF references.
ReplyDeleteI respect that you guys don't want to inflame LA fans too much, but this picture makes me want to make a slight addition to the earlier kobe injuring Bynum controversy. I suspect about Kobe- and this is true with many floppers- that the purpose of his flailing- although not necessarily consciously intentional- is to hurt the opponents. It's like if you are a cyclist and get hit by a car, you punch out a window while you're at it.
ReplyDeleteYes, it's part of his "super competitiveness" that he's praised for. But you can come off as a douche. I know because I did often when I was younger. Maybe the difference is, I always felt bad immediately after (and basketball wasn't my job).
Ruben, your suspicion about Kobe is noted. Disagreed with for being silly, but noted nonetheless.
ReplyDeleteEvil Ted: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
ReplyDeleteIt's more like: "MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" (with upturned, extended pinkie finger placed to lower lip a la Dr. Evil).
ReplyDeleteWally's face - "Hey, I've seen that move before..."
ReplyDeleteAnd just for you SF fans: Kobe was just busting out MADNESS! IT'S UNADULTERATED MADNESS!!
AnacondaHL-
ReplyDeleteAhhh the Bruce "Lee" video gets me rofl-ing EVERY TIME!!!
And WHOAH, that was a sick comeback in that SF video. I stopped playing the SF series after SF2 Turbo. I used to love playing all of those arcade games that were hacked so that you could do a super-slow fireball while jumping and a hurricane kick that flew all the way across the screen and a dragon punch that would cover 2/3 of the playing field or have like 6 sonic booms on the screen at once... good memories of junior high!
The laction reports make me feel really weird.
ReplyDeleteThere's a picture out there of a typical Kobe strip flop with a rainbow between his outstretched hands reading FABULOUS!
ReplyDeleteNot to go all Cortez on you all, but for the record I'm the best Street Fighter (2, or 2 Turbo, or 2 Turbo Alpha - the last SFs that mattered) I know. It's a good thing too, otherwise I would have NEVER made all of that money or scored all of the honeys I did. Consider that a standing challenge, suckers.
ReplyDelete*leans back and puts his arms behind his head with a satisfied smile...*
OOOohhhhh, Baddave, baddave.... them's fightin' words!!
ReplyDeleteRound 1... FIGHT!!
I agree with you that SF went south after SF2CE and just turned lame after Turbo Alpha-
But I have to say- the fact that you qualified your statement that you are the best SF player with the clause *I know* saves you from a lengthy e-mail in which I verbally dismantle your SFII skills, impressing nobody and sounding like a jackass in the process.
Let's just say, I bet I could beat you playing with Dhalsim and leave it at that. I used to spend hours at the arcade with nothing but $0.50, laying waste to challenger after challenger... and when I got the SNES and SFII, my skills became ridicufied. Boo-YA!
Too bad we can't do online PVP in SFII. That would be awesome (and by awesome I mean totally childish and lame)!!
What happened to the Worst of the Night and Worst of the Weekend posts?
ReplyDeleteFelipe -- Don't worry. Worst of the Night will return tomorrow. I was just taking a little break due to the onset of flu-like symptoms.
ReplyDelete"Not to go all Cortez on you all, but for the record I'm the best Street Fighter"
ReplyDeleteSucker, I'm the best at everything! Why, I just beat the top ranked mountain lion last night...with one hand...while I was sleeping.
I went to a basketball site and a Street Fighter discussion broke out?
ReplyDeleteI never played any of the SF games, but those who have may be interested in this site:
http://www.sirlin.net/
The guy is a (video) game designer and competitive Street Fighter player, I believe. He has a lot of interesting posts/articles aside from the Street Fighter stuff.
Those Cleveland unis are sharp. Though not on Wally, or any white guy for that matter.
ReplyDeleteDikembe had a Super Mario in 36 seconds last night!
ReplyDeleteBruce Bowen stile
ReplyDeleteAK Dave - pssh. Dhalsim isn't bad. The key to him is to not make mistakes (a 14 on the Dull-fuego meter).
ReplyDeleteI made it through 5 years of college without losing. I used to let the dudes on my floor pick both their character and mine and I'd house them.
And if the rest of you are wondering, why yes, ever since I got married I really do have nothing to brag about. I long for the release that death will bring.
You know what? Upon further consideration, I'm disappointed in myself for skipping right over the obvious joke about Kobe learning Shaq Fu during Shaq's days in LA. Can you guys ever forgive me?
ReplyDelete-Dan B.
Everyone, as BadDave's college roomie, I can vouch for his Street Fighter prowess. It used to enrage me that he'd whup me with Vega, over and over again. Particularly since he'd constantly use that attack where Vega goes "Bli-bli-bli-bli!!" Somehow it made my losses seem more shameful. Of course, BD used to get riled up when I'd blow him out in NBA Live, so at some point we formed a pack to never play against each other. Street Fighter was a trade off and we'd do two-player co-op in NBA Live. And we've been best friends ever since. True story. Oh, and he has a tattoo of John Stockton on his left ass cheek, and John is passing a ball to the tattoo of Karl Malone on his right ass cheek. Also a true story.
ReplyDeleteDan -- Better late than never. Forgiven.
LOL, you guys remind me of this photo a few weeks ago: The SF champ
ReplyDeleteFrom this only occasionally humorous webcomic's blurb of the day. Good times.
Yeah. When I have to crap I call it the shit and roll.
ReplyDelete"How bout Kobe's rainbow shot to clinch the win? Only an MVP can make that shot. Suck it Cleveland"
ReplyDeleteYeah, how bout the fact that Kobe traveled on the shot? Don't believe me? Watch the tape. I could see it live, and it was clear as day on the replay.
BadDave-
ReplyDeleteDhalsim was beefed up in Turbo, but in CE and the original he was a lesser character IMO, along with Balrog, and Vega. His slow footspeed was a problem, as was the lengthy recovery time from all of his stretch-attacks and his slide. Once blocked, he was pretty much always open to a counter-attack, so you had to play defensively and use lots of fire/flame attacks at a distance.
Really there was Ryu/Ken at the top, and then everybody else in that game. The shoryuken made those two pretty much the favorite in any fight; it just wasn't even fair to the other characters.
Anyway Basketbawful, the fact that you were tooled by Vega repeatedly is only slightly less shameful than the fact that your roommate was so good at SFII. I am going to stop commenting now before my true nerddom really shows. This was only a taste of my SFII (useless) knowledge!
In closing I say to you, BadDave- "You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance!"
Mostly agreed, but he was still playable. Vega was the real bitch of the game. EVERYTHING had higher hit priority that that douchebag.
ReplyDeleteYeah - I never liked how Ryu was the best. Ken's fireballs were slower, so you could time it between fireballs to kick him in the wrist (always deadly!), but Ryu could fireball all day into the dragon punch. I pretty much stopped using him when I realized he was the only invincible dude in the game.
And our combined nerddom is about to mate and make a supernerd. Good thing I'm the male.
I can't let this epic conversation die, BadDave. I will meditate and then destroy you!
ReplyDeleteVega was a bitch in that game, not only did he have low hit priority, but when he did hit, his attacks were weak and he had almost no combinations that were unblockable after the first hit. His sorry little rolling attack could be blocked after the initial strike, so that was pretty much useless (most of the specials that required a 2sec charge were useless), and his jump attacks were also weak and easily overpowered with a simple uppercut or roundhouse kick.
The other character who was pretty much worthless was Balrog. For such a fierce fighter when the CPU had control of him, he was just awful to play with. He only had moves that required a 2sec charge, he had no throw attack (only the head-butt hold), and his areal attacks had perhaps the lowest strike priority in the game, therefore making him completely impotent when facing anyone with a missile attack. The only thing he had going for him was that when he did connect, you felt it.
Agree about Ryu's invincibility. I preferred playing with E. Honda, Guile, Sagat, and (no surprise) Dhalsim. Chun-Li was a good character, but I never liked her. And try as I might, I never mastered Zangief's screwdriver attack. That's too bad, because I always felt like if I had the ability to pull that out at will, he would have been perhaps the strongest character in the game outside of Ryu/Ken. If done correctly, you could grab somebody who was in the middle of their fireball sequence, or even through a fireball.
LeBron blatantly flailed in the Indiana game tonight. Granger contested for the same space and LeBron flailed the instant he realized he couldn't get the ball.
ReplyDeleteawesome picture...
ReplyDeletefound your blog on
http://manspage.blogspot.com/
more updates please